<p>Okay so my parents are Pakistani and they say I have to go into medicine and become an MD surgeon or else they will basically disown me and not pay for my college education (Im gonna be a college sophomore). When I asked them why, my dad said only some boys make it and bring honor to their family. Seriously this is a cracked old-world notion of honor. Well anyways, I want to go into engineering (Ive always been fascinated by robotics), but my parents said that it wont bring me any respect (I think its a good job), and Ive decided that after I go to medical school for 4 years and waste my time getting my MD degree I will not do residency and apply straight for an engineering job. In fact, I will never even tell anyone that I wasted my time and parents money at medical school. I want nothing to do with medicine and will one day tell my kids not to go into it. My major is currently Biomedical engineering. Do you guys think this will work? Why or why not?</p>
<p>If you do major in biomedical engineering, you will be taking most or all of the pre-med courses anyway, so it is no big deal to be a pre-med as far as course selection goes (you can, however, do pre-med with any major, though your schedule will be crowded if you are in some other type of engineering). But if your GPA (particularly the biology/chemistry/physics/math GPA) is not extremely high, or your MCAT score is not very high, the MD schools in the US will make the decision for you (see the pre-med forum). And even if you do get into medical school, what will your parents be able to contribute toward to cost of medical school?</p>
<p>On the other hand, biomedical engineering at the bachelor’s level is not all that great in job and career prospects compared to most other engineering. See the <a href=“http://talk.collegeconfidential.com/internships-careers-employment/1121619-university-graduate-career-surveys.html[/url]”>http://talk.collegeconfidential.com/internships-careers-employment/1121619-university-graduate-career-surveys.html</a> . Also, if you “want nothing to do with medicine”, why are you majoring in biomedical engineering?</p>
<p>Your major is biodmedical engineering. With your bachelors you will be able to get a job adn be self-supporting. Why bother going to med school at all when you truly will be wasting their money. If they agreed to pay for undergrad, then do your best there.</p>
<p>I realized it would be crowded but BME is the only major that I can do and still maintain a good gpa. Also my insane parents won’t let me do any other major because it’s not related to medicine and said I have to be an MD no matter what and that they will pay for it (even medical school). So after I accomplish their dreams, I will try to do what I want.</p>
<p>If your mind is made up, why are you asking us?</p>
<p>When you graduate from college, you can get a job and be self supporting, or you can try to go to med school to appease your parents. It is your choice.</p>
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Then you’d be repeating trying to exercise the same level of control over your kids as your parents are trying to exercise over you that you’re complaining about. I don’t think you really want to do that.</p>
<p>You’re over 18 now - do what you want. Your parents’ misguided old-world sense of ‘honor’ is their problem - not yours.</p>
<p>I don’t understand why you’d even think about going to med school if you don’t want to be a doctor regardless of your parents’ opinions. It makes no sense to go to med school unless you specifically want to apply that education in the biomedical engineering (or other) area - which is something you might want to think about. But if you’re not motivated to go then even if you’re accepted to one you likely won’t do well and it’ll be a waste of money and time.</p>
<p>Now’s the time to think for yourself and do what ‘you’ think is best.</p>
<p>Don’t waste your time and energy and you parents money on Med school. Finish your UG and become self-supporting so that you can call your own shots.</p>
<p>Design the first robotic MD with auto-diagnose and auto-sloppy-hand-write and auto-cranky-retort-at-2am-in-the-morning. Your dad will be satisfied and you get to sleep normal hours.</p>
<p>There are too many deeply unhappy MDs who actually thought it was what they wanted to do professionally. Going into medicine when you aren’t drawn to it (actually, when you aren’t on fire to do it) is a prescription for lifetime unhappiness. Create your own happiness. Your parents will get over it.</p>
<p>So far so good. The bio med degree is a great compromise. Good for you. Your parents are happy and you are getting college paid for and keeping the relationship with your parents.</p>
<p>Moving Forward:
Get involved in some robotic research at school as soon as you can. Have you researched bioeng and robotics? FInd a prof doing what you find interesting, study his research until you know it cold and then go talk to him about a research position in his lab. This works. There are also paid REU’s for summer work you can apply for next year.
You can tell your parents you are doing research with Dr so and so…</p>
<p>How about a fully paid fellowship in bioengineering heading towards your Phd?
