I’m considering quitting band

Hello. I’m only a freshman in high school, so I might not have a lot of experience yet, however I feel like my enjoyment from concert band is deteriorating. I have been playing the trumpet since 7th grade and my range is very wide, but I have rhythmic issues. I’m in all Honors classes (which is basically preparing for AP classes during my junior year) and have a GPA higher than 3.75, being in Geometry already as I passed Algebra 1 last year. In band I have terrible rhythmic abilities and I sometimes have trouble in even the more basic warm-ups. I do tap my foot and count (which is one of the major factors in my unpleasant experience) but I’m still making mistakes. My band director offers free private lessons which we need to attend 4 every 1/4 of the year. I play 2nd trumpet in songs which I’m totally fine with, but I just feel like I don’t enjoy band as much as I used to. My band director has a fair level of expectations for everyone and I continued to make failed attempts on rhythm pieces. People say it gets better and how I should stay for a year to experience it, however I feel as if I’m not good enough. I keep forgetting to bring my trumpet and music home to practice (which my parents bought my instrument a year ago) and I don’t think I can complete the four lessons. I am also in marching band which I do like a lot and some people there aren’t even in anything else. I’m afraid of leaving because I don’t want to disappoint or cause a grudge with my director and friends. I have considered leaving before I posted this since I couldn’t keep up. My desired major in college doesn’t even associate with music at all (it being Health Science). NOTE: Band is an EC at my school, with engineering, grammar, art fundamentals, and theatre arts (I joined the same in middle school and thought the plot was too childish [you might think I’m narcissistic from that but it was really boring]). I’m involved with Student Council, World of Difference, and marching band. I don’t play any sports (nor do I want to) though. What should I do? (FYI: My trumpet section has 19 players)

Heyo there! In my opinion, might be one of two:

  1. You have a burn out and you need to take a break from playing, rather than quitting completely. Just take a break, do your own business, hang out with friends, enjoy some free time, listen to some music and maybe you will find something new - directions, instruments, etc. I'm not sure about your sense of the rhythm. You might want to take some lessons or practice after the break.
  2. You have new priorities which means your subconscious mind "puts" playing far behind now which means you're not gonna enjoy it as much as you used to. Again, the problem might be not in music itself but also in instrument, genres, etc.

I’m in very close relationships with music and, basically, 70% of my day consists of some music on the background. I have numerous playlist for literally every mood and type of activity. Besides, i play guitar when i feel like it. Just for myself or really close friends. It gives me some connection to my beloved musical compositions.

I don’t think you should quit playing. Taking a break to deal with yourself seems like a good option for now.

If you aren’t going to be a music or fine arts major, don’t feel guilty. Quitting band doesn’t have to mean quitting your instrument. It may be too late to quit a class this far into the school year, so you should take that up with your GC. For next year, think about what you’d like to do instead of that class, and give that new endeavor your best effort. And if you want out of band, but still want to play your instrument, you’ll find plenty of opportunities from casual school music clubs to church ensembles to self-study to mini concerts at nursing homes to community bands that meet for a short time and specific purpose each year such as an Independence Day parade.

My DD quit band for a new opportunity better suited to her interests and her potential career. She had a lot of friends in band and they were sorry to see her quit, but they’re still her good friends. She sees some of them in other clubs, and some she still meets up with outside of school. They didn’t drop out of her life, but it does take both sides making an effort to stay in touch. I think most of them were genuinely happy to see her take advantage of a challenging and exciting-for-her opportunity. DD felt guilty for leaving at first, but she was ultimately happy with her choice and over it within a week or so. Now she enjoys hearing about their HS band experiences (and is quite glad not to have to sit and play through rainy football games).

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I think you are giving up band because you don’t feel as competent as the others. Another thing you could do is take private lessons to catch you up.

Do you enjoy the social aspects of band? Making friends? Marching band?