When I’m home, I feel miserable, I’m anxious. My parent always yells at me and critics everything that I do.
He comments about my weight. He gives me look when he sees me eating.
I’m the main one responsible for cleaning the kitchen because according to him that’s what I’m supposed to do since I’m the child and he’s the adult. He still sees me as a child even though I’m a college senior and I’m over the age of 18.
It gets to the point where I have to seek refuge in my bedroom to escape him.
I decided that I don’t want to go even though I’ve already bought a bus ticket.
I’m afraid of his reaction to me not comming down. He’s already asking me for money as well.
I’m sorry you’re going through this. I’m sure other parents will chime in with good advice. In the meanwhile, I just want to say that I see you. Your pain is real. I’m rooting for you!
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Know that no one should make you feel this way. I am sorry you are having to figure out how to navigate complicated and painful family dynamics. You do not have to go. Do you have somewhere else to stay for the week? Some colleges allow kids to stay or if you are living off campus then you have that option.
If you go- Do you have anyone else in the area near home you can visit or stay with for a few of the nights to give yourself a break? Come up with ways to keep yourself in a positive mindset. Look on community webpages for free events going on at the library or organizations - maybe some yoga sessions. There might even be a volunteer opportunity for a few days.
After spring break find someone on campus to talk to about how he makes you feel. You need to nourish your body and take care of yourself. You should not be made to feel self conscious when eating. A counselor can help you process some of that and develop healthy coping strategies so you can thrive.
You can finish the semester strong!! Get support when you need it.
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Can u find a school friend to go home with ?
Otherwise it’s time for the imman adult, I love you but I won’t put up with you disrespecting me discussion. If you loved me you wouldn’t shame me.
Unfortunately most don’t change. See if u can find an internship or job this summer near school. Maybe research. Often you can rent a dorm room
Good luck.
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