<p>UVa early decision seems a good strategy. But as some posters note, top privates do offer good need-based financial aid packages, and with your income level your son should get some good financial offers at schools like these. Once you have two in college, those offers will get better. So I would construct an application list that would have reach, match and safety schools; privates and publics.</p>
<p>As for the general question about the importance of undergrad schools, one variable identified above is the individual student. If she is a hard-working, motivated student, most selective schools, big or small, more or less expensive, can provide a platform for grad school acceptance. If she needs more encouragement, or tends to follow the lead of her social cohort, a more intellectual atmosphere, perhaps at a small or medium-sized school, could make a real difference.</p>
<p>Does Virginia have reciprocal tuition deals with states where the flagship uni offers bme? That might be another low-cost option.</p>