I’m starting to really hate my college options

@Almostout2k19, my daughter has higher stats than you and a couple of significant accomplishments, and she was not accepted into honors at penn state- in fact, she was accepted into their 2+2- and there was NO way we could afford for her to go at all. Luckily she had many other acceptances, some at schools that have much lower acceptance rates (and are objectively better to her), and much better aid. Honestly, your stats guarantee you nothing. No ones stats guarantee them anything, even people who have perfect everything. That’s the name of this game, period.

No one until post #99 suggested the obvious - community college. Not sure how it is on the East Coast, but on the West Coast there are tons of people who have stellar scores who opt for CC in order to get second chances at applying to their dream school, or in some cases, even 3 chances. Plus you save a ton of money.

Considering the variety of schools that you applied to, and your discontent with all of them - do you think that maybe you’re just not ready for college right now? I totally understand wanting to go somewhere that feels right, but if your research into schools this year left you with nothing you liked enough to TRY this fall (in multiple acceptances), maybe this isn’t where your heart and mind are right now.

It’s cliche but it’s true, college is largely what YOU make of it. It’s not so much about the school.

Those kids you’re currently in school with, judging others as below them, they’re not your friends. You don’t need their approval to have a good college career.

OP, I’m wondering what your parents think of your choices and attitude. Do they think you “deserve” better than the schools that were on your (well-balanced) list? I’m just not sure why you are so confident that you deserve admittance to “better” schools because you sound like you have a very exaggerated sense of your accomplishments and self-importance.

I have 2 kids and if either one of them acted even a fraction as entitled as you are coming across in this thread, I would have exactly no patience for them and require that they take a gap year to get some experience in the real world (paying rent, working 40+ hours/week, learning about self-sufficiency, gaining perspective on their own place in the world) and only then we could talk about whether I was still willing to help them out with paying for schools to which they were admitted and well-suited.

@MYOS1634, you wrote, “You could also try and study abroad at a high school in Costa Rica, Spain, France, Germany, Japan…” I’m interested to know more about this. Are there special programs in these particular countries? Is doing this a real option for students who have already graduated from a US high school, like the OP? I am completely naïve about the whole concept, and now very curious. It isn’t clear whether the OP noticed your suggestion, but I think it was a very interesting contribution to this thread. Thank you in advance for any additional details.

Yes, YFU, AFS, or CIEE are some well-established ones. The student has to know some of the language and gets immersed in a totally different culture. They attend school abroad as if they were a native student, have to get used to the school system, and come back bilingual/bicultural, having achieved tremendous growth. It’s a recognized, rigorous gap year system - but it’s selective so not a shoe in for all who apply. (The selectivity and ability to ‘survive’ the year are also reasons why it’s looked upon favorably by colleges).

Those programs can also be very expensive, unless you do something like CBYX. $30k+ for year-long programs.

I’m the parent of a kid who chose the school she hated the least. She was full of shame about where she was going to attend.

She was, in fact, pretty miserable most of freshman year. It wasn’t until she had an apartment lined up for sophomore year, got us to agree to let her take the car back to school with her, and figured out she was going to miss her friends over the summer that things began to turn around.

She is VERY happy now. She has done a fantastic job of taking advantage of opportunities that have crossed her path. She has built a life for herself at that school and in that city. She rarely comes home now. Graduates next year!

Really, it was her and the thoughts zooming around in her head, and the meaning she attached to those thoughts. It was definitely NOT the school.

Life is going to throw all kinds of stuff at you. You have to learn to make the best of whatever is getting tossed your way, or you’re going to be really, really unhappy a lot of the time.

JMO. Good luck, OP!

I guess I’m just not enthusiastic about college in general, but it’s something that has to be done. It’s just 4 years and my family would cut me off if I didn’t attend. They aren’t too thrilled about a gap year after I asked yesterday. Penn State is one of the cheapest, so we’re going to try to schedule another tour. My cousins want to tell me more about Mount Holyoke since they attended. After researching last night they seem like my best options.

Aimed higher than the schools I already knew and applied to. If I knew about more LACs even higher ranked ones, I would’ve applied. With the subjective nature of college admissions, I could’ve at least had a shot. My SATs don’t discount me from them. My essay was pretty good, my recommendations were good. I would’ve made out with more options.

