<p>Done right: visited the schools, tried to look beyond the brand names, tried not to let the tour guide form our opinion of the school (difficult). Acknowledged that no school is perfect, looked for schools that will work with you in a positive way when things arenÂt going perfectly. </p>
<p>Done right in spite of ourselves  we tried to let a sport drive the process. The sport was removed after picking the school. The replacement activity - Speech - turned out to be exactly what this child needed at this time, and the sport will easily Âkeep for later.<br>
Lesson learned  donÂt let a single sport or activity drive the process. </p>
<p>Came close to being a regret, but done right with gritted teeth  child 2 had to pick between the academic power house and the school that would help him develop good habits. Came within 5 hours of picking the powerhouse, but in the end went with the chance to learn good habits. With 20 20 hindsight, I am sure that the academic powerhouse might have helped on the habits, and the Âdevelop good habits school has demonstrated intellectual firepower. The important thing is that we are seeing increase in performance and decrease in sense of entitlement. Worth the gritted teeth and the brand name foregone. </p>
<p>Lesson learned  if itÂs going to be important to you in a crisis, ask during the interview process about counselors or dorm parents or who ever it is who you can call if things go wrong. If youÂre lucky, you wonÂt need them, but if you do need them, you want to know what the attitude is before the crisis hits, not during. We actually didnÂt ask about this during the interview process, we just got lucky enough to chose the school that has dedicated counselors with sympathetic and sensible ears. We needed it. </p>
<p>Lesson learned  put them on a budget and get them used to running their own finances. Here is X$ that needs to last Y months, figure out how to deposit it in a checking account and get it out with that magical but dangerous item, the ATM card. Among other things, a limited contribution from the Bank of Mom & Dad sure increases the motivation to earn their own money during the summer. </p>
<p>Lesson learned  no choice is 100% good or bad, though sometimes I found myself thinking in those terms just to keep my sanity. Enthusiasm and persistence will get you a long way. </p>
<p>Lesson learned  trust your gut. Driving away from the powerhouse school, where Mom, Grandpa, and Great Uncle had studied, child #1 said ÂMom, people arenÂt happy hereÂ. Probably an extreme response, and we had to get through unhappiness at the school she did end up going to  but as I watch her count-down to graduation, three years later, I can say that she knew what was good for her, and her choice has worked out fantastically well for her.</p>