Impossible Decision....Help?

College Search & Selection
1

<p>I'm feeling very confused and frustrated with my college decision. I have a wide range of incredibly good options, and as everyone I've talked to has said, I could never make a BAD decision here. That said, I want to choose the school that will challenge me academically and socially and yet still let me feel comfortable. I want an intimate setting with a lot of support, but I don't want to feel like I'm wimping out and denying myself the opportunities that a bigger school could offer. </p>

<p>The schools I have been accepted at and am considering are:</p>

<p>Brown
Smith
Haverford</p>

<p>and to a lesser degree</p>

<p>Vassar
Oberlin
U. of Chicago</p>

<p>This past week I visited Brown and Smith (for ADOCH and Open Campus, respectively) and I liked both of them. </p>

<p>At Brown, I loved the campus and loved Providence, and every single student seemed to be bubbling with happiness. However, the organization of the program wasn't so hot, and my hosts were literally absent during my entire visit except from 2 AM to 9 AM (when I was sleeping), and I didn't really feel a strong connection to any of the other visitors or students. I got the sense that Brown students are expected to fend for themselves more than at a smaller liberal arts school. </p>

<p>At Smith, I felt very comfortable, and the dorm I stayed in was beautiful (Tyler House). However, I did not get a sense that Smith students were quite so across-the-board happy, and of course there is the issue of it being a women's college (no boys...). At the class I attended, the student discussion honestly was not very impressive, and I feel that in some ways Smith could make me feel confined. </p>

<p>I realize that this is more my need to vent than anything else, and of course no one can make the decision for me (especially without knowing me as a person) but any takes on the colleges I have to choose from or some general idea for how to choose one would be helpful. Thanks!</p>

2

<p>No answers here yet... just questions -
Are you a senior who's already been accepted to these schools? Or a junior still feeling things out?</p>

3

<p>I've already been accepted to all of these schools. Sorry for not making that clear.</p>

4

<p>Haverford is the smallest of the three, even if you count in its shared departments with Bryn Mawr. Brown is the largest, with Smith halfway between the two. Will you get claustrophobic in a small community or is it exactly what you need?</p>

<p>Brown and Smith have the most in common with each other academically since neither have distributive requirements (unless you want to graduate with Latin Honors at Smith) and both embrace the Ivy tradition of New England education. Northampton is a lot cleaner and livelier than Providence's East Side/Thayer Street, but Providence is a real city with stuff to do not too far from campus.</p>

<p>Personally, I'd pick Brown, followed by Smith, then Haverford, but here's the trick: I'm not you. What do you want to study? What kind of student body do you want?</p>

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<p>go to brown</p>

6

<p>What's wrong with UChic??</p>

7

<p>Don't base your opinion of Brown on the one bad experience you had. Go back for a second look if you can. Or talk to some current students to see if your initial impressions were correct (or ask these questions on the Brown board on this site). Also, if you liked Smith but didn't like the lack of males, why not Vassar? Have you visited Oberlin? It seems like one of those love-it-or-hate-it sorts of places.</p>

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<p>I would go to Haverford or Brown.</p>

9

<p>There's nothing wrong with either Chicago (although if I find Brown a little intimidating...who knows what I'd do at Chicago) or Oberlin. I just haven't visited them, so they get the shaft because of my own failure to do thorough research. </p>

<p>I think if I were to choose a co-ed liberal arts school, it would probably be Haverford and not Vassar. I have visited them both, but I think that Haverford probably has slightly stronger academics, and it would be extremely convenient logistically, since my brother is a sophomore there.</p>

10

<p>Obviously, the best choice is the one that fits best with you.</p>

<p>It does not sound like Smith is that one.</p>

<p>You did not tell us enough about yourself or the others to allow us to offer a useful opinion, as you know.</p>

<p>It sounds, though, like you do or can know or strongly sense which is best for you. It then is a matter of honestly admitting which colleges do not have what you know you need. It is hard to say to no to five places, but you will have to do it.</p>

<p>You want "an intimate setting with a lot of support." Does not sound like Chicago could be the place for you.</p>

