I'm a commuter and I'm miserable

<p>I'm a 3rd year student, but I don't want to say I'm a junior; I recently switched majors, so I'm basically starting all over again. I'm going to be a 6 year student, so I have a little more time in school left.</p>

<p>The problem is, I'm a commuter. I don't know why it took me so long, but I just realized that in 3 years being here, I haven't made much of a life here. I mean, I wake up, drive 20 miles to school, go to my classes and drive home at the end of the day.</p>

<p>In 3 years, I haven't made a single friend or developed a social circle here, and it's really starting to get to me. My only friends are the ones from high school, but when I'm on campus, the only familiar faces I see are my professors. </p>

<p>It's just so hard meeting people as a commuter. I feel like I've missed so much; I've never been invited to the dorms, or to events or to parties and it's killing me on the inside. </p>

<p>I try hanging out around campus after class, but still, not living in the dorms and not knowing anyone, I feel completely isolated. In 3 years, all I have to show for my college experience are my academic record and 3 photos and 20 posts on my facebook.</p>

<p>I don't want to live like this anymore. I want to be invited to chill in the dorms. I want to stumble drunk across campus with friends on a Thursday night. I want to make out with a girl at a party. What do I have to do?</p>

<p>Get a dorm room...</p>

<p>If you want these experiences, you need to move into the dorms, at least for a semester or two. That, or make friends in other ways, like getting actively involved in some EC's or groups that interest you.</p>

<p>I'm a commuter and I totally get it - I live with my parents, I spend almost 2 hours a day commuting. My college is in Manhattan so it's too expensive to live there, and dorms aren't guaranteed after freshman year. It's definitely harder on your social life. </p>

<p>I tried to join a bunch of clubs and get involved on campus, but that's harder too...like yesterday, I had a club meeting at 8, my classes ended at 12:30, so I had almost 8 hours. problem is, I need to do my hw, which requires bringing my laptop and all my textbooks with me - I walk, take the train, and take subway, and I can't physically carry all my textbooks as well as laptop, notebook, folders, etc, so I need to go back home to do all my stuff, and then it takes so long to get back again it's not worth it. </p>

<p>it's harder to make friends, but you really have to put yourself out there and be really outgoing, in classes and EC's and stuff. that's how I made my friends...and most of my friends dorm, so I chill in their rooms, go to parties with them, go out to eat with them, just hang out on campus and around the city...sounds like you need to make more of an effort to meet people. Get a dorm, if possible! If not, just be super friendly. </p>

<p>Also, is there some kind of Commuter organization in your college? We have like 3 and they have luncheons, brunches, little activities every week...I met a lot of commuters that way.</p>

<p>The next time you're on campus, go to the housing office. Ask about what you need to do regarding requesting housing for the fall. Ask about the costs, paperwork and deadlines, housing options, and chances of getting assigned to on-campus housing. The later you do the paperwork and pay your deposit, the less your chance of getting offered an on-campus room.</p>

<p>Start playing a club or intramural (sp?) sport, </p>

<p>I think that helped me the most in college in terms of meeting new people.</p>

<p>up here in canada 80% of people commute. college life isn't like it is in the states.</p>

<p>^Yeah this American college culture is so weird to me after growing up in Canada. People freak out when I say I might commute to a school 30 mins away. My relatives in Canada commute up to 2 hours! lol</p>

<p>See kids. This is what will most likely happen when you commute.</p>

<p>Thursday nights are for studying for Friday’s tests. . .</p>

<p>Its quite obvious!</p>

<p>I can certainly empathize with your situation.</p>

<p>I was a commuter student as a freshman, and I made no friends that year. Over the summer, I got a job as a software engineer, so I decided to locate closer to work than school. This led to another year of being away from campus. If I could do it all over again, I would have lived on campus my freshman year. However, I realize that doesn’t really help your situation.</p>

<p>My junior year, I moved on-campus. I met more students and started to make friends. However, I have to say that you must make an extra effort to get to know people. After freshman year, a lot of people have found their college friends, and it is up to you to get to know them. By the end of this year (my senior year), I have gone to parties, had friends over, gotten sick of having people around all the time(quite a reversal!), and my college experience has only gotten better with each passing year.</p>

<p>My advice: join clubs or move closer to campus. It helps to room in a 4BR apartment with people you didn’t know. It will force you to meet people even if you run the risk of not getting along with them. Anyway, I hope that helps.</p>

<p>I wouldn’t considered to commute to school, you should stay in a dorm… it also may be the university/ college you attend.</p>

<p>LOLZ!</p>

<p>Do you really think the op is still checking this thread?</p>

<p>The first post was 1/28/09!</p>

<p>he’s the nightman and it’s nighttime, of course he’s checking.</p>