<p>^ i have to agree with ThreeDude on the plastic surgery part</p>
<p>But ive had the i-dont-care-what-you-think attidude my whole life and its never worked, so behind closed doors im still depressed...i cry every single night b/c of the new horrible jokes/rumors are made about me and so on..and like I said before, others have flaws they want to change, but are you telling me they also have NO FRIENDS and their own families make fun of them...i have nobody close to turn to, hence my problem...</p>
<p>i don't need a personality change b/c im not some depressed pessimistic person at school or wherever...but i cant help but cry secretly at night....i wake up thinking i might get someone to say hi back to me in the halls or something....nope....and another day begins and i think i'll try giving a sheet of looseleaf to the girl next to me who never has any...no thanks from her---she doesnt accept it and asks the girl next to her for a sheet....it's really that bad...</p>
<p>and everyone says it'll get better in college...but why risk it...i know there will always be people who make fun of anyone, but from my experience at colleges from tours, overnights, etc. i still get excluded/ignored and i dont even go there yet...ive seen it and the students act no more mature with me in the room...i just know it wont get better and you'd be fooling yourself to think it will...people dont magically change once they go to college--and chances are i will be with a lot of the same people i was with in high school too...</p>
<p>Hey there,</p>
<p>I'm going to start off to tell you that everything that you're going through is real. You have the right to be in pain, to acknowledge that you are in pain (and you've done this, which is a very brave thing to do) </p>
<p>Now I'm going to suggest that you talk to someone - if not classmates or family, is there a teacher at school you feel close to? If not is there anyone in your outside school activities or something that you feel close to? Does your school have a counseling system? </p>
<p>I'm glad that you think yourself as pretty, even though people have been horrible to you: how you see yourself is the most important thing. I'm not against plastic surgery if it's for the right reasons, as many people go through it and have much more confident, happier lives afterwards. So, you can consider surgery, but for the right reasons. If you do it, do it for you and yourself only. If you honestly like the way you look, don't change it. Also it sounds like the people at your school don't know how to appreciate beauty that's not part of the mainstream. A lot of celebrities were made fun of in school for their looks, the same people that we think are gorgeous today. </p>
<p>Adolescence sucks. It sucks a-s-s. But I think right now your peripherie is limited because you are confined to the world of home/high school that you hate. It's what I feel too, and it's what a lot of people feel. I'm a junior now and my lowest points were 7th grade through 9th grade where I was dealing with my identity (I'm from a different country) and I honestly felt like I had no soul on earth that I could talk to and be honest to. Some people never have those low adolescence moments, others like you may have longer ones.</p>
<p>But I'm going to tell you to keep your hopes up. What I think you need right now is to think about the future. You don't have much left until adulthood, when you'll no longer be so strictly confined to this narrow world. Choose your college wisely, the place you think you'll be happy at. Think about the future and I know it might be hard to but you have to believe believe believe that you will be happy. Sophomore year I was happy, I thought the chronic sadness that had been looming over me since puberty hit was gone forever, and then this year I don't know if it's the added stress from coursework but I feel it approaching again, yes, I know what it's like to walk the hallways like a ghost and feel so empty inside. Try to focus on the beautiful future you will have if you keep working hard. I'm going to hang in there, and so will you. </p>
<p>Ok, that was my rather long two cents...and please, please PM me if you want to talk more.</p>
<p>I was talking about a core change, not a surface change. Pretending to be confident is impossible (that's called arrogance, which people detest). A true confidence means you have to come to grips with who you are so you DON'T cry at night. Going to school and putting on this I-don't-care attitude only gets you so far, instead find the motivation to understand why it doesn't matter.</p>
<p>i had this guy in my APUSH class.. really nerdy looking, smart, overweight, at lunch he stayed in class, he ate two lunches at first my entire class thought of him as annoying because he would back talk but as the semester went on we got to know him and he was funnier and right now if somebody came in our classroom and talked about how he looked or anything about him i would look out for him and my entire class would too... that's how friends are made, that's how they are.. u gotta stick with them or you'll be a loner and i don't want u becoming the girl in the lunchroom that nobody sits with</p>
<p>like topgirl said we're all here for u, if u have other problems feel free to tell me</p>
<p>about the core change--like I said, i really am optimistic and try to see the good in others and opportunities to make friends...i'm not arrogant...i'm just nice and am confident that when i say hi to someone or whatever, it will be reciprocated...but time and time again it doesn't work....i cry not b/c im not confident, but b/c i am missing out on life and b/c i feel for everyone else who is made fun of and begin to think about that when i cry...I don't care what others think as long as im treated w/ the respect i deserve, but when my God-given human dignity is jeopardized, I care as if it was anyone being hurt...how can you NOT care when their meaningless thoughts and opinions become weapons to kill...Christians believe that "thou shalt not kill" is not only physical murder, but also slander, exclusion, etc.-anything that attempts to hurt a person on purpose is an attempt to "kill."</p>
<p>And THANKS for all the advice---I appreciate it...i just still can't help but feel like there is something i haven't thought of/tried that may help my situation...so please don't be put off by my comments back...im just trying to give as much info possible so i can get as much help/advice/support as possible to get me through this.</p>
<p>Also: people change, friends change, relationships change, there's this girl at my school who not very many people liked, including myself, her freshman year because we judged some aspects of her without really knowing her, and she presented herself as some things that she's since grew out of. Now she's one of my good friends and I think it's funny how I absolutely despised her my frosh year. You said you had a social life your freshman year, well that shows you have the potential to connect with people, right? And evidently we are all on this thread connecting with you too. Now maybe you don't need to change anything at school, maybe the people at your school are all dumb jerks that you don't want to connect with anyway, and if that's the case that's fine because guess what, you don't have much of it left. From what I've seen, for people who really enjoy high school college tends to be a bit of a dip, but for people who feel trapped in high school college tends to be a blast. And I bet so many people who will be your classmates in college arrive feeling the same way that you do, that you're ready to have a life free from the little weird world that's high school. So have FAITH in yourself!!</p>
<p>i haven't gone to church in a while.. im catholic. I don't agree with some of the views of catholicism and like me not everybody knows the rules even though they're common. forget about everything, right now have a glass of water and think about the happy things in ur life, i don't want u going in actual depression. i've only see the first stages like yours and i don't want to see the 2nd and 3rd.</p>
<p>Let me preface this by saying that kids in high school are <em>*holes. Key word: *</em>. There are obviously exceptions to the rule, but looks like your classmates aren't. </p>
<p>Let's look on the bright side: you're a senior. That means only a few more months of this BS. Then, you get to college. College tends to weed out the people like your classmates, though some will remain. Also, in college, people are generally more accepting and mature. Ignore them, insult them back, talk to the principal. Do whatever it takes (except maybe physical violence) to get this resolved. No human being deserves to be put through this ****. Whenever you're down, always remember: only a few more months and I'm free from this hell!</p>
<p>I think the real problem here lies with your family members. Seriously, aunts and uncles making fun of you? Tell your parents about this! I cannot believe grown adults would pick on a kid. I would be so tempted to say something like: "Wow, I thought most people stopped being ***holes when they got out of high school. Guess you two are the exception."</p>