Of course, in the 1970s, it was more possible for a high school graduate to be self-supporting through work, while having some left over for the then-trivial state university fees.
Suppose kid #2 also got into Harvard, but the parents cannot afford to send him/her there because all of the money was spent on sending the first kid to Harvard? (Maybe NYU would be a better example, since Harvard does give good financial aid, so it is often a lower cost option for some of the few who get admitted.)
I was not arguing that if the first kid chose an under-budget school that the following kids should be limited to that amount. However, I was arguing that the parents need to consider what they want to be able to contribute for following kids when considering the budget for the first kid’s college.
I agree that all does not have to be equal, but each kid should at least have some shot at an equivalent experience. in this case, the student has good and affordable choices. It is not a choice between an elite and a directional state u, but among some relatively equivalent schools.
I also agree that if kid one goes to in-state public, by their own choosing, either because that is where they always wanted to go or because their effort in high school points them in that direction, that doesn’t mean kid 3 or 4 can’t go to Harvard. Or vice versa. But it should not be that kid prefers CSM over Texas A&M so parents take loans which limit the other three to much less costly options. There is no one perfect school for anyone.
The name of the school is not a factor in a success in engineering career. She wants to go into devt - her choice as long as she understands what it entails…some of them have such an “open” eyes that they do not see beyond their own nose so to speak.
The right fit is worth some money in my opinion but I also think every family has a line on “how” worth it. Was worth some student loans for my D to go to a well regarded LAC with small classes and exactly what she wanted than attend the giant public universities that were affordable but that she dreaded. However, our line was parent loans. We have another child. We weren’t going into debt for the first and sacrifice the second.
Fit is great, I am all for it, but its a luxury. A financial/academic and social fit can be found in many places. With 4 kids in the pipeline, do NOT set the precedent by going into debt for college. Just- no.
Is the primary driving force behind your daughter’s preference that she fell in love with Mines or fell in love with Colorado? I can suggest another cheaper way to get a Mines degree if this is really about Colorado.
^because Wl’s are not just yield management… if fewer students commit than planned, the students getting off the waitlist will be the full pay students (= budget management). Ergo, OP’s child has virtually no chance of getting off the waitlist.
What does your daughter like about Mines? What makes it the perfect fit for her?
The first classes are thankless, very deliberately “weed out”. The setting is beautiful, but how about you save on tuition and promise to offer her a trip to Colorado every year with a fraction of the savings?
Do you also need to take on parent loans for Cal Poly SLO? Even from OOS, it should be much cheaper than Mines - COA at Mines is 48k, whereas COA at Cal Poly is about 34K.
Our Mines friends told us students also use Colorado’s Guaranteed Transfer/Pathways program. 1-2 years at another Colorado school taking the core classes (Calc 1&2, physics, etc) and then transfer to Mines for the final 2-3 years. Saves money and avoids the first year weed out drama. For example, OOS cost at Fort Lewis College in Durango is $31,000 v. $48,000 at Mines in Golden. Western State in Gunnison is also around $31,000.
I think you and your daughter should discuss how much better a “fit” can be when you are not assuming a debt burden and over-spending on her undergraduate education. Internships, foreign study, travel, et al, are very nice fits for most young women, also, and they are all more feasible if she attends a less expensive college. Once the student sees this perspective, her own might shift.
Cal Poly SLO could be a happy medium between TAMU and Colorado Mines, in terms of fit and costs. TAMU is not everyone’s cup of tea, just like Oberlin is not everyone’s cup of tea. While Mines is 48k, Cal Poly is about 32-35k, which I hope is sufficient to be covered with parental contribution + student loans, without any parent PLUS loans…
However, if the OP wants to be able to contribute to college costs for younger siblings, the OP needs to determine what that will be before making any kind of financial commitment for the current college-bound kid.
I must be missing something but why PARENT loans as opposed to STUDENT loans? Is it because she can’t get the amount she needs through student loans and thus the only remaining option is for parent loans to cover the shortfall? If parent loans are really required – I’d say no. I mean anything can happen – you have 3 younger kids at home and need to plan for their college, your retirement, paying off your own house if that isn’t done, and frankly who knows what other expenses can pop up; what if the roof suddenly needs to be replaced in the same yr that the car dies?
If you really mean student loans – what kind of loans are we talking? When you run the numbers through a calculator, what kind of payments would be due upon graduation and are the type of payments a new hire in chemical engineering or biomed engineering can make “easily” while still having money for rent, a car (assuming they don’t end up in NYC or Boston they’ll need one), etc.? How certain are you (and she) that she WILL do engineering of some variety – any doubt in her/your mind? Because if she’s someone who says she’ll do BME and then gets to college and decides a bio major is for her, her employability is a whole lot different and servicing that debt will be much harder.
I think “fit” is important, but talk with your DD about what she expects her college career to look like. The reality is these days – building up a resume while you’re in college matters; it is no longer the case that you can graduate college with a resume that shows you waitressed for a few summers. You need internships – some pay, some don’t; likely you get internships in engineering that do pay, but it’s not always easy to secure them and they may not be located where you are – which means you’re shelling out for things like summer housing. If she goes to CM, her “choices” in that regard will be restricted - will you really have the means to help her out with summer housing if say she gets an internship at GE Atlanta? Likely not – she’ll be feeling pressure to find internships where she is in Colorado or in your hometown. Going to a school like Texas A&M gives her a lot more career flexibility which will only help in building a resume – bc you’ll be “saving” money on school, if she needs $1000 to be able to go live in Atlanta or Chicago or wherever in her soph summer, you’ll be able to help. Same things with stuff like study abroad (though I’m not sure how many STEM folks can feasibly do that), spring break vacations, sorority/party/“fun” costs.
We went into the whole college search knowing we had a set amount to work with and that we would not do parent loans. We talked to her about how she was in a position where she could avoid having loans herself. She had two favorite schools. One school was phenomenal, but she’d have to take out the top amount of loans every year to attend. The other school fell within our budget and she can graduate with no loans. We made sure she understood what graduating from a college with no loans would mean for her in four years. She got it and while we were visiting the other school she made the comment that she didn’t even feel like finishing the application for the other school because she was perfectly happy to go to this one.