If you could change 3 things about your child, what would it be?

<p>I thought some of you might have a few "retainerphobics" in your homes! After my daughter got her braces off, she actually wore her retainer just like she was supposed to. I got her a $400 bleaching tray to finish the job and she has put it in once since she got it. I would KILL to have their teeth and they could care less about taking care of them. Aargh!</p>

<p>We have moved this topic back to the Parent Forum. Even though it is not on the topic of College Admissions, it relates to parenting. We recognize that parents wish to discuss related topics amongst themselves. </p>

<p>Enjoy!</p>

<p>Susan and Fredo: You do not know how much good your posts have done my soul. I was so convinced that I was the only mother who had not taught her daughter to put her dirty clothes IN the basket or hamper, not on the floor, and I knew she was the only kid who didn't care if her teeth moved forward again. I was such a dutiful little twit--at her age I was doing most of the housework and cooking for my family, because both parents worked and we had a large family. I honestly have taught her to do the laundry--she just blithely does not do it. Sense of entitlement??? Weak parenting??? Just a change of times???</p>

<p>It has been a long day. Don't get me started.</p>

<p>O.K. Three new ones just for my pleasure after watching D play basketball tonight. I probably can't sleep if I don't say it aloud, and she definitely doesn't want to hear it.</p>

<p>1) Please stop making that face of total pained disbelief at that ref. The reason you got foul 2 was because you made that face after foul one, and so on and so on.</p>

<p>2) Yes I know it is unusual to have a foul called on you for blocking the person with the ball when you are the one who has the ball, but... (see number 1 above ).</p>

<p>3) When the ref tells you to let go of the girl's shirt it is probably a foul to instantly grab her shorts, and when the whistle blows.....(see number 1 above).</p>

<p>Girl's High School Basketball-The Roughest Sport Alive
I love this game!</p>

<p>Curmudgeon...I want a video of this! LOL, again.</p>

<p>Pattykk, maybe it's just one of those things that skips a generation? I wasn't taught or expected to do laundry, learn how to cook, or even to make my bed. And because I thought that was a poor preparation for life, I taught my daughter how to do those things. Not that she cooks much, but she wouldn't have to live on cheetos and chocolate if she had an apartment and I do have a "coupon" from last mother's day that I can redeem for a full dinner cooked by her at any time.</p>

<p>sgiovinc1, I'll suggest to D's physics teacher that she get the physics of home appliances included in all physics curricula so that future generations of sons and daughters won't have your son's problem. :-)</p>

<p>Three things I would change about my daughter:
1) Lose the sense of entitlement (wonder who is responsible for that?) and the total lack of awareness that she even feels "entitled" "Isn't everyone like this?"</p>

<p>2) Don't be so gosh darn all knowing and pig-headed - as in "Don't you know this (application process) is TOTALLY random. There is nothing (like, aahhh, write a better essay? or go to your alumni interview?) you can do to change outcome.</p>

<p>3) Don't, sigh, be so much like me (see #1 and #2).</p>

<p>I thought we were through the storm and last night the alumni interview crisis hit!</p>

<p>I have to commend my daughter here among the retainer-phobes. She got her braces off over two years ago--it'll be three years in February--and she still wears her retainers to sleep most nights.</p>

<p>Of course, that might have something to do with her fear that she'll have to wear braces again... she wore them from age 5 (her first palette spreader) to age 16. Her mouth was a mess before braces... perfect now. (Her brother has an untouched mouth---and has no need of braces, with a gorgeous bite and straight teeth.)</p>

<p>dmd77....Nature is NOT fair!</p>

<p>Daughter: Call me more often. Although that's improving... Be kinder to brother number one.
Son #1 - Stand up straight so he actually looks his full 5" 10". Be a little more outgoing and social. Be kinder to younger brother, act less like father. Spend less time playing computer games, more time studying.
Son #3 - Act a little more mature around friends.</p>

<p>Curmudgeon, have you read In These Girls Hope Is a Muscle? My hubby and daughter have read it and say it is really good. It chronicles a high school girls basketball team. My D does not play basketball but is an athlete so she read it. I think it has won some awards. Check it out. </p>

<p>Susan</p>

<p>Kathiep: Thought it was funny that son needs to act LESS like father!!</p>

<p>ALL of my kids are bossy towards each other but since the older two are 6 and 8 years older then their younger brother have always felt the need to tell him what to do. Example: Last night DH, Older son and I were sitting in the family room and young son walks in carrying a glass of milk. Before DH and I could even open our mouth's, older son yells at young son to "get back in the kitchen with that milk - NOW!" Poor young son tends to focus on his peers breaking the rules and is often frustrated because he's learned that tattling will get him picked on. At college, my daughter has told us that her guy friends call her Mom because she's always bugging them to clean up, put on a jacket, etc. Hey, guess they do hear my voice in their heads!</p>

<p>Literally just came back from the orthodontist for a retainer check for son. What a surprise...he needs a new retainer because the old one doesn't fit anymore because he never wore it!!! Now we get to buy a new retainer (to the tune of $250 and the first words out of his mouth were "do I have to pay for it?" and my response was "yes" - he was warned about that) and he gets to wear it full time for 2 months. It will be a battle every day at a time in his teenage life when every little thing is a battle anyway (and believe me, I'm not the one creating these battles!). Shouldn't be a pretty sight in our household for the next few months.</p>

<p>Guess he'll wear it now Fredo!! Maybe..... :)</p>

<p>To Emeralkity:</p>

<p>Your 14-year-old and my 15-year-old must be twins! . . . low self-esteem, but lots of self-confidence; lots of anxiety, but lots of talent and ability . . . I hope that they both will "grow out" of this in time. Does yours have an anxiety disorder? My daughter has generalized anxiety disorder and OCD (obsessive worries). I am eager to compare notes.</p>

<p>ya she has at least an anxiety disorder, I am dismayed to see that it appears to be more common in teens than I thought. At least there is an article about it in Teen Voices this month ( which she won't read cause it isn't a fashiony magazine)
She also has had neuro type things over the years but they have been getting better with lots of physical activity.( high pain tolerance low touch tolerance) It is really hard to know what you are doing wrong or right with kids like these. When I saw her at school yesterday, she looked like someone just ran over her dog, but when I asked her what was the matter she said... "nothing". can't make making new friends very easy. She has a few friends from her old school at her high school but I am hoping they will enlargen their group a little.</p>

<p>searchingavalon: Mine can cook too, thank goodness. She retains the lessons that put food in her belly! She is actually a very good cook, which is helpful, since she is a vegetarian and the rest of us are not. Maybe she can make peace with her future roomies over the messy room by cooking them something special.
parentofteen and emeraldkity: Girls' development is so interesting. I wonder if they will figure out what causes some to have these crises with low self-esteem. It seems to hit intelligent girls with strong talents. My unscientific theory is that one part of the brain is overdeveloped, so something has to give elsewhere. My daughter was such a spunky, confident young child, but middle school hit her hard. She does not have the sensory issues, but my son does, and he also has tics like flicking light switches and flapping his arms. If I had it to do over again, I would study neuroscience.</p>