<p>my whole life i've been shy and timid loner. i suffer from a low self-esteem and a lack of confidence. people think i'm arrogant because i don't smile too often or talk much. i'm going to be a freshman in college this coming fall and i want to work on this. you know break out of my shell. i don't want to be a loner anymore, i don't want to sit in the back seat and watch life fly bye. i've been regretting a lot of things in my life and i don't want to do this in college. how do i go about doing this? a desperate plea of help. any advice?</p>
<p>just be yourself.</p>
<p>try to be more social and talkative.</p>
<p>smile, if you think that's what's making people not like you.</p>
<p>again though, just be yourself.</p>
<p>alcohol should help.</p>
<p>I don't know judging by the way he normally is he could try mainlining Heroin, nobody what notice a difference.</p>
<p>wow what great advice...</p>
<p>im really quiet as well. and i have the same goal of breaking out of my shell in college. what i have learned is that you really need to get out of your comfort zone...believe me its easier said than done. also as a confidence booster try going for a new look, its really important to present yourself well. i just cant wait to start fresh. also another way to meet new people is join clubs that interest you. make the best out of your college years...</p>
<p>good luck!</p>
<p>make friends with your floormates (make the first attempt), join clubs and make friends. honestly, it's hard for me to make friends too. for example, for me, it's really hard to just ask someone to be friends in class or something. If you join a club, at least you'll have ONE thing in common and then you can talk and expand. oh yeah, and don't be afraid to go and party (even if you don't drink). People always think that partying is synonymous with drinking (true to a certain extent) but plenty of the ppl ive met don't drink and just come to parties to make more friends.</p>
<p>How about reading this book, Leil Lowndes, 92 tips on how to talk to anyone very good book to help you out when trying to talk to anyone.</p>
<p>Ya....I agree with like most of the people on here. You can't just like go up to a random person and ask them to be your friend. It is with the people that join in the same interests that good friendships are rectified.</p>
<p>I agree with most except the alcohol one at top. Make friends with your floor mates but sometimes their personalities will just not fit yours. Try to join organizations that share similar interest at you. <---you make a lot of friends, even if a small group that way.</p>
<p>
my whole life i've been shy and timid loner. i suffer from a low self-esteem and a lack of confidence. people think i'm arrogant because i don't smile too often or talk much. i'm going to be a freshman in college this coming fall and i want to work on this. you know break out of my shell. i don't want to be a loner anymore, i don't want to sit in the back seat and watch life fly bye. i've been regretting a lot of things in my life and i don't want to do this in college.
I can relate to all of this. You've just described most of my fears about college :eek: ... which is such a shame, because otherwise I'm really looking forward to it.</p>
<p>alcohol DOES help
when you are drunk you dont think when you do stuff
you will realize how easy it is to talk to people and do things</p>
<p>after that you will slowly care and think less about what you say and what you do and you will start to become more outgoing and confident</p>
<p>I've benefited more from the influence of alcohol on other people, actually. I wrote this in my journal earlier this year after my second-ever party (oh, shut up): At parties I'm out of context, and it's almost as if I'm a different person. I get invitations to play drinking games and to go outside and smoke, even though I don't smoke, and get caught up in conversation with people I never talk to otherwise. I get hugs goodbye from guys (yes, more than one) and kisses in the air next to my cheek. Apparently, I'm socially deprived enough to be shocked whenever someone actually treats me like a girl and not a piece of background scenery. :rolleyes:</p>
<p>For you guys alcohol might help, but you cant be drunk when going on interviews after college or when you want to make a presentation. Someone shouldn't have to depend on alcohol to be sociable. Just my opinion.</p>
<p>^I agree completely. I hope it didn't seem as if I agreed that the OP should use alcohol as a crutch; my post was meant to be facetious.</p>
<p>Sorry, yeah I thought you were suggesting she get drunk every night to make friends. I took it seriously because I go to a school were people believe its true and from living in the dorms, I have seen the police called because of girls passing out in the bathroom in a pool of vomit or peeing in there roommates room thinking its the bathroom.</p>
<p>Now I know that alcohol isn't very popular with some people, but maybe thats what you need. NO, don't go take 12 shots of tequila, but maybe something to loosen you up a bit.</p>
<p>LOL, no, that's actually the opposite of what I meant to say... I tried to say, somewhat jokingly, that other people's uninhibited drunken behavior can make you feel less self-conscious even if you aren't drunk yourself, especially if they're friendly drunks and you trust them not to do anything too ridiculous. :D</p>
<p>I'd rather not get into the subject of debating drinking, as there are already two threads.</p>
<p>So OP, just remember that there are going to be TONS of people who don't know anyone. Sure, it might seem kind of hard to "put yourself out" when trying to meet new people, but I guess that might be natural.</p>
<p>yeah alcohol should help ;)</p>
<p>haha.</p>
<p>dont worry dude you're gonna be a pimp soon.</p>
<p>also keep in mind that probably no one knows you at your new school. In other words, no one has to know you were shy, so there's no reason to remind yourself you were. Don't think in negatives (i hope i don't.....) think in positives (i will, i can)</p>