How would you react to THIS?

<p>Once I gave someone else permission to alter a letter to the editor I'd written and submit it with my name on it. I still cringe at the changes made--this was not my voice, but it had my name on it--I'll never do that again.</p>

<p>10 to 1 the boy whose mom filled out the applications and essays for will not finish at the college mom 'chooses' for him. Because, if it means so little to him to fill out the application, he won't even make a choice. Mom will chose the college and chose his major. And then son will either flunk or drop out. </p>

<p>Or, son is overwhelmed with the entire prospect of college and is waiting for his parents to give him some guidance . Instead mom does the entire process for him. Son is in the dark about everything and lives with it because he KNOWS college is out of his reach financially unless his parents pay and this is how he has to play it with his mom to make peace.</p>

<p>From the current thread over on the College Essays forum:</p>

<p><a href="http://talk.collegeconfidential.com/showthread.php?t=401098&highlight=essay+tufts%5B/url%5D"&gt;http://talk.collegeconfidential.com/showthread.php?t=401098&highlight=essay+tufts&lt;/a&gt;&lt;/p>

<p>I have another take on all this. Despite the fact that I am one of those people who has always felt that many of the posted sample essays in guide books and websites would indeed qualify as overly "edited" or "polished" I am beginning to think that it really doesn't matter all that much, or as much as we think it does - either one way OR the other. Maybe I'm completely off base here, but reading between the lines of this post:</p>

<p>


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<p>...it's my feeling that the admissions reps reading these essays know that some kids are going to have gotten comments on their 10th revisions and that others are going to send theirs in unseen by human eyes. What this rep seems to be saying is that whether perfect or imperfect, syntax or style is less important than what the essay reveals. </p>

<p>BTW, I've said this before, but at the majority of info sessions we have attended, admissions reps have strongly suggested that students have their essays looked over, either by a teacher or other similar person, before sending them in.</p>

<p>Editing to add that my comments don't, of course, refer to doing a student's work for them. It's amazing that a parent would risk telling the OP something like that!</p>

<p>I was thinking about the academic point made above by the graduate student.</p>

<p>After writing this personal lens essay to gain admittance, will a college student ever again be asked to write in this genre for a college course?</p>

<p>I think the essay is relevant to WHO is the person being admitted, so it's legitimate to ask for it. My thesis is it's most relevant for small residential colleges that depend on students participating actively in the communal life of the college to make the college "go." </p>

<p>I'm less sure why it's relevant to a big meat-grinder place where the student is one of 30,000 students and takes four courses each semester plus many elevators. I'm probably missing something here, but after he's on campus, will anyone CARE any more about that student's personal approach to anything?</p>

<p>Maybe the exercise is more for the student than the college. I know students feel proud of their essays once completed, so perhaps the very growth process that occurs while they do it makes it worthwhile for them. It could serve as a rite of passage or chance to articulate (for themselves!) who they are at that moment. </p>

<p>Perhaps the college owes THEM $60 for writing the essay, LOL.</p>

<p>"After writing this personal lens essay to gain admittance, will a college student ever again be asked to write in this genre for a college course?"</p>

<p>Yes, if they take a writing course. There are classes designed to teach writing personal narratives, poetry, fiction, etc. That type of class would require it but no one is required to take that kind of class unless they want to.</p>

<p>Well, people applying to grad school need to write a statement of purpose, which is kind of similar but more specific to academic preparation and goals.</p>

<p>I never wrote essays like this for college. But I can see the value in it. You've probably noticed that the process of writing the college admission essay is a process of self-discovery for these students. It's really the first time they've had to express who they are and what they want. That's an important door to open, and for many students, I suspect it leads to more frequent self-evaluations and self-exploration - excellent and necessary tools for successful people and students.</p>

<p>
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the very growth process that occurs while they do it makes it worthwhile for them.

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<p>
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That's an important door to open, and for many students, I suspect it leads to more frequent self-evaluations and self-exploration - excellent and necessary tools for successful people and students.

