<p>My son doesn't know yet - I looked up his roomate on Facebook. My son is straight. I know the argument would be: "Sexual orientation shouldn't matter any more than race or religion." Normally I agree, but not in this case. Being made to live in the same dormroom (which is, after all, a bedroom) with someone is attacted to your own sex would be similar to putting a male and a female together in the same dormroom. Comments are welcome.</p>
<p>I completely disagree. Roommates - indeed, floormates - often have brother/sister relationships (which aren’t always even cordial). It’s highly doubtful that your son’s roommate will be attracted to your son. Is your son on a single sex floor? If not, do you think it is okay for there to be girls on the floor? Also, have you spoken to your son about this? He may not even care. My advice is this: before you create issues between your son and his roommate, let your son have his own experiences. Perhaps the reason he doesn’t already know is because he doesn’t care.</p>
<p>I think this is less of a problem than you think it will be. I roomed with a gay person for a year with no problems. We continue to be very close friends. She never saw me as someone she would be romantically interested in because she knew I wasn’t interested in her in that way. Give your son’s roommate some credit until he demonstrates that he can’t handle the situation.</p>
<p>I had a gay roommate in college. I know some people now who have gay roomies of their gender.</p>
<p>This didn’t cause problems for me or the people I know. The gay roomies kepth their straight roomies in the friend zone.</p>
<p>H had a gay roomie in grad school. H’s roommate eventually asked h to move because roommate wanted to hold lots of gay only parties . I doubt that would happen with your son.</p>
<p>As an adult I’ve shared rooms on trips and at slumber parties with gay women. No awkwardness occurred.</p>
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<p>See, that’s where you’re wrong. Unless you think your son may have an interest in him ;)</p>
<p>My son was pretty sure his freshman roommate was gay and everything worked out just fine. Son had a girlfriend. They just have to learn to respect each other’s privacy.</p>
<p>OP said: “My son doesn’t know yet - I looked up his roomate on Facebook.”</p>
<p>two things:</p>
<p>1) how do you know he doesn’t know yet; my guess is he’s looked up already and doesn’t care </p>
<p>2) if it’s NOT a problem for your son, then it’s NOT a problem for you on behalf of your son</p>
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<p>Why is that?</p>
<p>S has a gay roommate this year. The roommate contacted him to tell him of his sexual orientation and if it would be a problem. I am so proud of my son - he told him that it definitely wouldn’t be a problem. They spoke for quite a while - learned that they had similar interests in sports and actually rooted for the same team. It may be a little awkward in the beginning for both of them, but I am (and my son isn’t) worried about this.</p>
<p>The new gay roommate is probably more nervous about the possibility of having to room with a straight guy. If your son is not homophobic, then do not worry about it. If he is homophobic, then it’s time he learn that all gay men are not sexual predators.</p>
<p>My first question is “why are you looking up your son’s roommate on Facebook?”</p>
<p>I found out that our straight daughter’s roommates are not lesbian. It didn’t cause any problems.</p>
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<p>No, it’s not the same. My D has lots of gay friends - in both college and from high school - and most of them have had straight room mates and it wasn’t a big deal. A gay guy isn’t going to waste his time hitting on his straight room mate. Instead, the gay room mate will introduce your son to his cute female friends, who will love him because he is open minded and secure enough in his own sexuality to room with a gay guy.</p>
<p>It wouldn’t strike my fancy personally to have a gay roommate, but it’s up to your son to decide, also you have no idea if his roommate is gay or not. Stop meddling in his affairs.</p>
<p>Are you concerned that this young man might attack your son? If not that, then what?</p>
<p>Being of any particular orientation doesn’t mean you are attracted to everyone of the relevant gender! Your son may not be his type at all and, in any case, it’s much more likely than not that the roommate has perfectly appropriate boundaries. I wouldn’t worry about it at all.</p>
<p>“the gay room mate will introduce your son to his cute female friends,”</p>
<p>EXACTLY how DD met her boyfriend.</p>
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That. Because, let me tell you, women love their gay male friends.</p>
<p>Buttercup, what are you really doing here? Your post just doesn’t ring true. It sounds more as if you want to kick up a board hornets’ nest than receive advice.</p>
<p>But just in case you are legitimate: 1. You aren’t supposed to be stalking your kid’s roommate on Facebook. 2. It’s none of your business whether your son’s roommate is gay or straight. 3. There’s nothing you can do about your son’s roommate in any case, because he’s your son’s roommate, not yours. 4. Your son is all grown up now. He’ll handle this as he sees fit.</p>
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Ok. I confess. I looked at D’s roommates Facebook. D showed it to me, so is that a teensy bit mitigating?</p>
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I’d say more than a teensy bit. It’s your d’s fb account, which implies to me that she has the right to share it with whomever she wants. My ds have periodically shown me pictures and videos from Facebook. My “stalking” comment to buttercup came from the fact that she looked her son’s roommate up on Facebook, and learned something about the roommate the son doesn’t yet know. So either the mom and the roommate are fb friends (which seems unlikely and would be a little … odd), or she’s on her son’s account looking up information about the roommate without her son being present. </p>
<p>If this situation is even what the OP purports it to be … I’m always suspicious of a first-time poster who just happens to jump in with a dilemma that includes a controversial issue.</p>
<p>Doesn’t seem controversial to me. There’s only one person on this entire thread who thinks it will be a problem, and that’s the OP.</p>