<p>But on the other hand, you do want and expect strong intellectual stimulation--consider your doubly negative reaction to your intellectual experience at Smith (were you able to go to classes at Vassar or Haverford? What was your reaction?). DOES sound like Chicago could be the place for you.</p>

<p>So, which is more important--intimate support or strong intellectual challenge? If you can't have enough of both, you'll just have to decide which is more important to you. </p>

<p>And if you gave that "intimate setting" up, what exactly would you expect to get or use at a larger school? </p>

<p>I do not necessarily agree that there are no wrong decisions here. If you feel confined at any college, that will be a problem IMO. So think carefully now, and IMO err on the side avoiding a feeling of confinement. Be certain that your choice is big enough, in the intellectual sense, for you. For four years.</p>

<p>And why do you want to feel comfortable? You said that you were comfortable at Smith, but then you listed four negatives about it. For you, comfort appears to be overrated. </p>

<p>There is the discomfort of confinement--THAT discomfort you should avoid. But then there is the discomfort of being out of the "comfort zone" as they say--and that discomfort can bring the greatest satisfaction and results. What happens, and has happened in the past, when you go out of your "comfort zone"? </p>

<p>And is there/has there been something uncongenial and unproductive about fending for yourself, as people perhaps do at Brown? Or are you in fact at your best then, even though it might feel uncomfortable?</p>

<p>I think you CAN make a wrong decision here--so consider seriously. But I believe that you will make a right one. :)</p>

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<p>Actually a LAC like Haverford would have a cool academic/intellectual environment like Chicago. I was just at wesleyan for a few days this weekend, and I ran into more intellectualism and random conversations about philosophy/politics/science than i would have previously thought.
Needless to say, I loved it.
Haverfords an awesome school, Chicago is too but I also feel that you'll be academically stimulated at both with Haverford catering more to your individual needs than Chicago (since Hav. is a lac afterall).</p>

<p>Brown is also an awesome choice, and it's really chill from what I hear. If you honestly do like the school, try visiting again if possible and talk to current students. Don't let the organization of an Admissions visit spoil it for you!</p>

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<p>Well, first of all, you have been accepted to six great schools. Congratulations. You should have more confidence in yourself. I would forget about Smith, since you viisted and were not thrilled. With five other choices, you don't need that. I went to Chicago. It is far from un-nurturing. The dorm system is great. Most classes are small, and I guarantee that faculty in your major or any field that you take a few course in will know you. You can always talk to the faculty running your dorm or to your advisor. Professors are approachable. Chicago is famous for having a focus on undergraduate education, and you probably picked it for that. It also has a nice mix of pure academics and preprofessional training (pre-business, premed, prelaw, education, social work). You must know a lot about Haverford, since your brother is there. That is a plus. You seem to like the place. I would concentrate on Brown, Chicago, and Haverford.</p>

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<p>The next 4 years will be some of the best in your life and you should choose the school where you will be happiest- obvious. This is the same advice that I gave to med school applicants and resident applicants when I was on my med school's and residency admission committee. "There are 20 hospitals in the USA that truly consider themselves and deserve to be in the TOP TEN. You are lucky to be applying to those. Find a place where the people are happy and THEN ask if those reasons resonate with you." You can remove "hospital" from what I said and stick in "university/college" and that truth still holds. </p>

<p>Look for a school where your departments of interest have a baseline competence. Don't get caught up with "PhD production comparisons" and detailed stuff like that because that is the proverbial "trees thru the forest" metaphor. The next 4 years are just that: college + summer internships + study abroad. If you find a college that you love but has a department that's just "good", well that's OK because that is what summer internships are for... especially at the LACS. My friend (phil/dance major) loved the vibe at HC as an applicant and decided to go even though the performing arts is not HC's strong suite... and supplemented her dance experience by getting a coveted internship at the Kennedy Center her junior summer.</p>

