In retrospect, I think I may have sabotaged my own chance of acceptance.
(The three schools were all Ivy’s)
<p>What was your reasoning? I agree that it was a very bad move. dd had a delightful fun interview with a Brown alum (grad school) who is on faculty at Claremont-McKenna.</p>
<p>You mean someone approached you and you said no? If so, that would be a death sentence. However, if you mean that you simply didn't sign up for an interview, then that wouldn't hurt you at all.</p>
<p>interview isn't important
they say it on their website. don't worry, good luck tomorrow and friday.</p>
<p><<you mean="" someone="" approached="" you="" and="" said="" no?="" if="" so,="" that="" would="" be="" a="" death="" sentence.="">></you></p>
<p>What schools are they? And were you called and asked to interview?</p>
<h2>No, I mean that I was offered interviews via email and declined. Here is an email exchange transcript. Names and info are X'd out, of course.</h2>
<p>Hello [My Name]...
I emailed you several weeks ago regarding an opportunity to meet. I am an Alumni Ambassador for Cornell and would like to offer a chance to get together either at XXX or nearby on XXX. I would try to answer any questions you might have regarding Cornell life and academics and perhaps gain some insight about you beyond the paper application. In the event that you wish to take advantage of this opportunity, please let me know asap. The deadline for any new interview reports is 2/11/05. Feel free to email me at this address or call me at work at XXX-XXXX.
Good luck!
[Interviewer's Name]</p>
<hr>
<p>Hello Mr. [Interviewer's Name],</p>
<p>I'm very sorry for the delayed response. I blame myself for not
checking this email account frequently enough. That being said, I
hate to put you through all of this trouble if I don't intend to
interview. I regret to inform you that, after visiting the campus
numerous times and speaking with many current students, I have very
few questions about the college. To be honest, I'm already sold on
Cornell.</p>
<p>Still, I do have a few questions, albeit highly personal/subjective ones.
Most importantly, "If you could do it all over would you still go to
Cornell?" I'm very interested in what you majored in, the years you
attended, and your overall experience.</p>
<p>Thanks!
[My Name], Cornell '09 Hopeful</p>
<hr>
<p>[My Name]....
Thanks for the responce....
Glad to answer your questions but, I have to suggest that you might still like to meet.
Our meeting would add (1) more piece of positive information to your file and might serve to enhance admission's ability to know you beyond raw data. 8 out of 10 applicants are qualified, 2 gain admission. However it is optional, and it's up to you. Should you decide to get together, we would need to do it fast. Next Friday is the deadline for my report.
Do you know John Smith at [Name of my High School]. He is one of my favorite people on the planet!
Say hello for me if you see him.
I graduated Cornell in 1976 after attending XXX. I have a BS in Communication and Marketing. My Brother graduated Cornell's School of Architecture in 1971. Incidently, he is the architect who designed the XXX Airport and the XXX Airport years ago.
My mother graduated Arts and Sciences at Cornell during World War 11. My son is headed to Australia next tuesday for a 6 month exchange student program in Sydney. He is finishing his 3rd year in the A&LS School at Cornell on his way to med school as a biology major.
To answer your question, Cornell is truly wonderful from virtually any perspective.
If I could do it again, I would... as often and frequently as I could!
Best of luck.
