If You Could Do It All Over Again

Prep School Admissions Prep School Parents
81

<p>I am VERY new to CC but have really enjoyed this thread so thanks to everyone. My wife went to Taft and now we are in the process of looking at BS for our middle D. Our oldest one had no interest at all but our middle one is very excited about the prospect of BS.</p>

<p>She is a very good student and a 3 sport athlete. She loves the whole team environment and we think she will thrive at BS not just in sports but in the community atmosphere as a whole. We were also told at two interviews that she “will have options.” For whatever that’s worth!</p>

<p>Honestly right now after her getting accepted what terrifies me most is not being able to make it happen for her financially. But I guess I just have to see what happens once all documents have been submitted. Anyone have any advice for me on how not to become obsessed worrying about the money?</p>

<p>I look forward to visiting this site frequently as we go through this process.</p>

82

<p>HDIPFT: Your daughter sounds like she would really enjoy the BS environment. I know how you feel about the $$, we are in the same leaky boat. I am just methodically going through the process and helping our D not become too attached with the idea of BS in case we don’t receive the aid we would need. We have 3 other younger children to think about. I have been told that we would definitely qualify for aid but how much is the question. We have also been told to cast a wide net and that you could be surprised which school might award aid and who might not. Evidently awards can vary drastically depending on the school and how much they think your child might benefit their community. Try not to stress. Especially in front of your daughter. Give it your best shot- either it will happen, or it won’t. Your daughter sounds like she will thrive anywhere she goes.</p>

83

<p>There is no getting around the money question, but when your child thrives it is all worth it. In our experience (N=2) BS FA is more generous than college FA. That said, our EFC at both levels has changed our lifestyle. Vacations, new clothes, major home repairs? You may need to wait till you’re done with the whole tuition endeavor (HS and college). For us, it was underfunded PS or BS and we chose the latter. There is no comparison. Both kids have thrived at BS in ways we could never imagine at home. But if you have local options, I would think long and hard. In the end we will have seven years of BS and college tuition and it gets old. I would add that our idea of EFC and the schools’ were not the same (schools wanted more), but we’ve adjusted and been grateful. </p>

<p>I’m not trying to be a killjoy. I just wish someone had been frank with us. We wouldn’t change our decision, but perhaps we wouldn’t have gone through the adjustment pains as much. Once the opportunity euphoria died down, the long term commitment realities were, well, a drag.</p>

84

<p>HDIPFT-My advice would be to go onto the Boarding School Review and search schools by endowment size. Make sure you have schools on your list that have generous FA programs that are bolstered by their endowment. Search the endowment size per student which equalizes the playing field. Also you mentioned that your daughter plays three sports, make sure you complete the prospective athlete form. Look at the St Paul’s School website under financial aid, they have a calculator that is useful. Some schools are very generous- weekly stipend, books, technology, and travel home for breaks.</p>

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<p>Here is a list of the top per student endowments:</p>

<p>Phillips Exeter Academy Co-Ed 9-12, PG > $600,000
1.-8. Groton School Co-Ed 8-12 > $600,000
1.-8. St. Paul’s School Co-Ed 9-12 > $600,000
1.-8. Church Farm School All-Boys 7-12 > $600,000
1.-8. Phillips Academy Andover Co-Ed 9-12, PG > $600,000
1.-8. Woodberry Forest School All-Boys 9-12 > $600,000
1.-8. Deerfield Academy Co-Ed 9-12, PG > $600,000
1.-8. The Hotchkiss School Co-Ed 9-12, PG > $600,000
9.-23. St. Andrew’s School, DE Co-Ed 9-12 $300,000-$600,000
9.-23. Middlesex School Co-Ed 9-12 $300,000-$600,000
9.-23. The Thacher School Co-Ed 9-12 $300,000-$600,000
9.-23. Mercersburg Academy Co-Ed 9-12, PG $300,000-$600,000
9.-23. Peddie School Co-Ed 9-12, PG $300,000-$600,000
9.-23. Episcopal High School Co-Ed 9-12 $300,000-$600,000
9.-23. Culver Academies Co-Ed 9-12 $300,000-$600,000
9.-23. Lawrenceville School Co-Ed 9-12, PG $300,000-$600,000
9.-23. Chatham Hall All-Girls 9-12 $300,000-$600,000
9.-23. Choate Rosemary Hall Co-Ed 9-12, PG $300,000-$600,000
9.-23. The Taft School Co-Ed 9-12, PG $300,000-$600,000
9.-23. St. Mark’s School Co-Ed 9-12 $300,000-$600,000
9.-23. St. George’s School Co-Ed 9-12 $300,000-$600,000
9.-23. Miss Porter’s School All-Girls 9-12 $300,000-$600,000
9.-23. Milton Academy Co-Ed 9-12 $300,000-$600,000</p>