@Almostout2k19

It seems you have some options (assuming your parents are on board)

  1. Gap year, interesting activities (Google to see what you can do), maybe re-take SAT’s, apply to schools again.
  2. Gap year, as above, but see if you can accept one or two of the schools you were admitted to under deferred admission so if your second attempt yields nothing interesting at least you have a place to go. https://www.gooverseas.com/blog/why-and-how-to-defer-college-acceptance-for-a-gap-year
  3. Attend one of the schools you were admitted to, knock it out of the park, and if you don’t like it, apply for a transfer. If you are ALL about small LAC’s then compile a list of where you might want to apply. Remember in the vast majority of cases, LAC are not near exciting cities, etc. I’d say if you did really well at Mount Holyoke it would be an easier transfer for a higher-tier LAC. Maybe the time at Mt. Holyoke will give you a fresh sense of things and help you get perspective.

Also, FWIW, some of the best philosophy departments are at Catholic schools and the intellectual integrity of a Jesuit education is quite well-regarded. Lots of very smart students at Fordham and you are near NYC. Remember, small LAC is often does not mean close to vibrant city. There are some, but not many. http://www.thecollegesolution.com/33-liberal-arts-colleges-in-or-near-cities/

@Almostout2k19 - This whole college application is incredibly complex and I really feel for the kids trying to navigate and understand the process in order to make a wise decision.

My DD was accepted to Shreyer’s. She has a friend that is a freshmen and she absolutely loves it. The alumni network is one of the best and the Honors housing is supposed to be situated in an ideal location. We would have loved to look into it further, but we had to eliminate PSU because it was just too expensive for our budget.

You were admitted to Schreyer Honors College at Penn State? Go there. You will be treated like an elite student, with special privileges. Schreyer makes a big school small. Also, in-state tuition. Use any left-over money for grad school.

@Theoden , I was under the impression that if you defer an acceptance for a year you commit to that place after that year. That means you can’t accept more than one, and you can’t apply to other colleges while holding that place. Certainly that’s how my daughter’s school works its deferrals, and from CC i got the impression that was the general convention.

@CardinalBobcat - It might not be too late for the OP to arrange a semester or year abroad with https://afs.org/ or https://yfu.org/ There also are other year and semester exchange programs as well as language schools that offer home-stays. Here is one place to start looking: https://www.iie.org/en/Programs

@Almostout2k19 - If you do take a gap year, consider Bryn Mawr. It is closer to a city than Mt. Holyoke.

My student is currently attending Mount Holyoke majoring in Bio. She was admitted on a merit scholarship. She also had amazing stats NMF, 36 ACT, 1520 SAT and high GPA. Her high school was also very high achieving (3 out of 330 attended Harvard her year). She applied to some of the same schools you did and got in along with applying to Barnard and not getting in. Luckily she fell in love with Mount Holyoke upon visiting and is really enjoying her time there. Don’t be fooled into thinking the students are not as high achieving as your high school classmates that are going to the Ivy’s. Many of the students were accepted to them and choose Mount Holyoke. Also be proud of your acceptance. They have changed from admitting 51% to I believe 36% this year. Look at the statistics of the students that are there. If you get a chance, visit. I am always impressed when we visit campus and see what the students there are working on.

+1 on thinking you should be more proud of yourself than you are for the acceptances you got. Mount Holyoke is great and it is prestigious. Yeah, okay, fine…it’s not in the Ivy League. But it is tied for #30 in US News and World Report, if one cares about prestige and rankings.

My (junior) daughter is very interested in several schools with similar rankings, particularly Oberlin, Kenyon, and Skidmore. If next year at this time, she has an acceptance letter from any one of these schools, I will be grinning from ear to ear. I will be tempted to wear swag from that school every single day. I would write that tuition check with JOY and never look back. I hope you can work yourself up to a similar level of enthusiasm! Mount Holyoke is a gorgeous school and has so many opportunities!

@almostout2k19 you said you’re not that enthusiastic about going to college in general, but you guess it’s something that needs to be done. Do you really mean this? Why do you think you aren’t enthusiastic about college in general? What would you rather be doing?

“Penn State is one of the cheapest, so we’re going to try to schedule another tour. My cousins want to tell me more about Mount Holyoke since they attended. After researching last night they seem like my best options.”

These are both very good options.

@Almostout2k19 Your stats are very good. They are well above average for all US high school kids. However, they are “very good university” (such as Penn State and Mount Holyoke) good. They are not stats that will impress Harvard, Stanford, Bowdoin, or Amherst College. I know several students who had higher stats, and went to schools that are very much on the same level as Penn State and Mount Holyoke and who are very happy and doing very well.

You can get a very good education at Mount Holyoke or Penn State. You will find students at either of these schools who came in with higher stats than you and a few with lower stats that you. You will find great professors and challenging classes at either of these schools. If you do very well at either of these schools, then you will open up a lot of opportunities for yourself. If you attend either of these schools, then you will be surrounded by students who like the school a lot, and any naysayers that you might have known in high school will be somewhere else.