<p>I recently got into a top 5 PhD program but I have been having some doubts about attending. I have read so much about the difficulty and stress of being a graduate student, and the significant trade-offs (Losing the best part of your 20s, not having a social life, losing significant income). Now I am beginning to think of dropping out even before I started.</p>
<p>Convince me, are their any redeemable aspects of graduate school especially at the PhD level.</p>
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<p>I don’t know what you read or what you are talking about, but the only part of what you just said that I think is true is losing significant income. Otherwise, after you’ve passed qualifiers, being a graduate student could be the best time of your life socially! Professionally, you get to totally focus on a single area of interest to you so that become a world class expert and have to make a significant contribution in order to graduate, so you know that you will. Socially, you kind of own your own time, and get to meet great people. The last year or so is pretty stressful because you feel ready to graduate but you can’t because of finishing writing the dissertation, but the period of doing the research for the dissertation was great. </p>
<p>Congratulations!</p>
<p>In these tough economic times, being a fully funded grad student is comfy cozy, shielded from the cruel cold world.
Sure, you’ll have friends who may be earning big bucks but you are still better off than your friends in medical school who are racking up thousands in student loans and working long hours for mere pennies.
Its all a matter of perspective.</p>
<p>I guess it’s time to make some harsh decisions about what you want to do with your life. You’ve gone this far and have gotten into a fantastic school so obviously there’s some kind of specific dream you’ve been thinking of for a long time. If you’re starting to doubt those goals it’s okay, people’s interests change all the time, but don’t doubt them for the wrong reasons. Of course this is going to be difficult, stressful, and very time-consuming- it’s a PhD program at a top school! But you got in, and they don’t accept just anybody, so of course you can do it.</p>
<p>Oh, and one thing about difficulty and stress in grad school: From what I can tell (a necessary disclaimer because I’m not a grad student yet), if you feel stupid in grad school, it’s because you’re supposed to feel stupid. You’re probably going to be trying to solve a problem that nobody else really knows how to solve. So, yeah, it’s hard, but at least it’s the good kind of hard, right?</p>
<p>Graduate school is kind of depressing and stressful to begin with like anything else that’s intense. There’s a lot of work and a steep learning curve. Therefore, you will be stressed out. A disproportionate number of graduate students also suffer symptoms of depression and anxiety.</p>
<p>However, it goes away after a while - or at least it lessens. You’ll learn how to manage your time and how to surmount the large amount of work you’ll be expected to do. You’ll learn how to tackle all the reading and to balance your time in the lab and in life. You’ll develop a social life, if you make the effort to - either by hanging out with people in your program and/or by exploring your city and doing the things you enjoy. And hopefully, you’ll keep or rediscover the passion about your research - the reason you came to graduate school in the first place. One of the best things about the job is flexibility. You may work 60 hours a week, but they will be any 60 hours you want. Aside from lab time, you can do your readings or work at 2 am if you please.</p>
<p>I realized how fortunate I am this summer. I’m doing a corporate internship. Not only is their idea of “flexibility” being able to work from home one day a week and “summer Fridays” (if you stay an extra half hour for 9 days, every second Friday you can take half the day off) - which is flexibility, but it’s corporate flexibility - it’s also <em>boring</em>. Yes, it’s research-related, but it’s not in my field and I dislike being chained to a computer for 8 hours a day. As a graduate student, if I wanted to go walk around the park at 2 pm or bring my articles with me, I could, because I could always do the work in the evenings. Or better yet, if I needed to go to the post office, the DMV, the bank, etc., I didn’t have to try to scramble to do it on lunch or do it on the weekends. And the DMV in my city isn’t even open on Saturdays - seriously, none of the offices are - so I suspect you have to take a half-day or day off just to get your license stuff done. (I have an out of state license, so I have to go in person. It’s expired.)</p>
<p>Yeah, it’s stressful, but most jobs worth something in life are stressful sometimes. And the autonomy and flexibility are worth it.</p>
<p>Reality-</p>
<p>You’ll have to be absolutely sure you want to go to grad school. Do whatever soul searching you need.</p>
<p>Because if you still have doubts once grad school begins, you’ll most likely end up a dropout) statistic. I’m not saying that it’s a bad thing, just that if you aren’t completely focused, any discomfort will be an excuse to drop out.</p>
<p>Current biomed-related grad student:
Losing the best part of your 20s: meh, I don’t think you are losing them if you consciously make sure not to lose them (have a social life, do fun/interesting things outside of work, make an effort to do what you want, etc. etc). Also, 5.5ish years (for my program) really isn’t that long considering how my other friends from my UG class are spending those years floundering/wandering/confused/trying to find/like their jobs. Yes, the whole PhD training (Phd, post-doc path) is long before you get a ‘real job’, but you have to look at it as a journey/living life than just trying to reach an end goal (the process IS the point).
not having a social life: my classmates in my grad program are great and I feel like my social life is just as good (probably much better) than if I have a ‘normal job’
losing significant income: I get paid close to 30 grand a year, so I don’t really see this as an issue.