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<p>Nice to see Mercersburg rocket up the list after the recent $100 million donation :)</p>

87

<p>Endowment size doesn’t necessarily correlate with individual FA offers. We actually rec’d more aid from the school with the smaller endowment. I assume they simply wanted what our child had to offer more.</p>

88

<p>Ditto for our family. D has close to a full ride at a school where if you divide their endowment by # of students, when she graduates, D will have received more than her share.</p>

<p>Cast a wide net. If there is a school you or your child is very attracted to but the stats don’t add up, apply anyway. It is not a mathematical process even though a number of cc posts look at it that way.</p>

89

<p>U need to look at what the school’s actual FA budget is, then divide by the number of kids receiving FA. Some of the richest endowed schools are surprisingly tight w their FA budget, as compared to their more modestly endowed cousins.</p>

90

<p>GMT, that is before the gift. Now, mburg is in the top category with over 600k per student. The gift is kicking off a new campaign with a goal of raising 300 million. Ms. Simon’s gift puts them a third of the way there. If the campaign is successful, mburg will have an endowment per pupil that rivals Exeter’s.</p>

91

<p>wc1958- You are correct, the endowment per student does not necessarily determine the size of you FA grant; however, it does significantly increase the number of students that receive aid which narrows the gap between the haves and have not. So if your are only interested in your individual aid, then endowment really shouldn’t matter. For our family, I preferred a school that was more economically diverse because there is a very limited number of families that can afford 50-60k a year for high school. Small endowments typically means that the full tuition payers subsidize the FA pool because typically a school only pulls about 4% from their endowment per year for operating expenses. My son is at a school that has 50% of student receive aid, 25% full scholarship and it really does lend itself to a very diverse student population and the elitism of boarding school is minimized.</p>

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<p>I disagree. Unless the public schools are MAGNET schools they tend to be very socio-economically & racially segregated. People self-segregate by income level, because of the cost of housing.</p>

93

<p>I agree with GMT+7.
Our Local PS has single digit % free-lunch kids and single digit minorities.
I’m aware of other districts with double digits free lunches and minorities population.</p>

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<p>Firstgen: you make a compelling argument, but since I assume many readers are looking for insights, it’s important to note that there are many unknown variables in virtually every school’s FA strategy and budget. For example, I know of one school that boasts a notably large % (+/- 50%) of students receiving aid, but digging into it reveals that there are many students receiving small ($1K+) merit scholarships that are counted as FA. And while you say “Small endowments typically means that the full tuition payers subsidize the FA pool” we have also noted that because the schools with large endowments tend to be the ones that are the hardest to get into for FA applicants, the FA students who gain admission often have better stats (SSAT, etc.) than the full pays. And while this is true in most private schools, there can be a sense that while full pays may or may not be subsidizing FA, FA students are there to raise the school’s stats. </p>

<p>Both of my kids’ schools are much more diverse, in every sense, than the school they would be attending at home. And while the endowments at their schools may not be in the Exeter range, there are plenty of kids on full scholarship and we have never felt that the schools were more or less elitist than their peers. As pwalsh indicates, boarding schools are mostly perceived as elitist, period, large endowment or small. The social dynamics within this world vary relatively little.</p>

