Is this sentence grammatically correct? Notice the participial phrase.

Test Preparation
1

<p>When Albert Spalding was unable to continue his musical career, because of his death, I felt like it was the end of the world.</p>

<p>If not, how can I change it to make it better without changing its meaning?</p>

2

<p>I am not sure if I understand the intended meaning of the sentence. But if I do understand it, you could just eliminate the first comma, as it is unnecessary.</p>

3

<p>where's the participial phrase? i see a dependent clause and a independent clause.</p>

4

<p>Yeah, I'd say you could get rid of that first comma or revise it like this:</p>

<p>When, because of his death, Albert Spalding was unable to continue his musical career I felt like it was the end of the world.</p>

5

<p>Thanks. (10char)</p>

6

<p>No, no. For one, in bjc's sentence, there should have been a comma after "career".</p>

<p>But more than that, it sounds really strange to say "unable . . . because of his DEATH". I'm sure he wasn't able to continue most of the things that had to do with living "because of his death".</p>

<p>Much better:
"When Albert Spalding died, thus ending his musical career, I felt as if the world had ended."
-OR-
"I felt as if it were the end of the world when Albert Spalding's death cut short his musical career."</p>

7

<p>I felt like it was the end of the world when Albert Spalding's death marked the end of his musical career.</p>

<p>or if you like nice words</p>

<p>To me, it was an apocalyptic event when Albert Spalding's death marked the end of his musical career.</p>

8

<p>due to his death</p>