[Interviewer's Name]</p>
<p>Looks like declining the interview wouldn't hurt you at Cornell, since their web site says the below. However, if you get in, it could be a good idea to contact that alum. Sounds like he's a strong Cornell booster, and who knows, he may be able to get you a summer job or a scholarship sponsored by the local alum association. You never know.</p>
<p>My thoughts are that when people are going out of their way to try to be nice, which is what this alum was doing, it's a good idea to take them up on their offer. You never know what might follow.</p>
<p>"A personal interview is required for admission if you are applying to the architecture program in the College of Architecture, Art, & Planning or if you are applying to the School of Hotel Administration. Applicants to the art department in Architecture, Art, & Planning are encouraged (though not required) to have an interview. Contact the appropriate college directly to arrange your interview.</p>
<p>Personal interviews are not required (or available) for admission to any other programs at the undergraduate level at Cornell. Freshman applicants may be contacted by an alumnus or alumna in their area to schedule a time to talk and answer questions. This informal conversation is not required and is not an interview. Note: This alumni contact does not take the place of the personal interview requirement listed above."</p>
<p>Yeah, that was totally idiotic. I am an alumni interviewer for Dartmouth and I know that if you don't meet they pretty much think you aren't interested. One reason for the interview is to assess interest.</p>
<p>They don't matter, but turn it down and you are pretty much done.</p>
<p>Looking at the OP's back posts, I see that even in the fall, he posted asking if it was OK to avoid interviewing. Various posters, including me, gave him the advice that interviewing is important and avoiding interviews could look suspicious.</p>
<p>It's hard to tell, too, who the poster is because sometimes he claims to be a student. Other times, he says he's the applicant's father.</p>
<p>His original reasons for not wanting to interview were "social anxiety" and concern about his acne.</p>
<p>If he has debilitating social anxiety, I imagine that also was reflected in his recommendations and even colleges that don't normally emphasize interviews would want to see how he behaved in an interview. A person who can't handle a college interview because of social anxiety sounds like a very bad bet to go away to college. Colleges really are looking for students who can interact, not just students who'd spend all of their time studying and not talking to others.</p>
<p>I would not be surprised if his social anxiety was the reason that the Cornell alum was so persistent about trying to interview him. The adcoms may have asked the alum to check the student out.</p>
<p>I also imagine that after the student turned down the interview requests, if the colleges were seriously interested in the student, they called the GC to find out possible reasons why the student was reluctant to interview.</p>
<p>Meanwhile, both social anxiety and acne are very treatable problems.Social anxiety -- shyness-- can greatly improve as a result of behaviorally-oriented psychotherapy and/or medication. There are some very effective drugs that help with acne.</p>
<p>'</p>
<p>Why didn't you, man? Take every opportunity you can. This interviewer sounded very friendly, it would have been a good experience.</p>
<p>NorthStarMom, I have a great deal of respect for you. Your posts are consistently warm, compassionate, wise etc.</p>
<p>That being said, I think it's somewhat inappropriate and cold even to psycho-analyze someone based on so little information. </p>
<p>For one, I did indeed take your advice after reading your response to my post last year about interview jitters. (I interviewed with Dartmouth and it went very well. We've even continued to exchange snail-mail in the months since.) Having said that, the major reason I declined my other interviews was indeed my "anxiety", as you so curtly pointed out. </p>
<p>I do in fact have a low self esteem. At one time I had an extremely bloated self esteem, but that was before problems/issues (acne being one of them) that I don't feel I should have to go into. I don't, however, feel that my recent fight with anxiety and depression make me (currently or in my previous sociable, outgoing, stable state) any less worthy of a fine education. As you said, certain problems take time to control, to overcome. </p>
<p>I am still, admittedly, struggling to overcome these problems. Whether or not I will have conquered them come fall (I plan to see a psychologist, look into laser treatments for the acne over the summer) remains to be seen. Still, Im committed and I will defer my admission if I still need time. I am somewhat hurt by your post in that it not only lacked information, it lacked compassion.</p>
<p>I am truly sorry if you found my post hurtful and lacking in compassion.</p>
<p>I am sorry, too, that you have not yet gone into therapy or gotten help with your acne. As a person who in h.s. was both shy and had acne, I know how difficult and embarassing both can be. You are much more fortunate than I was because treatments for both acne and shyness have advanced a great deal since my time. I basically had to grow out of both difficulties, and had to really work hard on my own to overcome my shyness, which I am happy to say has now long been overcome. Most people who meet me now would never guess that I ever was shy.</p>
