<p>Because my friends haven't given me good advice about this...</p>
<p>I had several classes that I enjoyed very much with this professor. I always tried to keep my distance though(as did everyone else) because he was a little on the "touchy feel-y" side and would make me uncomfortable. We didn't interact that much but when we did he was always a little too close for comfort.
More than a year ago he took a job at another college in the area. After I ended my final class with him he send me a long, detailed letter that was flattering, but totally inappropriate in his detailed description of how physically attractive he found me to be. I didn't reply and he sent me a few more emails after that and eventually stopped. About a year after the emails I got a friend request from him on facebook. Maybe it was because a year had passed(and out of some morbid curiosity) that I added him back. He was only my "friend" for a week because I had to block him due to several messages. They were full of comments about my appearance and sexual innuendo. The day after I blocked him he sent me an email saying he hoped he had not offended me on facebook and that these were "messages of admiration."
I'm pretty creeped out. I know this is more of a personal problem than a problem with school. Considering that he doesn't even teach at my school anymore I cannot report him or make a complaint, but he is still a professor. I know he was inappropriate with other students in the past at my college.
Do I email him and tell him o stop? Should I ignore him?</p>
<p>If you don't like what he's doing, tell him to stop doing that. This is a non-issue.</p>
<p>Now if you've told him that his "messages of admiration" were unwelcomed and he kept sending them, then you have a sexual harassment issue on your hands.</p>
<p>You need to immediately notify the authorities at your school and at his school with copies of all of his communications with you. This is predatory behavior, totally unprofessional and he needs to be severely disciplined for preying on those he is charged with guiding and protecting. Do it for the sake of all those students he is now or will be sexually harrassing. Know that he is also placing the school at great risk of a lawsuit and they will handle this quickly and firmly.</p>
<p>Tell him to stop, in clear, direct terms. If he continues, tell him that you're prepared to request a restraining order. Stay completely out of his orbit.</p>
<p>Thanks for the advice. I think I'm going to take Dave_Berry's advice and tell him to stop once and for all.
However, what do you think about what M's Mom said? Do I have a responsibility to report him to his college?
and "quirky," I wouldn't waste your time.</p>
<p>You need to speak with him first before going to officials. He may not even realize what he's doing is inappropriate. There are some people that are just socially...clueless. Give him a chance to make amends, if he persists, then contact the college.</p>
<p>I had a professor who refused to touch me or any of the other girls, even in appropriate and sometimes necessary circumstances. It was a guitar class, so we'd ask him for help about where to place our fingers on the guitar and he'd just point at our hands awkwardly as if he were terrified of us instead of physically assisting us.</p>
<p>He was hot, though. He looked like a rocker version of John Stamos.</p>
<p>idk if I want to give him a chance to make "amends." I want him to leave me alone. You know? I don't want an apology. This guy seems hell bent on having some kind of weird friendship with me.
lol@Uncle Jesse professor.
he does see socially clueless. But at a certain point I don't think that's a good excuse anymore.</p>
<p>That is very creepy, good luck dealing with this.</p>
<p>Along what you said Plattsburgh, I had a high school teacher who was very well-intended and sweet. When I told him I got into Georgetown he said "oh my gosh!.....is it ok if I hug you?" I was like "Yes it's okay!" Hahahaha it was very cute. He's an older guy with a very good heart.</p>
<p>Edit: I don't think he's socially clueless, he's just a stalkerish creeper for sure.</p>
<p>I agree - you don't want to give him a chance to make amends. People like this, who do not seem to 'get the message' through normal means, will take anything as encouragement (my D is dealing with a stalker 'ex' situation and any response is taken as encouragement - he tries all sorts of ways to get her to respond - why are you upset, what did I do etc - any response starts off a more intense round of communication attempts). </p>
<p>Dave Berry's response is the best advice. Tell him to stop clearly and directly. And if he continues talk to the police. My daughter is on the verge of that.</p>
<p>Do not do what PlattsburghLoser is suggesting. </p>
<p>You were very wrong to add him back as a Facebook friend a year after you dropped him. </p>
<p>Stay clear of his orbit. Communicate with him AS LITTLE as possible. Anything you say/write to him, NO MATTER HOW 'DISCOURAGING' YOU THINK IT IS, will be taken as encouragement by him. ANYTHING. </p>
<p>If I were you, I'd make copies of all his written communication with you, black out your own name, and mail it to his current school.</p>
<p>I do feel pretty freakin stupid for adding him as a facebook friend. I guess I felt guilty and maybe like I was overreacting and blah blah blah... </p>
<p>"If I were you, I'd make copies of all his written communication with you, black out your own name, and mail it to his current school."</p>
<p>That's a really good suggestion. I have many friends who go to his college and I hate to think of them dealing with this creep.</p>
<p>lol akhman24. very tempting. but no thanks.
I just saw that he sent me another email(albeit innocent and free of creepy comments).
Why does he continue to contact me when I never respond? I think he just wants some kind of response out of me.</p>
<p>I would tell him to not contact you again. If he persists, I would report him to your school. There may be a reason he left your school to go to the new one. Perhaps it was a pattern, for which he was fired and he could still be harrassing some of your former classmates as well. Have you looked him up on the child predator website? He could even be a previous offender. I also hope he does not know where you live. If so I would definitely get a restraining order
I was actually surprised when I was a senior in college that one of my friends told me that freshman year our Calculus (full) professor offered her "A lay for an A." I guess I was just naive at that age that this would happen at a top university.</p>
<p>Do exactly as Dave_Berry keeps suggesting: tell the creep to leave you alone. Be very clear and tell him he creeps you out. He obviously has not gotten the message so you need to be very DIRECT with him. If he persists, report him to his school. Do not accept an apology or try to be friends with him. he's a prof, not your friend or even a member of your peer group. He has no business sending you this crap.</p>
<p>how about sending him this? Is this straightforward enough? and seriously- thank you guys for your suggestions and input. This has really been bothering me. </p>
<p>"I did block you from facebook. I found your messages and previous emails inappropriate. I do keep in contact with former and current professors. However, they NEVER comment on my physical appearance or insist on having a friendship with me. Maybe you have a different way of expressing yourself, but it makes me very uncomfortable.<br>
I would prefer it if you did not apologize or contact me in the future."</p>