I messed up...big time....what are my choices?! I'm having a Berkeley Breakdown..please help!!!

Colleges & Universities A-Z University of California - Berkeley
1

Hello everyone,

I am a transfer that is currently taking 17 units for my second semester here (also spent summer here), and am so overwhelmed.

The simplest way to put it is that I feel is extremely depressed with adjusting to the city, and the rigor of the classes, as it is such a shock and contrast compared to what I was used to. It’s so bad that my energy level has gotten to the point where I can barely get out of bed. In the past, I was used to participating in lectures, and over here it’s so hard for me because everyone REALLY, REALLY seems to know what they’re talking about. Everyone is very passionate about what they are studying and extremely motivated in communicating their questions, opinions, and general commentary to the larger audience. I feel like I don’t belong.

Regardless, I had a 40 page paper due for a class this Thursday, and for some reason I just did not turn it in. I am having serious anxiety right now and have been up for literally 3 days in complete shock, unable to muster up the courage to finish up the paper at all. I literally am having anxiety attacks at least once a day, and I hate that I know it is because of this paper.

He says he takes off 10% for each it is turned in late…I haven’t even turned it in yet…it’s been 3 days.

I’ve spent the past few days in a complete daze…wondering what I am doing and why I am doing this to myself.
I’m doing really well in my other classes to be honest, but I feel like it’s all by chance and I don’t really deserve those grades because I’m really not giving it my all. I can’t sleep. I can’t do anything. I’ve never been to office hours for my GSI, even though they said that that was one way to gain participation points because I am intimidated. They really just make me feel out of place and from the look I get from my GSI, I can tell I’m the only one who hasn’t really been to office hours.

The pass/no pass deadline has passed for the fall semester, and I don’t know what to do with my life. This class is based on just turning in this paper, and then the final draft of it.

I am going to get an F. I don’t know what to do with myself, or with my academic life…motivations…I feel so, so lost. I am disgusted with my level of motivation, energy, and confidence at the moment.

PLEASE HELP ME. IT WOULD MEAN THE WORLD TO ME.

I’m desperate. :frowning:

2

As a parent the first thing I would tell my kids (who are in colleges now) is to immediately contact their health services/counseling center. Parent orientations highlighted they are very familiar with topics like this. This is more common than you think. They know resources at your school and options for you (or at least they should). CC has lots of helpful posts, but please don’t take this kind if advice before contacting services available to you and trained to deal with your exact concerns on your campus. I googled them and they have options to connect 24 hours a day. If you are at Berkeley, you posted at 5am Sat morning, which means you are not sleeping well and may not be thinking clearly.

This mom’s advice, PLEASE use the link below and connect this morning:
uhs.berkeley.edu

3

NCmom is totally right. Contact UHS ASAP. They might be able to help you get a medical withdrawal from the class so your GPA doesn’t end up totaled. Also, I know this is going to be a highly unpopular piece of advice, but Cal is not for everyone and it can be a huge disappointment of you get there and then it’s not the right environment for you.

I would advise one of two things - take next semester off, get some counseling, and try to figure out what you want to do and then return or, my choice, would be to transfer again. I know you are a junior transfer as it is, but Cal may be the wrong environment. You might want to look into one of the lesser UCs if they will take you or a private college like Occidental. This is your life and your happiness, and Cal is a breeding ground for mental illness and depression, in susceptible students, so it might be just as well to get out.

Good luck, keep your chin up, and do what’s right for you.

4

Agree with the others. Seek help immediately.