<p>What I had hoped back in the fall was that my post then would have encouraged you to see a therapist then, who could have helped you through the interviews. Virtually the only way of overcoming shyness is by learning social skills and then practicing those skills in social situations. A good therapist can help you do this in a way that is very doable: one small step at a time. For some people, medication also helps. </p>
<p>Avoiding the situations that one finds distressing doesn't allow one to get over one's shyness. It just makes one more anxious about such situations. </p>
<p>As for the acne, there are wonderful medications now that can help it. As you mention, laser treatments also can help.</p>
<p>While I emphathize with your sensitivity over your acne, college interviewers are far more interested in what goes on in students' heads than whether the students have acne. </p>
<p>Meanwhile, I was not saying that being shy makes one unworthy of a fine education. When it comes to places like Ivies, most applicants have the stats that mean that if they were admitted, they could graduate from those colleges.</p>
<p>As a result, such colleges have the luxury of selecting students who not only can do the work, but also can be active members of the student body. For that reason, someone who is so shy as to not feel comfortable having a college interview probably would have long odds of being accepted to a college that views applicants' potential contributions to ECs as being as important as their ability to write papers and do the coursework.</p>
<p>Colleges also are concerned about students who might be at risk of depression or suicide because of having difficulty adjusting to life away from home. This concern particularly affects colleges like Ivies that are very stressful, intense places. For this reason, such colleges may tend to avoid accepting students who seem so shy that they might have difficulty adjusting to college life and also because of their isolation not be noticed by other students or faculty if they became seriously depressed or had other emotional problems.</p>
<p>College is a major turning point in anyone's life. Because of your shyness and depression difficulties, leaving your familiar surroundings and going to college is likely to be particularly stressful and difficult for you. For that reason, it would be good if you got into some kind of therapy as soon as possible. </p>
<p>The summer would not give you much time to get help. In addition, depending on where you live, it may take as much as 2 months to get a therapy appointment. Also, many therapists take a month off during the summer.</p>
<p>I made a point not to do any interviews. On USCs web site it said not having an interview will in no way affect the admission decision so I decided not to do it, just to see what would happen.</p>
<p>I was accepted about a week and a half ago. :)</p>
<p>Curtisny,
How did your admission decisions turn out?</p>
<p>Hey the same thing happened to me! Brown, Dartmouth, Penn- rejection, rejection, rejection- ouch, ouch, ouch. :(</p>
<p>thanks for asking NorthStarMom...Well, it looks like everyone was correct about the whole "kiss of death" thing in the end. The three rejections I received were from the schools where i declined interviews.</p>
<p>It looks like I'll most likely end up at Bowdoin in the fall.</p>
<p>Condolences on the rejections and boatload of "congratulations" on Bowdoin! </p>
<p>One of my good friends went there and had a wonderful experience. It also sounds like a good place for you to go to work on overcoming your shyness. LACs are good places for shy intellectuals, I think, because they tend to have supportive and close communities. Their small sizes, too, make it relatively easy to get to know other students and faculty.</p>
<p>Meanwhile, I encourage you to use your precollege time to see a therapist or to at least read some books and articles about overcoming shyness. The website shyness.com can be very helpful, too.</p>
<p>Going off to college is a major turning point and challenge for everyone, and can be particularly stressful for people who are shy. Feel free to post on the Parents' Forum if you feel the need for support and advice during this time.</p>
<p>Best wishes to you!</p>
<p>I have to think that the Brown interview must have helped dd's acceptance. The interview was an exciting extended conversation and the interviewers comments indicated dd had impressed ("you don't even know it but you are soooo selling me on yourself, you are such a team player!".) She also got to speak Spanish with the interviewer who is a Spanish prof at Claremont-McKenna! What a nice hook-up.</p>
<p>I think the Cornell interviewer would have been a piece of cake for you, so friendly sounding. She was also giving you a big hint that it could only help you, not hurt--"(1) more piece of positive information to your file and might serve to enhance admission's ability to know you beyond raw data. 8 out of 10 applicants are qualified, 2 gain admission. However it is optional, and it's up to you." </p>
<p>There is a big difference in not getting an opportunity to interview, and in turning down one that is offered. That indicated lack of interest or, if you still think you'd get in, entitlement or aloofness. At the very least, it indicates that you are not willing to go to the extra effort. It can't be seen a neutral.</p>