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<p>Pwalsh- I will tell you why I won’t send my kids to public school. I live in a major metropolitan area and the school system is considered one of the best. You will hear people say over and over that “I have a very good public school system”. I will tell you that if you look behind the curtain, the very best public school cannot compare to the college preparation a kids gets from a good private school boarding or day. (With the exception of a few outstanding public schools that you have to apply to get into so in essence they are free private schools- Thomas Jefferson in Northern VA is one) Personally, I have developed my own test to determine if a school is adequately preparing its students for college and I call it the “writing test”. If I ask a senior at one of the most highly regarded high schools in my county, (i.e. placement into highly selective schools, sat scores and AP classes) how many papers they have written during their high school career, the number is usually less than 10. If you ask-Have they ever written a term paper, the answer is no! These facts are validated by teachers within the school system. On the other hand, my daughter was a day student at a local prep school. After graduating I asked her the same question. In English alone she had written 46 papers over 4 years. When considering papers for all classes, the number exceeded 200. Prep schools teach critical thinking and critical writing, they do not teach to the test. Private school teachers work on a year to year contract as opposed to public school teachers who are protected by unions and tenure. A great book about the failure of the public school system is The Conspiracy of Ignorance by Martin Gross. So no, I will not sacrifice my child’s education for the sake of diversity. We worked hard to strike a balance between real world diversity and rigorous academics. If you are blessed to have a public school system that performs to the same standards as most of the prep school discussed on this forum, count yourself lucky.</p>

<p>Wcmom1958- I am not sure where you are getting your information but every school that publishes the percentage of students who receive aid also publishes the average grant received and I have never seen anything around 1,000.00. There are very few families that can afford 50-60k per year for high school. Some schools pride themselves on being elite and others take a very humble approach. My son’s school has a 17million dollar financial aid budget with 50% of the student receiving financial aid. The school is very committed to the fact that everyone should have access to a world class education regardless of one’s ability to pay. The school is in an active partnership with the Kahn Academy developing online course content. The Kahn Academy offers free online education to anyone, anywhere in the world.</p>

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<p>You seem to be overrating the value of writing imo (your choice of course). You don’t solve real world problems by writing about them, you do so by using your analytical and other tangible skills. Case in point, Steve Jobs, Warren Buffett, Richard Feynman didn’t go to boarding schools, just to name a few. They didn’t even go to USNews ranked public high schools.</p>

97

<p>Just because you are on a parent thread doesn’t mean you are necessarily communicating with other parents. Sometimes comments just don’t seem right, look at the previous posts of a person and the mystery is usually exposed. Just a reminder.</p>

98

<p>Folks, please do not hijack this thread. Some very good information has been brought out by the respectful interaction of people who may not agree with each other but respect the other’s experience and the point of view that has resulted from that experience. I am sure there are more people with good information to share, who will post on this thread if it stays civil, but will be driven away if it doesn’t.</p>

<p>Thank you.</p>

99

<p>

To name a few 1-in-a-million exceptional individuals is not the right way to evaluate a school or school system, just as to point out a few “miserably failed cases” is not. The overwhelming majority of families and kids need a school where they have a more reliable bet for a good education.</p>

<p>

The poster clearly was using writing as an example to make her point, which is that many private schools have an advantage in paying individual attention to their students and more effectively train students in critical thinking skills. Grammar and spelling may not be critical for some professions but critical thinking is. Case in point, to post a convincing argument on an Internet board needs critical thinking, which I hope most if not all of the 300+ boarding schools are teaching students like you.</p>

100

<p>What happened to “the pen is mightier than the sword?" And, don’t forget, punctuation saves lives:</p>

<p>Let’s eat, grandma.</p>

<p>vs.</p>

<p>Let’s eat grandma.</p>