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<p>Thank you p3t and DSPhD. That was our experience, and it's not to be underestimated.</p>

<p>The personal growth from the whole application process was phenomenal. Huge. No way would I want to shortchange that experience. And I mean everything from researching, corresponding, filling in every blank on the app, writing, editing, revising, checking with readers, getting ticked over character count, taking things right up to the deadlines, standing in line at the post office, the works. </p>

<p>One family, one way. I trust that every family will find what works for their own. My best wishes for a good process for all the families currently in the throes.</p>

<p>Parents who write their kids' essays for them obviously have little faith in the abilities of their children ... and great faith in the idea that their children "deserve" to get into the <em>best</em> schools. How sad. I imagine that these children will never really grow up. They'll be relying on Mom & Dad for years to come. Mom & Dad will most likely give them all the help they need. The problem is ... what is going to happen to the NEXT generation?</p>

<p>Once again, I find myself a grumpy old lady. I just can't understand people anymore.</p>

<p>Though I think copy editing and content suggestions are within the realm of acceptable, I think that writing a kid's essays is blatant cheating. I also think "hiring" a professional to work on an essay with a kid comes close to cheating as well. Sadly, I know that many of the kids I know who've gotten in to top schools have had this kind of help.</p>

<p>Not sure I would have cared much about it... Who is to say her writting would be better than her child's... mine is NOT! But I know my son's grades, SAT's and Ec will give him credit earned</p>

<p>It's not really new, I know some friends here at Stanford who paid $3000 to get his/her essay written by professional service. Hey as long as it works. That's our world's motto nowadays.</p>

<p>2 questions....</p>

<p>S has done all his own application work so far (which isn't much, by the way, though he does have rough drafts for all his essays), but I wrote a resume of his extracurricular activities. It had never occurred to me that this might be a problem until reading this thread. We haven't sent it anywhere yet, so this can still be undone. So....do you think that's unethical or violates the spirit of "the student's own work"? Since S was homeschooled, that resume is really important. He needs to show that he hasn't been locked in his house for the last 12 years. Which brings me to my next question...</p>

<p>S emailed one of his rough drafts to his older sister and didn't show it to me. She told me about it. In it, he says he was raised "in a cult-like environment". Okay, I know you guys don't know me, so you might be thinking, "Well, maybe it's true." Well....it's not. Yes, he has always been homeschooled (until he started taking dual-credit courses in his jr. year). Yes, we are Christians and go to church sometimes twice a week (but usually once). Our faith is a big part of our life in general. S goes on his own to Sunday night youth group and Wednesday night Bible study. We don't require it or even suggest it. He likes to go.</p>

<p>He is going through a real crisis right now (older S did the exact same thing his senior year) and believes we have made his life miserable by homeschooling him. Older S got over this pretty much as soon as he hit college and now is glad he was homeschooled. Mostly that's because he realized he was very well prepared for college and struggled less than many of his classmates did. But, younger S is in the big middle of it, so I can understand that being reflected in his essay.</p>

<p>I wonder if I should ask D to talk S into showing me the essay. I don't want to rat her out by telling him I know about it. I just want to caution him that if the adcoms believe him, it will likely hurt his chances, not help them. He is throwing into question his whole transcript, since I (his cult-like mother) prepared the transcript, course lists, etc. If he is firm that he wants the essay to go out that way, then fine. That's his decision. But I do think we should talk about it. What do you think? Is this important enough that I should butt in with my input?</p>

<p>Absolutely! I think you should speak to him and reiterate that his older sister is only looking out for his best interest, etc......if it is too negative, then yes it could have an impact on the way admissions looks at him. I think in this case its important for you to try and delicately step in. His essay is obvioulsy a reflection of his current state of mind, chances are that he will in the near future look back and regret writing such a personal type of essay, if the big sister has more clout with him then perhaps she could step in. Good luck!</p>

