<p>This summer has been incredibly trying. I go to school six hours away from my home, and came home for the first extended time in a year this summer. Ive been absolutely miserable this summer and its been tough. I was going to get a job but my boss was dishonest and turned me down, and my high school friends have been non existant. At one of my friends grad parties a few days ago, these parents that were friends with my mother (all these kids go to instate schools) talked about how their kids still hang out with the same friends from hs. I dont have that. I went to a different high school than my entire middle school and completely had to start over. I went to an ultra competetive HS and struggled mightily, and i was smarter than all the kids that got better grades at the public school. I went away to school, and i really matured and i made a good amount of friends. Im in a frat, and I won an award for best charachter in the freshman class in my major. People down at school tell me im such a nice and thoughtful person..but if im such a nice and thoughtful person why in the world can i not find a meaningful long term relationship with anyone. I make a few good friends, and maybe an occasional girlfriend( Ive had 3, but none more than a few months) and no matter how hard i try to keep friends, they usually leave. I want someone that stays in my life for forever, and i cant understand why if im such a great person everyone wants to be my friend when im doing something for them, but when i need a favor they dont care. It is always me who initiates the talking, Im just terrified that im going to be alone and lonely at 75.. I know ill look back on this and laugh someday i hope, I know im much different at 19 than i was at 15. I just need advice, being alone all summer is driving me up the walls. Thank you so so much everyone. God bless you all</p>
<p>Do you think you might unconsciously come across as desperate? If you’re too willing to help people out, and too eager to maintain relationships, it may be off-putting. I’m not saying it’s the case, but it might be something to keep in mind, especially when you say you say you “want someone that stays in [your] life forever” (though I definitely agree with the sentiment!). Friends come and go a lot at this transitional point in your life, but I’m sure you’ll cultivate a few good friendships throughout your time at college. 
Don’t give up, but don’t try too hard either, and it’ll happen!</p>
<p>Oh, and it’s normal – I have a few friends in town, but because of our schedules, and my laziness, we never hang out and we’re all bored and lonely too. :p</p>
<p>Thank you so much!</p>
<p>To op: Sometimes youre lonely, sometimes youre not. Thats life. Make the most out of it. </p>
<p>Sent from my HTC Glacier using CC</p>
<p>OP, don’t worry so much. A lot of kids are in your situation the summer after they come home from freshman year (I was in the same boat 3 years ago, went to college 3000 miles away from home. Coming back, I discovered that most of my high school friends were either pretty boring to hang out with/I had very little in common with them, and that if I ever wanted to hang out with anyone, I had to do the extensive planning). Just make the best of it and keep busy (distract yourself with hobbies - hiking, biking, reading, volunteer somewhere etc), and you’ll be back at college soon enough. </p>
<p>And don’t worry so much about the relationships thing, I’m crappy at that stuff too (just about everyone is terrible at it, at our age). Seriously just remember that you are not alone: almost everyone is afraid that they’ll be a cat-lady/miser living alone 50 years down the road, whether they admit it or not</p>
<p>Lord. I feel like I’m in the same position as you and I went to my state school an hour and a half away. My best friend from college lives in the same county as me and I’ve only seen her 3 or 4 times since being home because she’s been so busy with summer school and other things.</p>
<p>But you just have to realize that the summer can really suck for college students, especially freshmen. I think a lot of us think that when we go home, we’re going to just be able to pick off where we left off, but it doesn’t work that way. Not to mention it’s a different environment. It’s hard to move home. It’s hard to go from being constantly around people your own age 24/7 to going to being with your parents all the time and all of the people that you spent 100% of your time being surrounded by all of a sudden aren’t there. It’s hard to adjust to that.</p>
<p>OP,
the past year has been busy for you and all your classmates…life has progressed. My sons all went to school more than 500 miles from home, and experienced what you are experiencing now. That life has gone on without them.</p>
<p>You went away to school, had great experiences, made new friends, did all sorts of things that did not involve your friends from home. Obviously they did not go in to a state of suspended animation waiting for you to come back…they have been going about living their own lives as well. Especially if they have spent the last months together at a more local school, it might seem as if they are excluding you. You might need to make an extra effort , if you really want to hang with these kids, but if you are trying to hang with them only for something to do, and not because you really value their friendships, that will come across loud and clear.</p>
<p>As far as not having a lot of friends, look around at the adults you know. Most adults don’t have large groups of friends and move through life in a pack…that’s high school. Life gets busier as you get older. Most adults have a couple of close friends, and a wider group of acquaintances…</p>
<p>Don’t worry that you don’t have your “adult” group yet…that takes time.</p>
<p>
Dude… this is more than a most freshmen, I’d wager.</p>
<p>Reading some of these threads on CC make me wonder if 95% of the members on this site or spoiled, rich white kids from Calabasas, CA or something.</p>
<p>You’re not the only college freshman feeling lonely in the summertime. This is not uncommon. And I’m sure you have a few people you could call up and hang out with. And if you don’t…Okay? Go to the gym, spend time with your family, do something to get ahead over the summer.</p>
<p>You’re way too young to be worrying about what’s going to happen at 75. It’s all good bro.</p>
<p>
Wealthier neighborhoods -> educated parents–> competitive schools -> students who want to get into the best college / optimize the un-optimizable -> students who go to College Confidential for help</p>
<p>Thank you so much! All is well now, just one of those days! Thank you very much for your input!</p>