I committed a huge mistake my freshman year of college and I need advice

Student Lounge College Life
1

The only thing I ask of any reader is to read it all:

Here’s my story.

As I write this i peaked

My name is _____ and I committed a huge mistake. I’m an only child of two amazing parents whose unconditional love has been demonstrated every single day. My father is a high level official of the government, that’s granted me a number of positive and negative traits. I live a lavish lifestyle which is on the verge of being ruined.::::

I lived in a country where drivers and maids are the status quo. I then graduated from the best private high school in my country of birth (outside the US). Always being a slacker, I also consider myself a smart kid.

Now that that’s out of the way. The issue.

My parents moved away, which means the government no longer pays for everything of ours (cars,gas,education,dope apartment, drivers etc.) To clarify, I moved to the US for the first time (I speak both spanish and english beyond proficiently, fluently.)

I was never into the weed thing because it wasn’t part of my ‘elite’ society or whatever you want to call spoiled rich kids. I then moved to ______ to only join the same community of international rich kids. A community I no longer related to as my parents don’t earn anything beyond 200,000$ before tax. (something I didn’t know until my dad started telling me to lower my spendings).

That having said I also have family savings which came in clutch and am fortunate enough to pay for my college education no problem.

This year I was given a credit card with essentially no limit, that coherently lead the path of my beyond destroyed GPA (which stands somewhere along the lines of a 1.0 and a 2.0 on the 4 point scale), possible depression, sleep deprivation, and anxiety. I became dependent to Marijuana to a psycho-active level. I smoke to mellow out my current problems.

I took a slot that was made for one of the greats. A great family, education, and both emotional and monetary support.

I blew a full years worth of education (somewhere along the lines of eighty thousand dollars).
My median spendings on a monthly basis was 5k.

My father walked into my room today and told me if I spend at this rate, we will end in debt.

Now forget all my personal stuff for a moment, as that was just said to give understanding,

What the fuck do I do regarding my academic profile?

I love the city in which I live, and will have an expensive apartment next year and I will enroll into classes as well. I signed up for two summer courses to make up for some lost credits. I refuse the ideology of community college and I need to raise my GPA to the point to hide this and why is that?

****The main problem here is that my parents don’t know I do drugs, and they also don’t know i failed 6/10 classes my freshman year. My initial plan was to forever hide the entire freshman year via photoshops of screenshots of my grades. It worked. Now I need to clarify my future as I can hide a gpa but I won’t be able to land a job.

Please help im kind of freaking out.

Not to a suicidal level, as I mentioned earlier regarding anxiety and depression. Those are really just creations of my imagination that i seem to think I have when I have too much time to myself.

2

Contact your college academic adviser and ask. Ask for a late drop or withdrawal for medical condition. Ask how to restore your GPA and that might mean attending a community college for two semesters and earning top grades there. Immediately start treatment for pot addiction. Find a much cheaper appartment with roommates who are substance-free. Good luck.

3

good luck to you and good that you realized you need help. the substance abuse team at your school will help you decide what to do next.

4

Stop smoking weed and stop doing drugs. You’re basically self-medicating your anxiety and depression away. $80,000 is a lot of money to plow through in one year. If your friends are also heavily into drugs & alcohol, then you seriously need to consider finding a new peer group to hang out with.

Go to your campus counseling center and talk to them. Also talk to your school’s academic adviser. And you need to come clean with your parents as to the problems you’re experiencing. Trying to cover it up will only lead to negative things down the road.

Re: your personal issues with community college -
I have some tough love for you. I don’t mean this in a hurtful way, but it might not come across in the written word like it’s intended. Get over yourself. Your privileged lifestyle is over. No more maids, personal drivers, etc. There is nothing wrong with taking classes at a community college…especially one that has a transfer agreement with a university that you’re interested in.

You know why it’s not a big deal? Because when you graduate with your BA/BS, you know what’s NOT on the diploma? The community college.

Community college classes tend to be much smaller than at large universities. This can be helpful for students who tend to get ‘lost in the crowd’ in big lecture classes of 300-800 students.

If you don’t bring your grades up, regardless of whether or not the photoshopping of your grades worked in deceiving your parents, once the university kicks you out for NOT bringing your GPA up, what will you do after that? What you should NOT do is just more of your current coping mechanisms. If you are forced to drop out, do NOT lie to your parents and pretend to be enrolled & thus just smoke away the rest of the college savings. I have seen people do this and in those situations, it has led them into very serious drug addictions and it’s pretty much wrecked their lives.

You are at a cross roads right now. Admitting that you have a problem is the first part in getting better. You have some very serious decisions to make in the path that you want your life to be.

5

The critical thought and words you guys have written really calmed me down as I haven’t slept all night. I also intend on lowering my consumption, it was really the parent thing that was tripping me out. Further than that I’ll make decisions based on what my academic advisor tells me monday. Thanks.

6

Have you been put on academic probation/been asked not to come back?

If so, you may need to go to CC to focus, improve your GPA and figure out what YOU want to do.

Stop the drugs…if you still feel anxiety talk to a doctor and get meds for that.

If my child did this, I would want them to:

  1. Own up to it
  2. Tell the truth
  3. Tell what led to this
  4. Talk about a realistic plan for going forward …this may include staying at your school or CC, how you are going to deal with anxiety, how you are going to find different friends so as not to be sucked back into drugs, and take drug tests to show me you are substance free.
  5. Talk about how they are going to pay that $$ back
7

If you really want to fix this, you can, but you need to want to, and it won’t always be easy. However, you’ll be SO proud of yourself when you do!

Really listen to what your advisor says on Monday and let them help you form a plan, and then stick with it. That’s it. Don’t get distracted by friends or shopping or drugs or whatever. You can fix this, but only if you stick with the plan.

8

Go to rehab this summer. Don’t “lower your consumption”, stop it. This is a drastic step, but does your college have a sub free dorm? Give up your apartment and move in there. It will help you find new friends with completely different values & expectations.

9

Given “two amazing parents whose unconditional love has been demonstrated every single day” and the seriousness of your problems, I think you should tell your parents about them. They will want to help you and will figure out how.

10

Good advice in the posts above. Find different friends. Are you able to work in this country? A part time job where you can meet other students who are making good progress in school but don’t come from wealth might be good for you, Stop saying silly things like " I refuse the ideology of community college."

11

Ask to room in the substance-free dorm. It’ll ensure you make new friends who’ll steer you to a path of non consumption and it’ll help you stabilize your hours in a healthy way. SO NOT stay in that luxury apartment.
I agree you should take a part time job and save the money to pay back all the money you wasted. If your parents don’t want it, give it to the counseling center where you’ll be attending regular sessions.

12

Be a better man!