<p>Transportation costs about 2-5% of cost of attendence could be a reasonable expense. Of course that transportation would be made with deliberate planning for the best advance fares. A $50K school would easily allow for 3 RT at the 5% level. One year S had an extra RT at end of Fall Semester, he had 7 days between his finals and it was nearly cheaper to fly home rather than to stay at school and irritate his roommates and eat out. Another year he had almost 30 days between the semesters.</p>
<p>Both kids go to school ~1600 miles away; returned home
DD: freshman year - Christmas, spring break, summer; soph year: Christmas, summer; Anticipate junior and senior year will be the same.</p>
<p>DS: freshman year - Christmas; sophomore year - Thanksgiving; Junior year - Summer briefly for sister's graduation; senior year - christmas; since he graduated, who knows</p>
<p>S comes home for Christmas and summer only.<br>
He chooses to stay at school for Thanksgiving and Easter breaks rather than pay for his own tickets home. He's been invited to profs homes for dinner for the holiday meal--which is the only one that the cafeteria closes for. About 1/4 of the students stick around during those breaks.</p>
<p>Don't mean to redirect this thread - if you think it should be posted separately, Ill do that - </p>
<p>But, in reference to the increased airfare cost...does anyone know of a good credit card that gives air miles? Which card do you have success with, if you use one? Is there a plan that can be used with any airline?</p>
<p>Capital One that can be used with any airline. We use the Northwest credit card because it also captures Delta, Continental, Alaska, and KLM miles. And they have a very good cash plus miles program - Just got a roundtrip to DC for $150 plus 25k miles.</p>
<p>Navy Federal Credit Union has a great one - but there are membership restrictions.</p>
<p>We used to use American's credit card, but it became too difficult to get flights. We use NW now, and the cash + miles benefit is terrific. I am currently considering the American Express card that offers a ton of miles just to sign up & spend a few hundred dollars. I have to read the fine print, though ... if I can bank the miles into my frequent flyer account before the year ends, I can cancel & avoid the fee that kicks in after year 1. You have to watch for the no-fee-year-1-then-a-big-fee ... if your miles aren't used, you can't close your credit card account AND keep the miles in many cases.</p>
<p>If the distant college is near an airport that's a hub, the airfare may not be as bad. D2 can get some decent deals flying to Philadelphia, D1 going to Hartford is another story. Thanksgiving is expensive no matter what, but it's hard to do without them, especially the first year.</p>
<p>Just wondered---for those whose kids have chosen colleges far away---where those students generally 'adventurous' and independent during their teen years? My son is looking at CA schools (we live on east coast) but he's not spent a lot of time away from home (except w/family members). He's a bit of a homebody; generally social, but w/a small circle of good friends.</p>
<p>Not sure how a kid like this would fare 2k plus miles away? Thinking the best bet for a scenario like that is a very social, outgoing kid who has already developed confidence from a variety of other independent experiences? </p>
<p>Or, maybe independence would be good for a kid who hasn't exercised a lot of it, prior? Just seems like throwing them into the deep end of the pool, though.</p>
<p>PS United Mileage Visa gives ff miles!</p>
<p>Not much help here...S1, who is at school 2800 miles west WAS generally adventurous and independent all his teen years; plenty of trips without parents, primarily through boy scouts and student council conferences. He specifically did not even look at colleges within a days' drive and had no qualms about starting over with new friends and interests. That probably made it easier on us too. We always knew he'd go to college and never look back.</p>
<p>This doesn't directly answer your question, but I just got back from orientation for my oldest and heard something from a student advisor that was comforting. She and my son come from different directions but are both ~7 hours by car. She said it was actually helpful to her knowing that when she left home her freshman year, she <em>couldn't</em> come home til Thanksgiving (or Christmas for some of you farther away). It forced her to bond with the school and work out the kinks, unlike someone who could run home at any time. There is that bright side to having some distance.</p>
<p>I think as long as your kid understands up front what the parameters are on coming home and agrees to them, I'd let him venture as far as he wants. Independence is a valuable thing, and your kid might surprise you at how far he'd like to try spreading his wings. I wouldn't sweat the introvert/extrovert personality. Your kid will know what's right for him.</p>
<p>Those are interesting perspectives, thanks!</p>
<p>My dad is of the opinion that -- if student runs into problems/challenges and is 2k+ miles away---there's a possibility that they might drop out, instead of getting the chance to come home, regroup and try again.</p>
<p>Not sure what I think about this, but it does make sense on some level...</p>
<p>Jolynne: Our S is going far away, to his top choice. He is a homebody -- has been away without us twice only in his life. He isn't even very social with other HS kids, although he is with H & I. He is extremely independent regarding learning and studying, so we have no fears there. When he is living and going to school with other kids 24-7, he'll have to switch his social needs to his peers.</p>
<p>He is so excited about attending this school and the major that suits him to a T, that we are confident that he will do well. Plus, we have the advantage of family a couple of hours' drive away from his campus.</p>
<p>So much depends on how much the kid wants to do this. And just because a kid is close to home doesn't mean you can always solve problems, including dropping out. If they won't accept your help, you can't give it whether they are 2000 miles or 20 miles away.</p>
