<p>I just dropped out of the UC system and I'm still feeling pretty bad about it. Mind you, I'm not dropping out of college - I'm just transferring to a Cal State. What's worse, I did it for no particularly good reason. I was doing well enough, but I didn't feel "home" home when I lived off-campus. I never really had close enough friends there, so I kept rooming with strangers - hence the feeling of not being "home" home. In short: fear of dealing with new roommates is mainly what's keeping me from going back to UC.</p>
<p>Now I feel like a failure because I'm going to graduate from a Cal State instead from a UC. In high school I was the one getting all A's, and now I'm going to a college that is pretty much unknown. I know that's pretty shallow, but that's the way it is. I'm also starting to become sensitive every time someone mentions "the UC system." I know I have myself to blame, but I just need to get this off my chest.</p>
<p>Oh, man. I hate when there is some combination of words that just sends you into a tail-spin, but you can't get away from them popping up randomly on a daily basis. Like I feel nauseated by the VTech shootings, but every time I come here to research something, those threads...I'm like a moth drawn to the illness-inducing flame. I suggest that you don't come here and make yourself suffer at the sight of all the damned UC threads! </p>
<p>I don't think all your hard work was for nothing. Keep in mind that the rat race isn't what it's about--you got something out of it. That's the point of it. The glory of some name brand is a superficial shell of a reason to do anything. It's hard to let that go after it being your goal for so long though...
But maybe this is how you have to learn that lesson, you know? Events like this are what force people to reexamine their unexamined value system. What about all those moron sheep who keep up with that kind of shell of an existence their whole lives--always keeping up appearances, always chasing a carrot that's really just some plastic fake carrot other people decided was the definition of what status and happiness is--and they don't see the light and have regrets 'til they're old?</p>
<p>UC wasn't right for you. Maybe the problem isn't YOU--it's people always trying to define how other people should live by some asinine measurements. Don't let anything hold that much power over you just because it's socially or institutionally sanctioned. </p>
<p>I remember reading an article about someone's mom wanting her daughter to go where she felt most comfortable--til the daughter got into an unnamed prestigious school. Then what do you think mom did? Pushed her and pushed her to go to the "top" school. Luckily, in the end, the girl was strong enough to tell her mom to back off, because she wanted to go where she was most comfortable--not a well-known place. She was happier there. More comfortable. I'll try to find that article if I can. It's not a failure on your part--you didn't live up to a FALSE value system you internalized.</p>
<p>You don't need the diploma to know you are smart enough to get into your old college. You did that. Why do you need the badge? You know you're good enough!</p>
<p>I don't want to talk about myself too much if you want to get stuff of your chest, but if this helps you, I just remembered how after I got dismissed from Rutgers, I kinda felt the way you do about having to hear the school name. I had a high GPA for 2 solid years, Dean's List and Honors clubs and all that nonsense--then it took a nose dive. One term GPA below 2.0. Boom. Probation. Boom. Dismissal.</p>
<p>It was so shattering and I was so depressed (I was also depressed in the first place) that all I could think to do that first week to lift my mood was to tune into Conan and hope laughing would distract me for awhile. It seemed to take all my strength just to turn on the TV to hopefully feel better. He did that sketch where he holds up a fake magazine ad, and one was for a little-known NJ college where the less hard-working kids in my HS went: "Fairleigh Dickinson University. You've never heard of Fairleigh-Dickinson? Well you will, when you fail out of Rutgers." Got a decent laugh. I felt like I got roundhouse-kicked in the chest; I turned off the TV, rolled over in bed for god knows how long--maybe days?, and stopped watching Conan for months. Seriously.</p>
<p>Yeah, I hated hearing "Rutgers" for awhile there. And Rutgers College isn't even as "good" as UC. But seriously, I wasn't happy there during my grade-plunge. I was in denial. It wasn't right for you, and there's no shame in trying to adapt when you aren't happy somewhere. I wish I had transfered somewhere else before the depression got a hold of me. SEE--you could have ended up like me! Oh noz!</p>
<p>Yeah, I know it'll take some time. Actually I was over it a week ago, but last night I suddenly wish I could stay at UC because I'm so close to graduation. I didn't explicitly state it, but other factors (<em>coughlikeeconomiccough</em>) were also involved. I think I'm gonna really miss the research-based environment of UC though. A bio major and all.</p>
<p>But come, shower me with more sympathy! I'll need it!</p>
<p>i think i understand where ur coming from.. i'm transfering from a cc this fall, but up until now i heard "UC" and entered depression mode.<em>cries</em> but look forward, not back! i hope ur more comfortable where u are now but if the name value really bothers u, u can always go to a great grad school =)</p>
<p>CSU's are great schools and nothing to be ashamed about AT ALL in my opinion. ALL of my friends are going to state schools and they have accomplished a lot. It'll be a different environment--going from a research school and all. That could be great for you since you weren't happy at the UC anyway.</p>
<p>I sure hope you're a girl banana because if not, you're just about the biggest male crybaby I've seen on this board. I'll give you a pass if you're a girl because girls get all emotional and stuff. </p>
<p>In your grief, however, you're disparaging the Cal State system as a whole and I don't think that type of attitude will serve you well in the future. People in the workplace in general don't take too well with this type of negativity and I suggest you grow up a little bit and face reality. You're at a Cal State now so just toughen up and live with it. That's the way to handle things like this, look ahead not backwards. It was your choice to got to a Cal State.</p>
<p>Look the point is that your almost done with your miserable college experience and I have a little more than two years to undergo this rather difficult and quite frankly unamusing process.</p>
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I sure hope you're a girl banana because if not, you're just about the biggest male crybaby I've seen on this board. I'll give you a pass if you're a girl because girls get all emotional and stuff.
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<p>I sure hope you're a boy Gravitas because if not, you're just about the biggest Republican-sounding female I've seen on this board. I'll give you a pass if you're a boy because boys get all insensitive and stuff.</p>
<p>Er, or something like that.</p>
<p>Thanks for perpetuating the gender stereotypes, by the way. Now I know how nonjudgmental a college-bound student can be.</p>
<p>It would've been nice if you noticed the part where I sort of implied transferring to CSU wasn't really a "choice," but I guess I'll just take your advice to toughen up and and live with it. Kthxbai.</p>
<p>I would like to nominate Gravitas3 for this years college confidential biggest douche in the universe award. Your post was very douche-like and I think it will earn you first prize this year. Congratulations Gravitas3, you've earned it!</p>
<p>Either way, look at it like this: You're in California. California is the best state. It's awesome. Employers will see you went to UC and CSU and if you keep your gpa up, it'll look great. Stop worrying, you'll be fine! Get off the internet and watch Office Space or Shaun of the Dead.</p>
<p>Anyway, I'm really over it now. Thanks for the encouragement and the kind words - I really did need them. Now I will get off the Internet, pat myself on the back, and talk to my own reflection about how awesome I am.</p>
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I'm just transferring to a Cal State. What's worse, I did it for no particularly good reason. I was doing well enough, but I didn't feel "home" home when I lived off-campus. I never really had close enough friends there, so I kept rooming with strangers - hence the feeling of not being "home" home. In short: fear of dealing with new roommates is mainly what's keeping me from going back to UC.
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<p>I may have misunderstood but that looks like a choice to me. </p>
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but I guess I'll just take your advice to toughen up and and live with it.
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<p>If that’s what comes from all this, then it’s all good.</p>