<p>Finally, I'd weigh the "brother factor" a little more heavily than just as a matter of "convenience". I didn't consider this as greatly in my college choice as I should have... but am lucky that stuff worked out for me. I had as similar choice to you: Brown, HC and Swat. While I have a lot of great memories about my academics, professors, friends, and extracurricular achievements, my best thoughts are the ones involving my older sister and brother who were at BMC and Swat when I was an HC student. Going to a school that is nearby your siblings- or, in your case, share- is a great opportunity in life where you get you know your family on a different and deeper level... stuff that you will be able to share when you're 60 or 70 (I'm actually 32 right now). I would never recommend to someone to go to a school JUST because of family, but in your case, as you seem equally pulled between schools, this is something to really think about.</p>

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<p>The OP made it sound like they wanted to get more individual attention and have a slightly less competitive environment in college.
I think this makes the choice between brown, haverford, and smith, since Chicago isn't really going to be able to offer either of the options as deeply as the other three schools.</p>

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<p>Too bad you didn't have the chance to visit Oberlin. Sounds as though that might have been the perfect match.</p>

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<p>"the school that will challenge me academically and socially and yet still let me feel comfortable. I want an intimate setting with a lot of support, but I don't want to feel like I'm wimping out and denying myself the opportunities that a bigger school could offer"</p>

<p>sounds like vassar</p>

17

<p>My D had the opposite experience at ADOCH. I think you probably just got unlucky. She's a little nerdy and still had people call her over and invite her to sit with them. Brown has the rep as being one of the friendliest schools. The only thing I would say is that I think you might need to be a little bit of a self starter. U of Chi, the place that fun goes to die, has more of a reputation of keeping the kids feet to the fire academically.</p>

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<p>Whatever78, I completely disagree with you there. That sounds like most good colleges.
I think Vassar is slightly limiting due to its location, might just be me though.</p>

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<p>the OP's list did not consist of every single top college</p>

<p>out of the list given, it appeared that vassar fit the OP the best</p>

20

<p>First of all, I'd like to thank everyone for your opinions...it helps just to get out of my own head a little bit and look at things from another perspective.</p>

<p>("You want "an intimate setting with a lot of support." Does not sound like Chicago could be the place for you.</p>

<p>But on the other hand, you do want and expect strong intellectual stimulation--consider your doubly negative reaction to your intellectual experience at Smith (were you able to go to classes at Vassar or Haverford? What was your reaction?). DOES sound like Chicago could be the place for you.")</p>

<p>As far as that goes, I was equally unimpressed with a class that I attended at Vassar. To be fair, it was a required freshman seminar that most of the kids seemed uninterested in, but they just were NOT involved. My brother's take on the academic situation at Haverford is that it probably wouldn't be as challenging as Brown, and knowing me as well as he does, he would push me towards Brown. </p>

<p>I'll try and summarize my situation a little more clearly: </p>

<p>Brown: the frontrunner; my dad's an alumn and would love to see me go, all my friends think I should go, and I think in many ways it is the best fit for me. It would challenge me to go a little out of my comfort zone, but I think that in this situation that's a good thing. </p>

<p>Haverford: another attractive choice, but one that feels a little like a cop-out. It has a lot of wonderful aspects, but might be smaller than what I really need to let myself grow. </p>

<p>Smith: an odd contradiction; I love the residential life, and I got into the Zollman Scholar/STRIDE program there, but I'm turned off by some aspects of the social and academic atmosphere. </p>

<p>Chicago: maybe the most stimulating intellectually, but it's very far away and very different from what I'm used to. A little scary!</p>

<p>Oberlin: somewhat overlooked. I feel like it doesn't have quite the same prestige as the other colleges, and there's also the fact that I'm a serious musician who doesn't want to get a performance degree; the conservatory students there would probably make it hard to participate in ensembles, etc. However, I did get a nice (1/2 tuition) merit scholarship at Oberlin. </p>

<p>Vassar: not as high on my list as it once was. I really dislike the setting (Poughkeepsie), and I don't have a very clear sense of Vassar's atmosphere. There's also the relatively minor issue of the old president leaving, which might be bad.</p>

<p>One other thing; Brown is apparently well known for its "chillness," specifically on drugs and alchohol. I'm not a wild-frat-party-hard-drinking type girl, so that's a bit of a negative for me. Oberlin also has a reputation as kind of a "druggie school," and I wondered if anyone has a better idea of how the situation is in either case.</p>