<p>Lots of tangents and debates here. The OP may or may not consider therapy. In the meantime, can we parents offer some tangible examples of things that diffused family stress? </p>
<p>For example, when we had tough times with one kid we tried to find opportunities to do things with her where we were NOT on her case. Watching football games. Playing Trivial Pursuit. Even TV (all 7 Seasons of West Wing on DVD, “The Big Bang”, “Office”). Yea, we still had to be on her case a lot. But doing so relentlessly made things worse.</p>