<p>Do any of you ever get tired of having to repeat the litany of reasons why your kid has to apply to SO many schools and why you are going to be missing SO much school, and most of all, why academic acceptance is so NOT that big of a deal because it's a piece of cake compared to getting into the program, and second to that, why your child is not considering community college even though it's such a great bargain and blah blah blah blah BLAH BLAH!!!!!</p>
<p>And then, once they get the picture, why even though yes it is "horrifying" as one person said to me, it is nevertheless, the way things are going to be, because your kid has NO interest in doing ANYTHING else and that is NOT going to change, and you know this in every pore of your being because you know your kid and if you didn't know this completely you would never have signed up for all of this in the first place, what, are you crazy or something?</p>
<p>And are you guys getting to where it's all just kind of a blur and you feel like calling the schools and just sayihg, "uh, so we are doing WHAT now?" because even with the folders and spreadsheets you kind of are just NUMB???</p>
<p>And plus your kid is getting sort of stressed and you have to figure out how to handle him or her in the best way possible while dealing with your own stess? Do they need hugs or a good stern "buck up and deal with this, it's what you have to do to get what you want" or do you give them sympathy or what?</p>
<p>it will all be over soon. The flip side is that your daughter might have been pursuing this dream without your support. Pat yourself on the back for backing her up in doing what she believes in. Many kids pursue their theater dreams without parental support, or give them up because of that lack.</p>
<p>There’s a thread over in the Parent’s Forum called “Smile and Nod.” You will do that alot! The crazy questions and even crazier looks won’t end after she is off at college so think of this as good prep for that </p>
<p>I think the best thing you can do at this point is make sure you are very organized with your spreadsheets and folders and CDs and calendars. It will make it easier knowing that you know when and where you need to be and what you need to bring. If it is all getting to be a blur, take a step back and just realize that, as long as your D has a great safety school ready to go, then she will end up in a program studying what she loves. And isn’t THAT what this is all about.</p>
<p>The stress on the kids is a tough thing. I remember the string of rejections my D got last spring. I think she got 7 in a row - talk about stress and high emotions. But I made sure to tell her that I had faith in her and that I knew that she had the strength and the determination to get through the rough spots and go on to pursue her chosen career path. It wasn’t that she didn’t have any acceptances at that point - it was that she questioned whether or not she was “good enough” since so many schools turned her down. That “am I good enough” question came up here several times from other students as well. But reminding them that they have dealt with rejection before and that it IS a part of the life they have chosen can help. Be empathetic but positive! </p>
<p>As SDonCC said, it will be over soon. And this time next year YOU will be on CC reassuring parents of high school seniors that there is light at the end of the tunnel and it isn’t a train but a very bright spotlight! Best of luck to you and break legs to your D!</p>
<p>Snapdragonfly- My husband, while writing the Christmas letter, felt a need to include a the whole list of schools D is applying to! I made him cut it out because I know it looks crazy. He is telling almost everyone that D has applied to “too many schools.” Well, one just doesn’t know how it’s going to turn out until April 1 and we have all done the best we could do with the knowledge that we have. Sometimes I think the fear gathered from CC posts has driven us to the too many auditions but I’d rather have erred on the too many auditions side than the too few auditions due to blissful ignorance about the competition out there, especially for girls.
Since the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree, I know you can act. So this is where we all must be Mary Poppins and unflappable in front of our student. Thankfully we have CC where we can flap!
I hope I run into you in the next round of auditions. We are traveling every weekend this month! Hugs to all!
