How to politely tell my roommate to stop using my stuff

<p>Or at least start treating it properly. I'm a junior, so I'm not exactly new to roommate living, but this year was the first that I'm in an on campus apartment that has a small kitchen. 90% of the stuff in our kitchen, my parents bought me. She hasn't really contributed anything to the apartment at all really (the tv, DVD player, plates/bowls, glasses, silverware, etc. are all mine). Her family doesn't have a lot of money, so I can understand why she doesn't have a ton of stuff, but it's annoying to feel like my parents are financing her apartment living, especially since she doesn't treat my stuff with any kind of respect. She takes my tupperware over to her boyfriend's place without asking and leaves it there. When she brings it back, it's got all kinds of melted spots from where she's microwaved it or it has some kind of horrible lingering smell. She dulls my knives because she obviously has no idea how to chop and my cutting board looks like someone's taken a saw to it as result. And to top it all off, she never cleans the dishes, just lets them pile up with food and junk in them for days. She acts like my stuff is her stuff. When you're letting someone use all of your things, is it unreasonable to ask them to use them correctly in return, or at the very least take the time to clean them?</p>

<p>I don't want to be rude or hurt her feelings; she's my friend and she's a great roommate in other respects. But I take very good care of my things and it infuriates me that she's ruining them. My parents (and myself) work hard to pay for that stuff and we shouldn't have to buy replacements because she doesn't feel like she should have to put forth any effort to maintain things that aren't even hers. How do I tell her to either buy her own stuff to use and destroy or to treat my belongings properly without coming off as a jerk and offending her?</p>

<p>I think I can relate a little bit to you. My roommate use to click really obnoxiously and use his headphones so loud that I could hear them from the other side of the room. You probably feel like it’s common courtesy to ask before using things & cleaning them after use, as I do as well…but not every roommate is as polite as far as respecting others’ belongings. I think the best thing to do would be to simply come out and mention the damage and ask that she be more careful with your belongings and clean them after your done so that they last for the semester at least. Or if you would rather she not use them at all, you can mention that you feel it would be best for the both of you if you both used own silverware/tupperware. </p>

<p>No need to be confrontational, but this is an issue and communication is key in roommate conflicts. If your roommate is reasonable and you mention the problem politely, I think they will respect your conflict without taking offense to it.</p>

<p>[College</a> Humor - Don’t Touch My ■■■■ (with Leighton Meester) - YouTube](<a href=“College Humor - Don't Touch My ■■■■ (with Leighton Meester) - YouTube”>College Humor - Don't Touch My ■■■■ (with Leighton Meester) - YouTube)
I think you’ll appreciate this video.</p>