<p>Dad23, I'm so sorry to read about your difficulties! And no, I don't think all the sacrifice should come on the parents' side. Fwiw, I don't think your son's inability to understand the financial realities of your situation is that unusual -- most kids his age just don't have the maturity to understand these issues. I know that my kids don't! We were able to allow our older son to attend the school he wanted, but I spent a lot of time trying to make sure he understood all the factors involved -- Stafford loans on his part, the fact that he has to work during the school year, our loans mean we can't help with grad school etc. I'm still not convinced that he gets it.</p>
<p>In your situation, I'd vote with the least expensive option. He has his whole life to pursue graduate education or his own goals, but you have to think about your future financial security. Unless he's willing to support you and your wife in retirement, it's in HIS best interests to go with the flow on this choice. Life just isn't fair, and we don't always get what we want. It seems to me, though, that your son has benefited from a loving family, a private HS education and a SAH mom. </p>
<p>With that in mind, I would think you may still have a little time to contact the FA office at the private school to review your situation. I would do that on my own, without involving my son. If they really won't budge, then I think your son should go with the public option. It's also possible that he could transfer after a year, when your FAFSA income will probably be much lower. By the way, I think the Profile does ask for parent age, so some schools do consider that factor.</p>
<p>In any case, I wish you the best. The situation isn't easy, but your son does seem to have a good option with the public college. My husband and I both attended public universities, and it worked out fine for us, as it does for many people. As far as your relationship with your son goes, I think it will just take a little time. He's probably a little angry at life at the moment, but he'll get over it. I'm sure he loves for more than just your ability to write a few cheques.</p>