<p>Glasses: Oh my gosh. This person doesn't need a chance. He is white, wealthy, spoiled, has been given loads of advantages and opportunities by his pushy and aggressive parents, and has little to show for it. So you're saying the process should become even more random as in, "Hmmmm. Nothing really remarkable here except a good test score. Let's take a chance on him?" I do think his parents MAY be UC alums. I agree with JHS that a teacher may see something that peers might not, and is able to convey that in a rec letter. Not the case here. Even the college counselor "off the record" told me that at least in prior years I would have been a better candidate and would have been admitted. </p>
<p>To just "throw in risk" to make things interesting makes no sense. Universities want their students to succeed and make them look good and grow up and makes lots of money to turn around and give back. I would think that would render them generally risk-averse. </p>
<p>Unless he has a personality transplant, throwing the guy I know into the mix will be about as interesting as adding a potted plant to the place. Of course, potted plants have their value, too. This is a joke. Just a joke.</p>
<p>You can try to explain an admissions mistake as "investing in potential" or "taking a chance," but at the end of the day there are in fact a lot of morons at the U of C. I'm not just saying this to make the deferred/rejected students feel better, it's true. Also, based on my first hand knowledge of the admissions office staff: Ted may be a genius, but a lot of the staff is packed with UChicago alums that either couldn't let go/couldn't get a better job. The best recent UChicago alums are working six figure jobs in NYC or pursuing a phd at Caltech or something similarly amazing, they aren't working at admissions.</p>
<p>that may be the case cesare, but im incresingly getting a picture of je_ne...that isnt very pleasant..either someone that is extremely judgemental and not willing to give someone that she/he doesnt like a second chance, or someone terribly jealous and not able to handle second place to someone she doesnt like. im sorry this is just the vibe im getting</p>
<p>"Even the college counselor "off the record" told me that at least in prior years I would have been a better candidate and would have been admitted. "</p>
<p>Interesting that they would share this information with you, je_ne. Was this the same professional that reviewed your essays?</p>
<p>OK, beefs and ohio<em>mom you can stop ganging up on me now. ohio</em>mom: the college counselor knows me fairly well, but she did not read my essays. I am inferring from your comment that you think she's incompetent if she thought I would get in EA, and I didn't, or she should have helped me more with my essays. My teachers, peers, some current college students and a UC alum read them, and liked them. </p>
<p>Sorry if I'm coming off so poorly. I'm really hurt and disappointed, and feeling a little (lot) bitter. It is hard to "come in second" to someone who I perceive to be less deserving, especially after working so hard for 3 1/2 years for this, knowing someone else hasn't, but "got" what I wanted. Not that you'll change your opinion of me now, but this college application experience has brought out a side of me that even I don't like. I'm trying to use humor to cope, but apparently I should leave that to the experts. Once again, I'm sorry. I probably don't deserve UC, and that's why I didn't get in. Bad karma. Thanks for putting me in my place. Now that I'm crying and feel like crap, I have to go do about three hours of homework.</p>
<p>If this internet forum provides you with a place to vent, let it be. Personally, I think you're doing a disservice to yourself and your psychological health to measure yourself up to somebody else.</p>
<p>As I've mentioned before, admittance is not the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow. Some are currently biting their nails and tearing out their hair over financial aid, wondering if this dream is worth the damage to their pocketbooks. Some of my friends can't even go to college-- I have a friend who learned he had cancer right after he completed his first year of college, and now, rather than playing Smash Brothers and drinking beer with his buddies, he's at home, depressed, going through rounds of chemotherapy, unsure of when and how he will finish school.</p>
<p>The time in my life after I received my admittance to the University of Chicago in December and before I went to school was not a particularly happy one. I was excited for my future, but I was scared to talk about it with my friends for various reasons not worth discussing here. I began to feel more and more detached from my high school and began spending more and more time alone. I had the acceptance, yes, but I still felt defeated by friend and family circumstances. Knowing I was attending a college the next year, specifically a college located in Hyde Park, was not of much comfort.</p>
<p>Keep in mind that a lot of people come to the U of C and learn how smart they aren't. Succeeding at this school takes a lot of self-confidence and an ability to separate academic criticism and personal criticism. So even those of us who are admitted and are able to attend, we we still have disappointments to deal with.</p>
<p>Thanks unalove. I've had this feeling all year (and I'm sure most of this year's applicants have too) that, if I just get in to college, nothing else matters. That everything will be great and suddenly the rest of the year will be sunny and happy and I'll have nothing left to worry about. Part of the reason getting deferred hurt so much was feeling that, even if I could get into Chicago RD, I was being robbed of that euphoric experience. I still look through the results thread and sometimes think, "If only that one had been me, what would I be doing right now?"</p>
<p>But you're right, there are always problems in life. Getting into a particular college does not suddenly add rainbows into the background of every scene in your life. I know that if I had gotten in, I probably would be really nervous now about other things, and in a few weeks that euphoria would probably wear off. I don't know, maybe I'm just saying stuff. I guess there isn't a real point to what I'm writing. Suffice it to say that, unalove, your post made me feel better =).</p>