I also had some serious doubts/commitment issues before starting in my grad program (should I really do it? should I quit before I begin?), but then I thought I had worked so darn hard to get to that point (which made the thought of not going through with it a little sickening) - that I decided to give the first year a try. I am happy that I did. I would recommend starting the grad program, if you are super unhappy, talk with your admin/profs/etc. and if you are still super unhappy, consider leaving (or mastering out). But I would give it a year.</p>
<p>True about the 20s thing. When I thought of graduate school that way - as losing my 20s - I was miserable. Once I realized that I loved what I did, graduate school became better, and honestly I think it’s a great way to spend your 20s. Honestly, you’re probably not getting paid that much less than your working friends, and you have a lot more flexibility. Plus, many of them will return to graduate school later anyway.</p>
<p>And if you think of the PhD program as a ‘real job,’ you’ll also feel better. You are essentially getting paid in exchange for work.</p>
<p>But I read a former graduate student advice piece that had one of the best pieces of advice I’ve read about grad school. Decide ahead of time what you are willing to sacrifice for it. If you have an SO, is it your relationship? Sanity? Financial stability? If graduate school is demanding things that you decided you didn’t want to sacrifice…leave. But it doesn’t have to.</p>
<p>Thank you guys for all your advise, feeling a bit better and I have been talking to other people who have been telling me basically all you have been saying. </p>
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<p>Well see thats one of the problems, I dont want to sacrifice relationships and stuff for grad school. I am scared I woudl not have time to date while in graduate school which is depressing because I am not yet even 22 and dont want to leave my life that way.</p>
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<p>I could be wrong, but weren’t you considering quitting grad school several months back?</p>
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Then don’t. </p>
<p>Even if you’re a workaholic, career-obsessed, 80-hours-a-week lab rat, there’s still time for dating, if you make that a priority. I mean, you might not be able to go out on a date every single night. And, of course, the trick to being a workaholic in a successful romantic relationship is to find another workaholic to love. (Just ask my husband. ;))</p>
<p>Confused grad – you didn’t indicate what area of study? My advice – as long as you will be doing research of interest to you and think you have a good chance of writing significant papers for publications it will be a worthwhile experience. If you have no clue as to what you want to research and whether your research will end up having any value of significance…or simply feel like meaningless busy work…you might want to think about this path a little harder. On the other hand, look at the current economy, what would your other options be if you decide not to go to grad school?</p>
<p>What PhD are you getting? Some PhDs are easier to get than others.</p>
<p>When I first started, I felt the same way, that I might be loosing time and lost income from the years I will be in graduate school. But after being in school for a year, I think its worthwhile. I have an active social life(hang out with my friends outside of class) and I make sure to take time for things I value the most (like visiting family atleast once or twice a month since I am not too far away from them) and traveling and exploring different places.</p>
<p>And like Juillet mentioned, you are not too far off from your working friends financially anyway, you are making a living (on a stipend) compared to what they start out in entry level jobs that is on par with what you make. And most come back to school to get a graduate degree anyway. </p>
<p>And think of it this way, once you have a PhD, nobody can take it away from you. You have far more career opportunities open for you and you are a hot commodity even in industry. </p>
<p>It is worth every moment, I believe so!</p>
<p>There is a big carrot waiting for me when I finish grad school. I earned a slot in the Forest Service’s Student Career Experience Program, which means that I have a guaranteed job this summer and next, and upon my graduation, I will transfer into a career-track civil service job in my degree field - outdoor recreation management/interpretation.</p>
<p>But if I drop out or flunk out, I’ll be dismissed from the program. No second chances or probation - get below a 3.0 and it’s over.</p>
<p>The degree is worth it and the direct hire to a federal job is totally worth it. Whatever I need to do, I will keep my eyes on the prize.</p>
<p>Maybe just echoing what others have already said…</p>
<p>Jumping into a 9-to-5 job in a cubicle right out of college would have been depressing for me. Grad school can be a kind of society-approved bohemianism. Your work is mostly self-directed, you are studying a subject that intensely interests you, you are spending time in the “life of the mind,” you are on or near a campus with tons of other students to have fun with, you will have a cool degree when it is all over. It is certainly not for everyone, and lots of doctoral students wash out for many different reasons.</p>
<p>Remember that if you are in grad school and a great opportunity comes along that would require you to quit your PhD, there’s nothing wrong with quitting. Of course, it’s not something you should do lightly, and you should probably get advice from many other people first. But don’t succumb to the sunk costs fallacy there. Being in grad school doesn’t close you off from other opportunities.</p>