<p>Thanks sylvan. There is no shortage of people in the world who can make light of a very serious problem. Within the last 48 hours, two students have taken their lives, at two different universities. Both were Honors Students and brilliant. Both were quiet and unassuming types. Both showed no signs of disturbance before. Both snapped under pressure. Whether its pressure from inside your heart/mind, from your parents, your peers, your school, society…please, please, please take it in stride, be kind to yourself and to others, learn to love and laugh as much as you sit in a classroom and learn. Its okay if you aren’t perfect. Follow your dreams, but keep your ambitions and expectations in check. Allow for booboos and mistakes. Be responsible but also learn to have fun and relax. </p>
<p>Your self worth far exceeds anything you will learn in class. Not shorting anything about learning in class or academics…we are very accomplished professionals and have smart kids. I am just saying, your worth as a person is not based on credentials. or money.</p>
<p>and thanks Fishy and Levirm. I appreciate your support. For the record, its not a personal loss, but it was close enough to shake me and my kid. And in general terms, I have seen this movie before all too often. Sometimes its horrific and results in death. Sometimes its another form of tragedy…a crash and burn in college…leading to alcoholism or drug abuse. And sometimes, sadly, it results in abuse from parents…verbal and emotional abuse for not “measuring up to expectations.” </p>
<p>Its sickening. Parents who use kids like trophies on the mantel. Sick. (Not saying that is what happened to the families in the last 48 hours, only a general observation).</p>
<p>There is nothing wrong with healthy ambition and excellence. But it must be kept in check. </p>
<p>Hug your friends today, with particular emphasis on those who may be struggling with internal demons, or loneliness or whatever.</p>
<p>Seeing someone close to me getting stressed to a threatening degree over this kind of thing, your post hit home. Thank you, I’ll be sure to pass it on.</p>
<p>The pressure to succeed in top schools is often unbearable. I have been on both the MIT campus and Cornell during exam time and the pressure could be cut with a knife. I have often wondered about my own kids when they are under this kind of stress. Is it worth it? Will it make a difference in how they live their lives? Is it hurting them? I don’t know the answer to this craze of college hype but I admire those people who understand that it may not be for them.</p>
<p>We are approaching that time of year when kids from all over the country are sending their applications to these pressure cooker schools and so many times I wish I could say “Are you sure you know what you are getting into to?” </p>
<p>OP, it sounds like you have just experienced a shaking experience and I hope you are doing OK. There is nothing in this world that matters more than the health and happiness of our kids and when we see them get wrapped up in the top school success attitude and all that it brings we need to remind them that they are wonderful and amazingly special because they are our kids not because they do well in school. I hope your thread stays on the boards all through the admissions process this year to offer a reminder that parents and children need to have some perspective regarding success. There is nothing better than seeing a happy kid and it does not matter where they attend school. As adults we have all been around people who just radiate joy and most of us would rather be around that type of person than the workaholic drone. </p>
<p>The need to get into the top schools or pressure cooker environments is not for most people and I agree that parents need to know whether their children should apply to these schools.</p>
<p>Hugs to you OP because I can hear your pain. You are sending a wake up call to so many and I know you will have people thinking.</p>
<p>I am posting again on this thread, mainly to bring it to the first page so more can read this important message. And I will tell you all what I have told both of my children, you are a unique and wonderfully talented individual. Do not let yourself be defined by a number. You are not your GPA or your SAT score or your ACT score, you are so much more than a number. Have faith that you will end up where you belong and most importantly, bloom where you are planted!</p>
<p>Ok. So maybe you dont like my nick name, or whatever, but i did coment on the topic. I said I think its good to have some pressure or else you get lazy. Its true. If you sit around all the time and your parents dont make you do anything its not good. And some parents are crazy and make their kids do too much studying and sports. I think its the parents fault if they make you feel bad cause you arent smart enough. </p>
<p>And fb isnt cool any more. My mom like farmville and goes on all the time. And theres plenty of things talked about here that arent 100% related to college, ummm like the parents forum where they talk about all kinds of stuff. I dont know why theres so many mean people here. Its like theres so many people who are trying to be smarter than everyone else. Check yourself.</p>
<p>Kollegekid1…Please stop posting on the parent forum. If you must post keep it on the highschool thread. I don’t know how old you are but your post are very inappropriate. If you have not noticed you are disturbing many people on several of the threads that you are appearing on. Can’t you find something else to do like warch tv or play outside…or go read a book. You have plenty of time to come back to CC when you are a jr in highschool.</p>
<p>Maybe parents should keep their posts in the parent forum also.Im trying to be helpful and find stuff out. I never said anything mean to other people, but there shure are alot of rude people here. I think its very inapropriate to bother people here for no reason and isn’t it against the rules here. All I asked about was getting a dog in the parent forum. If you find that offensive… All i’ll say is im glad you arent my mom.</p>
<p>Everytime my Dad, Grand Parents and other family ask about my application I jokingly tell them, “Well, actually, I sorta dropped. Schools not my thing.”</p>
<p>Most have got it by now. It’s still frustrating even without outside pressure, though.</p>
<p>The videos where marines in Iraq ghost ride the whip a hummer are the funniest.
Also, I think this is the wrong forum… college life means mostly college kids and kids who already got into college here</p>
<p>Totally agree. TOTALLY. So, so, so, so, so, so, so true. This whole business of ranking schools is, as far as I’m concerned, utter horsesh**t. Find a school you love and go there. If that school is Stanford, great, go to Stanford. But if it’s a community college in North Dakota, don’t think you have to go to Stanford to be successful in life! You will always, always, ALWAYS do better if you’re happy where you are. Period. Without exception. College is NOT about learning lots of facts, it’s about becoming an adult and learning how to think, and the absolute most important thing is that you find the right place for YOU. Harvard University is no better a place to do that than, say, Lenoir-Rhyne University. It’s ridiculous to even think about college in terms of how “good” the education is, because that’s both subjective and irrelevant.
Go where you fit. You’ll do great.</p>