<p>Unfortunately, my daughter and I share a "name" here on College Confidential. Tonight I finally had a minute and thought I'd poke around the web site a little. I am really quite surprised at the comments going back and forth on this thread. Some of you are so wise, wise beyond your years. Your advice is thoughtful, practical and supportive, for the most part. My daughter was deferred by UChicago, and is very disappointed, as I'm sure you have gathered. Still, spending time on this site seems to have exacerbated her already confused and hurt feelings, keeping her from "bouncing back" as I know she will. Underneath it all, I think she was looking for some support. So, she won't be back, at least not with my web site name! Thanks for all your help, wise young folks. I know you will go far and do great things with your lives, regardless of what college you attend. You will take your wise minds and compassionate hearts wherever you go. Any college will be lucky to have you!</p>
<p>unalove and adaman:
I think these 2 posts should be placed on the front page of cc, or in the "your account has been created email" that everyone gets when they sign up. It not only applies to UC, but to any college, or any job that one believes is"the pot at the end of the rainbow"
It is the type of wisdom parents would so like to give to the children, but can only come from peers or experience...thank you. Personally, I have copied and pasted them and emailed them to my senior!</p>
<p>Adaman, I can tell you exactly what I did on the night I was admitted to Chicago:</p>
<ol>
<li> Jumped around with glee as my heart raced. 2 min.</li>
<li> Called grandparents (grandmother was still alive at that point, congratulated me, still thought I was going to Princeton). 5 min.</li>
<li> Called other family in tandem to tell them the news. Congratulated me on getting into the University of Illinois. 5 min.</li>
<li> Called a friend or two who specified that they wanted to know. Some had already been deferred/rejected, so I tried to package my news as lightly as possible. 10 min.</li>
<li> Learned a good friend had been deferred. This was not the first time I got something that my good friend did not. Played guidance counselor with her, even though I knew she in part blamed me for her deferral, because I had competed against her for a spot on the newspaper and the literary magazine and had won both times. 30 min.</li>
<li> Looked over housing packet, had fight with mom over dorm I liked the most. Filled out housing form, requested single. 60 min.</li>
<li> Went out for dinner at our usual Chinese restaurant. 60 min.</li>
<li> Stared into space, unable to do work. 4 hours.</li>
<li> Went to bed.</li>
</ol>
<p>**</p>
<p>I remember telling select teachers and asking my friends not to publicize my acceptance. (My high school is extroadinarily competitive and our year seemed to be the Year of Deferrals). I also remember somebody who was deferred from her first choice school, somebody whom I considered a friend, and somebody whom I had not told of my acceptance came up to me in the hallway:</p>
<p>"So, unalove, I heard you were admitted to the University of Chicago. Chicago's such an easy school to get into... are you sure you aren't underselling yourself? I mean, everybody gets into Chicago. It's prestigious and all, but nobody in their right mind would actually go, 'cuz it's where fun comes to die."</p>
<p>Yeah, um, thanks!</p>
<p>For those of you keeping score, my Chicago EA admittance gave me about 2 minutes of unhindered euphoria before reality began seeping in. It further strained relationships with somebody I wanted to consider a good friend and it lost me another.</p>
<p>Great times.</p>
<hr>
<p>What was actually much more emotionally significant for me was my high school boyfriend's deferral from Harvard. I just remember sitting on his couch and cradling him while he cried like a baby. After he felt he had cried enough, we started talking about Keira Knightley and Richard Feynman. His deferral was an incredibly humbling experience for somebody so used to succeeding at everything, and I think it's made him into a better person. (He was admitted to Harvard RD, as it turned out).</p>
<p>Unfortunately, I think that je<em>ne</em>sais_quoi has been unfairly roughed up and feel a great deal of sympathy for her. This sort of disappointment is terribly hard for anyone to deal with and I think that a lot of us have failed to put her comments into proper perspective.</p>
<p>That being said, I know that someone as intelligent and self-aware as she is will find happiness and fulfillment regardless of where she decides to enroll. After all, as much as you may love or extol the virtues of UChicago, it ultimately matters very little where you go for your undergrad work. You will remain the same person you are now and will continue to grow and flourish whatever the environment, be it Uchicago or elsewhere.</p>
<p>Our lives are defined by the decisions we make and we will face far more important and heartrending decisions in life than what college to go to. </p>
<p>You are all embarking on one of the most fun and exciting periods of your lives and it would be a terrible mistake to start it with negative feelings and regret.</p>
<p>Ditto, tk89. Je ne sais quoi--there are a lot of wonderful kids who have found themselves deferred and denied this week. Some will end up at at the original dream school and others will move on to other incredible places.</p>
<p>It doesn't make this week easier. And bashing by an anonymous community? Meaningless!!! STUPID!!!! But that's the nature of anonymous boards.</p>
<p>Best of luck, many of us are rooting for you.</p>
<p>i dont agree.again i may be wrong, but when a person comes here, onto an anonymous board and criticizes somebody else for having gotten into a college undeservedly, and claims that they themselves shouldve gotten in, then it reflects badly upon their own character. if you consider me one of the "bashers", i apologize, and i truly hope je<em>ne</em>sais_quoi that you get in rd or that you get into another great school</p>
<p>Dear beefs: my daughter and I share an account name. She is going to register herself sometime in the future, and not be surfing the web for a while. I am very sorry if she said or did something offensive. I wish you all the best.</p>
<p>This is a difficult time of year - we must all remember to be kinder - evil parental bashers as well as stressed-out kids! Just remember ... if you list is solid, spring will bring many wonderful options.</p>
<p>je<em>ne</em>sais_quoi...your daughter never said anything bad to any of us, just that it seemed she was putting this other student down in the process of her grief with a defferal. i truly apologize if i in some way hurt your daughter and i truly hope to see her there in september so i can personally apologize.</p>
<p>Thanks, beefs. I'm really not sure where she'll be in September, but I think she is really wonderful kid with a lot to offer. If she ends up at UC, I'll be sure she finds you.</p>