<p>^Agreed. Better still, whether they (fa) WANT to know or not, wouldn’t one want to know that they had done everything in their power to facilitate the viability of going to the first-choice school? There is nothing unethical about honestly communicating need if it is done respectfully. </p>
<p>So, in response to the OP’s actual question, you could word it this way:</p>
<p>“XXX remains my first choice school but due to fiscal constraints within my family and a much more competitive offer from a peer school (name amount, if not the school re: confidentiality) we’re not certain XXX school remains a viable financial option. Are the any other opportunities for merit awards for which I might apply or a process for review of my need-based aid package in which I can engage prior to the May 1st deadline? Are there additional circumstances about our family’s financial situation which could assist in the reconsideration of my package? Please understand that I appreciate your generosity and the time and attention you have given our file. I did not want to decide in the favor of the second choice school without first investigating whether or not there were ways to make my attendance at X viable, and will appreciate any guidance you can supply.”</p>