<p>DII Worse yet you may have to face the situation where you find out that someone less qualified or deserving got it. There are folks who scam the system and get away with it. You can’t go crazy over it. Good luck</p>
<p>Okay, I guess I’m feeling masochistic today, so I’m going to throw this out despite all the misunderstanding and nasty responses it is sure to generate: this isn’t entirely analogous to getting dirty, messing up, learning one is not always Number One, and so on.</p>
<p>This is a major scholarship opportunity. Full tuition and fees and likely some other stuff. It is probably worth close to 40K per year, for four years. I don’t wish to speak for Dad II, and I recognize that it is entirely possible his pain is 100% due to hurt feelings, his own or vicariously for his daughter. But I wouldn’t die of shock if the response was not also in recognition that the “worst case” financial situation just might happen.</p>
<p>midmo. just realize this. you made 1377 posts on Cc but did not start one thread.</p>
<p>midmo,
I assumed that’s somewhere underneath all the layers of what Dad II is processing. Not saying that about Dad II in an accusatory way, but rather that it can be hard to untangle the spaghetti of feelings surrounding this process for his family. </p>
<p>If I have to spend a lot of money on something, I want to make sure I’m happy with what I’m getting.</p>
<p>it is not the worst case…the D has other options, and good ones, but dad doesn’t like “state” schools- not good enough</p>
<p>when you have in your brain only one option, one path, one way to succeed, one way of doing things without wanting to consider other choices, that doesn’t do anyone any good</p>
<p>Dad II, I am not nearly as courageous as you. I hate being a target, so I just pop in and spout and then disappear again.</p>
<p>However, I am starting to look for a college for my daughter (10th grader) so I just may have a question or two some time soon. Her search will be different than my son’s.</p>
<p>
I admire her self-restraint! :)</p>
<p>I think you could probably apply the “get a grip, use some perspective” admonition to two-thirds of the posts on the “Get it Off Your Chest” thread, but we don’t, because it was rightly intended as a safe place to just spout out some excess emotion and frustration. That’s kind of how I see most of Dad 2’s posts — he’s letting it all out there online and then he calms down. He just does it on his own thread instead of another. </p>
<p>I would like to know how many parents don’t, whether held in or expressed out loud, feel any of the hurt or disappointment that their kids experience due to setbacks and rejections. I don’t think too many completely distance themselves from those reactions any more than they divorce themselves from feeling elated and joyful when a huge accomplishment or prize is won.</p>
<p>Well that’s what I think jazzymom. This is a perfectly good use for an internet forum. It’s a great place to vent AND a great place to get perspective.</p>
<p>Jazzymom and bethie,
Yup. That’s what I meant about it being hard to untangle the spaghetti. At our house, we have no qualms about celebrating our kids’ accomplishments. (Usually with food…) For the disappointments, we try to roll with it, help the kids process and learn something from it, and sometimes marvel at how maturely they handle it. Soemtimes they handle it better than I do. Sometimes I have to help them learn to handle their dad’s reaction. I may not post about my struggles handling it, but I do feel the support from all of you in so many ways. If I can avoid dumping my own insecurities and garbage on my kids, well, then so much the better.</p>
<p>I got my son A LOT of sushi during the acceptance period.</p>
<p>Bethie,
Passover falls during the middle two weekends of April this year. We’ll be eating matzah (which, after eight days straight, makes us all grumpy). At the end, we’ll go out for pizza and scarf it down like we’ve been starving in the desert for 40 years. 
I wonder if DS will end our Passover seder by saying “Next year in ********!” (i.e., a college name!) It will be April 27th by then, so he’d better be close to a decision…</p>
<p>I think my son made his decision the last night before the deadline. We had just gotten back from final visits a day or two before.</p>
<p>The seder is one of my favorite times. We are not very observant, but one year my son thought he’d try the matzah thing to see what it was like. He caved pretty quickly when his Scholars Bowl coach brought in Krispy Kremes for everyone. But he never got grumpy!</p>
<p>BTW, DD got the acceptance letter from Vandy today.</p>
<p>Congratulations to your daughter, Dad II!. Is she going to visit for the MOSAIC program?</p>
<p>
</p>
<p>DadII, why such lack of enthusiasm? Now, you won’t have to spend a nickel on the lackluster safety. Should that not be a reason to celebrate?</p>
<p>xiggi, This acceptance comes w/o any merit $$. W/o merit $$, Vandy is out of our financial capability.</p>
<p>Are you not qualified for need based aide?</p>
<p>Of, yes, we do. our fafsa EFC is about 27K. Vandy’s COA is around 50K.</p>
<p>What about NMF award?</p>