<p>Interesting, gladmom. I think that's true. Son chose not to work (academically) for a while in high school (then did a complete turn-around this year). And he lived here the entire time!</p>
<p>I agree about finding a school that's best for the student. I told son that I did not like the idea of him moving across the country--but if it were the best program for him in an environment that he felt strongly that he wanted -- I'd do whatever I could to support him.</p>
<p>Lots of good info from the other 'rents. I have just a couple thoughts to add.</p>
<p>If the school is not near a major airport, you could be on the same coast and still be paying a ton of money for 'short' commuter flights home. Check out some airline websites to see if 'you can get there from here'. </p>
<p>Our son is only able to come home at Christmas and summer, as we live in Asia most of the year. One thing that has been a huge relief, is knowing that we have good friends that could be with him in 30 minutes, if need be. He has spent Thanksgiving break with them, they have dropped him at the airport at Christmas, etc. It is wonderful to have surrogate family in the area.</p>
<p>We didn't plan for either of those two criteria, but they should have been at the top of his list. The location was a huge benefit of S's first choice school, and we didn't even know it when he was applying!</p>
<p>That's an interesting point, Karen (friends nearby). My hub has a good friend near to the CA schools son is considering, but not sure he'd be one to turn to except in extreme emergency (very tied up w/high-flying business/entertaining/travel/etc.). Then again, maybe that's all you need (someone who'll come in an emergency). Would be nice to have the 'come over for dinner any time' friends, nearby, though..</p>
<p>S1 attends college on the East Coast -- 2500+ miles from our home in Arizona. Fortunately, there are some direct flights between the two cities, but the total travel times (door to door) are a minimum of 8 hours each way.</p>
<p>S1 came home for Thanksgiving, Christmas, and spring break during freshman year. He then decided, on his own, that he wasn't coming home for Thanksgiving any more, because it just wasn't worth two long days of traveling (and having to deal with the big holiday crowds) for roughly 48 hours of family time in between -- particularly when he comes home for a much longer Christmas break just 3 weeks later. For the last two years, he has spent Thanksgiving with friends at school. (His school draws students from all over and the dorms remain open during all breaks throughout the academic year.) So he now makes just 3 round trips per year -- at the start/end of the year, Christmas, and Spring break.</p>
<p>^^Same here, in the opposite direction^^</p>
<p>S1 is in school in AZ and we are in CT. We flew him home for Thanksgiving last (his freshman) year, but he will not do it again for the same reason as worried_S1. He also did not come back at spring break because his fraternity had activities planned. At the longer breaks, the entire day of travel has not been an issue, even when connecting flights have been delayed.</p>
<p>Like Karen above, by chance my husband's college roommate (whom we are still close to) lives in Phoenix and has offered to be a resource should the need arise. In fact, last Thanksgiving, he ended up lending a bed to our son so that he could make an early morning flight home (college is 1-1/2 hours away from the airport). It IS a comfort to know that someone is available in a pinch, especially freshman year. After that, I expect my son's own network of friends will be enough. Although I would not be surprised if our friend eventually helps S1 purchase a car locally...just hope he lets us know ahead of time.</p>
<p>One thing you might look at, is how long the Thanksgiving break is. Believe it or not, some schools have the whole week off, and so coming home from far away is not as difficult than for those who only have Thursday and Friday off.</p>
<p>Both our Ds were/are 700+ miles away, and they both came home for Thanksgiving, Christmas and most spring breaks.</p>
<p>D2's school allows those who live more than 300+ miles from campus to request to stay over the Fall Break, Thanksgiving break and Spring Break. </p>
<p>Check and see what the policies are of the different schools. It is usually answered somewhere on their websites, but requires some digging.</p>
<p>Just some more info. My D's go to another State's U about 6 hours away. Sometimes they have flown when sales give good rates (christmas break it works because they get out early mid dec and go back first week of jan) but as stated thanksgiving and easter can be problematic. They do come home for thanksgiving/christmas. They drive sometimes. Even that is expensive now.</p>
<p>At our school you have to apply to stay over in the dorms for spring break, christmas and thanksgiving. You actually have to go to another dorm. Another issue is on some holidays they make you leave at 5:00 pm when campus closes.....putting kids with long drives and late classes on the road late.</p>
<p>On a happy note, the parents assist the out of state student organization with running airport shuttles on holidays but not all holidays. Its free if you sign up with pick ups on each end of campus.</p>
<p>The first year, I did make a mid semester visit to cut that first semester up a little and help transition them. Last year their brother and I made a 2 day stop there over his spring break before heading to the beach.....wasn't on the way but was interesting for him. </p>
<p>Although many state students go home on weekends, there are plenty of OSS there to hang out with.</p>
<p>FN: My second child is somewhat introverted so socially adjusting to a place where she knew one person her sister was a little isolating. At first she was overwelmed but then came to like and appreciate some "alone" time. At first she wished she had gone to her own State U. where she knew people from her h.s. But--college is different you have to go into it prepared to change. Nothing including friends is handed to you anymore.....you must seek out relationships.</p>