Have you any interest or do you just want to get a job?</p>
<p>What are you doing this summer/</p>
<p>Instead of a knee jerk “do what you want, you are an adult” response, I will tell you this:</p>
<ul>
<li><p>There are a lot of MD’s who go on to pursue careers that are not directly involved in providing patient care, but still take advantage of their medical knowledge and training.</p></li>
<li><p>Have you considered going in for MD/PhD programs- if you get in you can get your MD for free and you will have the opportunity to continue working in biomedical engineering/robotics. You will be in much better shape for getting a job in that field. </p></li>
<li><p>Don’t discount a career in medicine entirely, just because your parents are pushing it on you. Medicine is increasingly becoming a very technology dependent field… you could become a surgeon, perform robotic surgery, and then also be involved in technology development. You may really enjoy it!</p></li>
</ul>
<p>Realize that you are (just) a rising sophomore, your interests and priorities could change in many ways that you cannot anticipate.</p>
<p>awesome post vicarious.</p>
<p>As a teacher to those who are learning English, I understand the parental pressure you feel. I see it all the time. I have tutored young people flunking bio who want to be poets but are struggling in science because their immigrant parents believe that medical school is the best pick for their children. It is also very hard to pay for a college education without support (both financial and emotional), or to go and bring ‘shame’ to a family by choosing to not study what mom/dad order. I think you are very wise, Compute14, to be majoring in biomedical engineering, and some of the others here have said the same. It is a compromise for now. It will be very, very hard to change your parents’ minds. If they live in this country, perhaps you could arrange a meeting for them and counselors/advisers at your school who are involved in engineering/medical education programs. If your parents could see the possibilities/opportunities/salaries/career paths (and some probably haven’t even been invented, yet) perhaps it would help them understand how much freedom people have to choose what sparks/drives them the most. Good luck to you!</p>
<p>Premed is an intention, not a major- be sure to tell your parents that. You therefore need a major, and any major will work for medical school. You can compromise by meeting medical school admissions with courses you take, if you have a science interest you are likely to take many of them anyhow. Plan your major around something you actively like- it could even be philosophy (I have had classmates in medical school with all sorts of majors). You can tell your parents the major does not matter, and in fact it can be to your advantage to have a less common major.</p>
<p>You can major in anything you want to and still satisfy your parents’ desires. Once you have the degree you can get a job, pursue grad work- whatever you please since you will be able to be financially independent of them. </p>
<p>At this stage in your life you still need to appease your parents to have them continue to finance your education. I presume they are not physicians or they would know there are better professions. H and I are physicians (H from India) and we tell people our son is too smart to become a physician- he majored in math and added comp sci, currently working before grad school. We hope he will go to grad school but from what we hear from those with PhDs it may not be the best move career wise.</p>
<p>At this point in your life you have to play the “please the parents” game. This is to be able to afford the education YOU want. The gamemanship is in how you satisfy your parents while taking the courses you want to get the degree in the field you want. Really fairly easy if you are math-science oriented. Get the required premed courses done while choosing specific courses that help with your major. If you prefer a nonscience major take the easiest versions of science courses and the minimum credits.</p>
<p>Don’t stress out about it. Eventually take the MCAT if your parents haven’t become wise about careers but don’t spend a lot of time studying for it. Use that time to pursue your favored field. If you happen to like another medical field, pursue that. Eventually you will graduate with a degree in the field of your choice, presumably with excellent preparation if you put your heart and soul into it like your parents want you to do for medicine. You either get a good job or a paid way in grad school- becoming independent of your parents.</p>
<p>When it comes time to apply to medical schools you can do that if your parents insist. Of course you won’t get in if you don’t write a strong essay, have strong recommendations and strong ECs. btw- don’t bother to do medically related ECs- your parents likely won’t catch this current trend and you can tell them you are too busy concentrating on academics. But that is a couple of years from now so don’t worry ahead of time.</p>
<p>Remember to be true to yourself and study hard in your chosen field. Do well in your field- you will reap the rewards of that. Enjoy your college experience. Your parents will eventually realize you were fine when you are happy and successful in your chosen field. They did come to the US after all and gave their children an American education including American thinking. I could easily convince your parents that being a physician isn’t the most prestigious job for those with high intelligence, nor is the lifestyle the greatest for a family.</p>
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<p>Going for a PhD in CS would be mainly for someone going into academics or leading edge basic research; it is not necessary for someone who wants a good career in computer software.</p>
<p>There are many companies out there that make medical devices. I’m thinking of two in the joint replacement arena. They would love to have a biomedical eng with an MD who doesn’t necessarily want to be doing surgery or pateint care, but developing the next level of materials etc. Go talk to your BME advisor about it. Develope the next CATSCAN or MRI.</p>
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So not only do your parents want you to become an MD, they specify that you must be a ‘MD surgeon’. </p>
<p>It sounds like some posters are suggesting to the OP to consider getting an MD anyway but the OP clearly doesn’t want that - only the OP’s parents want that. I don’t think the OP should try to placate the parents somehow by going to med school when it’s clear there’s no motivation on the OP’s part to do so at all.</p>
<p>The OP is already in the major apparently so the best path forward is to get the BioE degree, graduate, then decide whether to go to work or go on to grad school or work for a couple of years and then do grad school if interested.</p>
<p>I’m fully willing to knee-jerk this one and tell the OP to do what he/she wants and the parents will have to get over it.</p>
<p>This whole shame to the family thing has to stop. It’s the very mentality that justifies honor killing, and it’s time this generation steps up and says no more. This bullying by parents is cultural and deadly.</p>
<p>Do I want a doctor who hates his field? Don’t think so. Do us a favor and stay away from real people if you become a doctor tom please your parents.</p>
<p>I’m glad someone brought up the patients’ point of view. A lot of suffering is caused by doctors who don’t want to or shouldn’t be in the field.</p>
<p>Sympathies to the original poster, with hopes that this frequent phenomenon with certain parents stops being a painful factor for so many.</p>
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<p>However, the OP needs to at least pretend to be pre-med while still under financial control of the parents – i.e. at least until able to self-support with a job (presumably after graduation) or funded graduate (PhD) study, or (if still in college) age 24, marriage, or US military service (the thresholds for financial independence from parents as far as college financial aid goes).</p>