(Don’t let the horse know you’re scared, don’t let the horse know you’re scared, don’t let the horse…)</p>
<p>And of top of that, we had a younger daugher (middle in the line up) who on a good day exhibits middle child syndrome. I felt like the entire year I lived with a more vocal Jan Brady (Marsha, Marsha, Marsha)!</p>
<p>Plan a spa day for you and your daughter after all this craziness is over. My D and I went out for massages and mani/pedis after auditions were over and had a great time. Waiting for results is hard, but at least your D will know that there is nothing more she can do. It is up to the fates.</p>
<p>Plus, if you’re going to Unifieds - plan something fun while you’re there. We went to see Second City while we were in Chicago (or you could take in a Broadway show in NY). It was great to get out of the hotel (which is swarming with stressed out kids and parents) and just have fun.</p>
<p>We received a call from my son’s principal asking why he was not taking calculus his senior year. I tried to explain that he was opting to take music theory and piano instead of an advanced math class. She argued with me forever saying that if he wanted to get into a good college he would need to have calculus eventhough he already took 4 years of regents math! We polietly declined. He is soo thankful he was able to take theory and piano. I guess some people just don’t undersatnd a BFA degree.</p>
<p>In addition to being your child’s personal executive assistant, the best thing you can do is be a warm hug and a soft place to fall as your child goes through this process!!! And enjoy the travels- it is a special bonding time those “other” normal parents won’t get that you will look back fondly on when your child flees the nest for the next part of the journey. Carpe Diem and safe travels!!!</p>
<p>Yep…my D’s graduation was at the large convocation center for the local university and for every graduating senior they flashed their picture and colleges accepted on the jumbo-tron…WELL, of course we had about 8 college acceptances (academically). Afterwards, my neighbor, who also had a graduating senior, saw me and said "How many colleges did your D apply to??? I then had to go into the auditioning thing, and then you have to explain that for every college auditioned for, anywhere from 300-1000 audition for maybe 10-12 spots. THEN they get the idea! So just hang in their snapdragonfly, it WILL end! Your D will end up in the place she is meant to be. And she is very lucky to have the support of you! Good luck and keep us all posted! And also remind her that rejections will come…it’s the nature of this crazy process.</p>
<p>Fun times, eh? Add to that the fact that my kid is National Merit…well, it’s assumed that she’s a shoo in at any college (and academically, it’s nice not to have to sweat that part of the picture, and we do appreciate every merit $$ offered…now on to the artistic acceptances). I get sick of “oh, she’s soooo talented, of course she’ll get in anywhere she wants to go.” Um…when you’re looking at an admit ratio of 2-8%, and every kid in that room is also very talented… </p>
<p>We have 2 analogies we use in explanation, depending on the audience (and I want credit for these – footnotes, please One is the elite sports recruitment analogy – if you’re the best football quarterback in the nation, but the school you want to attend is recruiting linebackers…you’d better have another school in the mix. The other is the story of the “purple dress” – Say you’re going dress shopping for a party. You want a blue dress, because you have blue heels and a great purse to go with it. In the store, you see a gorgeous purple dress…nothing’s wrong with this dress, and it will be perfect for someone else…but you need the blue dress. As kiddo says, "sometimes you’re the blue dress (and get that artistic admit!) sometimes you’re the purple one (and have to file that guaranteed academic free ride in the round file, because you weren’t the artistic fit for that class). There’s NOTHING wrong with the quarterback or the purple dress, they just need the right fit.</p>
<p>Depending on my mood (or intestinal fortitude for the day) I sometimes share the terrifying numbers with people, or just smile and say “stay tuned – we’ll let you know in May.” Then I change the subject! That seems to be best for the “outsiders”. How about “Does she have a favorite school?” The one that accepts her and gives her enough money to attend. Really – would a kid apply and spend all the time and $$ that involves for a school they would not consider attending? Yep…the quiet, calm mysterious one – that’s me (I come here to vent!) The mantra? “Thanks for asking. Stay tuned – we’ll let you know in May.”</p>
