Is it worth going to a more expensive college (extra 10k/year), if you can afford it?

OP you are well-spoken and thoughtful in your consideration of the pertinent issues, imho.

I think an extra $10K per year is worth it, for a school that is a particularly good fit and where you or your parents are not taking on extra debt. We would do that for our son, without hesitation.

It is probably a wise move to make the trek to WPI for an accepted students event, should WPI be in the top 1-2 choices!