Sorry, I was referring to your question about advice on letters to adcoms. That, I think you can do yourself- if possible, you could even try a phone call.
Yes, you can ask a trusted CC poster to read an essay and offer comments. But not the over eager high school kids who have not yet applied, gotten results, or started college. And not just any adult on some list, as many read essays as if they are high school writing.
Before you write the essay, try to undertand what those target colleges look for. The essay isn’t just writing. It’s meant to reveal some of the traits or qualities the college likes and looks for. Use “Show, not just tell,” which means the reader can see it, via an example or other ways.