<p>Sigh…me too. I had to go to lunch with austinmtmom to get a pep talk last week. (At least I have someone to vent to that understands!) It is getting so frustrating to see all the letters of acceptance, with money offers, academically, only to get a “no thanks” letter behind it. Last weekend I read all the rejection/acceptance threads just to get a “feel” for how some seasons went…well, that may not have helped. Yes, lots of kids finally went somewhere. There is no rhyme or reason as to how acceptances went. And, finally, there a some kids that just don’t land anywhere. Scares me to death.</p>
<p>I thought we had prepared well, but maybe it doesn’t matter that much? We are half way through the 13 schools she applied to. Gosh, I gotta remember…don’t let the horse know…</p>
<p>I agree with Austin…the questions and cross-eyed looks don’t end even when your child is in their MT program. And yes, I DO remember feeling so tired of explaining it to people (and watching their eyes glaze over at the long-ish explanation I had to give.) Good choice to just say “I’ll let you know in May.” I always said to people it is amazing how hard you have to work to get into this crazy major that almost guarantees no money (!) </p>
<p>And as some others said, if they are a good student on top of it…look out! Even DS’s college didn’t understand (the Math prof said something about what was a kid with a 680 SAT math doing in MT? Sigh.) </p>
<p>But I also do say to people, “thank God he knows what he wants to do FOR SURE.” Community college, state flagship is no more of a bargain if their Johnny needs six years to get through because he can’t land on a major and hates his job when he’s done.</p>
<p>Nowadays, I get the question…why CAN’T he get a job on campus, why CAN’T he come home on the weekend, why DOES he need an iron/board? Your kid’s college experience will be so different from everyone else’s…don’t try to explain. Just smile and nod.</p>
<p>We happily joke that “Yes, D is going to a $50,000 a year summer camp. Last semester she learned to tie knots and use a staple gun (in stagecraft)!” </p>
<p>Get used to it - no one understands BFAs (or even BA MTs) but other BFAs. Just be content with the knowledge that your child is following his/her passion and something (hopefully steady employment) will come out of it in the end.</p>
<p>You are all wonderful and I (who will be tearing my hair out next year) am hoping that your kids get into the great schools they deserve. They are lucky to have such caring parents. Keep the faith!!!</p>
<p>awww…
(psst…don’t tell anyone, but it’s also kinda fun. and sometimes you sneak in quality time while you’re traveling with your kid, and meet lots of other nice parents. that’s only for you to know! :))</p>
<p>Thank you for all the great posts, it’s wonderful to know I am not alone!! We are all indeed kindred spirits.
The angst, stress, disappointment…hopefully ending in excitement.
The stress level in my house is really thick right now and we are all trying to access our senses of humor. :)</p>
<p>On another note: my daughter is auditioning for Syracuse and Ithaca (Jan 21 & 22) and I was hoping to connect with another parent to ride share between the two. If anyone is in the same boat, let me know!</p>
<p>Take care - I have to believe they all end up where they are supposed to (or as someone said where they are accepted and get $$) and there surely is light at the end of the tunnel!!??</p>
<p>I have similar issues, but as a student, not a parent. As a senior in high school, adults and other kids I know are CONSTANTLY asking me where I’m going to college, what I’m going to major in, etc. When I say I want to go for musical theatre, and tell them that I’ve applied to 6 MT schools and 6 academic schools, they freak out and ask me what my back up plan is. They say “Well, what are you going to do when you can’t make a career out of it? Surely you’re going to double major? You’re not going to a CONSERVATORY are you??? You are MUCH too smart to have to go to school for the arts. You should be a doctor or a lawyer! …what do your parents think about that?” It just tests my patience. People are so ignorant. I don’t harrass them about their choice of major, or act like I have far superior knowledge in regard to the career path they are choosing. A couple times I’ve found myself just saying that I was undecided about a major and had applied to 12 schools. It’s very frustrating.</p>
<p>And I also get the line “Oh, you’re great, you’ll get in anywhere you audition.” I know that they mean well, but they just don’t understand the odds. There was a girl from my school last year that auditioned for 7 MT programs and was admitted to one. I was stoked for her and she was super excited. Non-MT people were like “wow, she must be bad…she only got into ONE of the schools she auditioned for!” They just don’t know…</p>
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