<p>I am sure that some very large fraction of applicants to "top schools" either have heavy parental involvement in essay writing, or hire professionals to "review and make suggestions" on the essays for the student. I could post links to several Web services that provide this service, but it would violate CC's terms of use (and rightly so). So, yes, I think you are innocent, and you should be proud of your outrage.<<</p>

<p>I think this is the single best reason for the Writing section on the SAT and for why colleges should weight it equally with the other sections. It's the one place where they can see what a student can do on his/her own without adult interference.</p>

<p>timely, I think such an important question deserves its own thread, because otherwise many posters may not see your question. You might want to resubmit this under a new title. In case you don't/can't, my suggestion would be to ask the older d for more details. I don't think that the phrase "cult-like environment" is necessarily damaging unless much of the rest of the essay is a negative portrayal of his upbringing. It's even possible that he may have used the phrase ironically or in an eyeball-rolling tone.</p>

<p>If the older d agrees that the essay is likely to be viewed negatively, I'd ask your son to share the essay, not only because of its impact on his applications, but to gain more insight into his current state of mind. Since you've been one of his primary teachers (and I presume need to write a recommendation or statement of your own?), the lines are drawn a bit differently, imo at least.</p>

<p>You writing the resume is sort of like a school doing a transcript, I think.</p>

<p>About the essay, do you think older sister would be willing to talk to him, so you don't have to "rat her out"? She must be concerned since she told you about it.</p>

<p>I wonder if I should ask D to talk S into showing me the essay. I don't want to rat her out by telling him I know about it. I just want to caution him that if the adcoms believe him, it will likely hurt his chances, not help them. He is throwing into question his whole transcript, since I (his cult-like mother) prepared the transcript, course lists, etc. If he is firm that he wants the essay to go out that way, then fine. That's his decision. But I do think we should talk about it. What do you think? Is this important enough that I should butt in with my input?<<</p>

<p>I think that any of us would find it hard to read a college essay that was essentially critical of our parenting. On the other hand, it is an adolescent's job to break away from us and our job to show them that we don't break when they do. As long as it is a well-thought out piece on his reflection on his upbringing and what he wants to do independently now, I can't see how it would "hurt" him with admissions. In fact, it might actually help with an adcom who stereotypically believes that a homeschooled child was the opposite of independent.</p>

<p>I had a coworker whose son attended an expensive private boarding school. The guidance counselor there had the students submit their essays to him before they left for the summer so he could correct them by September. I really don't see how this is any worse than a parent who has input (or even extensive input) into the application essay. I don't think either is morally right but it does happen. So, if I don't look over my kids' essays (since our gc has a caseload of about 500 kids and is lucky to even talk to each kid), they are at a disadvantage. In fact, if I am not as fine an editor at the private school gc, they are at a disadvantage. <<<just playing Devil's Advocate here. </p>

<p>And consider this: if a hs student is really just too darned busy to fill out applications and write a few essays given many months notice, he is waaaay overscheduled.</p>

<p>Definitely intervene in essay process. Perhaps select different topic that does not bring up resentments and issues being worked through right now. Remind your son that his job on his application, sad but true, is to reveal and market himself as an asset to the institutions he is applying too. Tell him his first paper in English comp. can probably be about his "cult" upbringing.</p>

<p>I don't see a problem with the resume, unless you are padding it, which I am sure you are not. However, I would think it would be more helpful if you sat together and you prompted him. Then you would each recall a fuller share of what he actually did, and he would be able to own the full reach of what he accomplished.</p>

<p>PS This may be a time for him to talk to someone outside of the belief system he is rebelling against so he feels heard. Just a thought.</p>

<p>My mom does the clerical work. My parents write horrible essays so that would not even be an option for me lol.
I honestly would feel insulted if someone told me to pay money to them and they would write my essay. What makes them think I need help? What makes them think they can write a better essay than me?
As I am reading your stories, I'm chanting "tell on them! tell on them!" I'm just bitter and angry I suppose. I hope every one of those who cheated through the process gets a very thin envelope.
I think haveing English teachers give a few comments is fine though.</p>