Is your Dream School a Nightmare? Is Your Safety Ideal? A National Reporter wants you

<p>Apparently I'm an animal : (</p>

<p>Whoa! This thread has gotten out of control since last I posted! I wanted to clarify for Montegut that my daughter loves the honors program mostly because honors kids get to live in a very cool dorm. She's only taking one course called "honors", and she spends less time on it than her other courses. All her other classses with the "animals" are VERY challenging. Apparently some of the animals are highly evolved.</p>

<p>I am following this thread, but don't expect to see many posts, because that is not what the OP asked for. OP asked to be emailed. Also "nightmare" might be a little strong. "Rocky "is more what my D, and perhaps others, are experiencing.</p>

<p>So sorry for the insult to the state "animals." Trying to get a laugh, actually. </p>

<p>I went to a private college, U of Miami, and believe me, the kids in the dorms were animals, so it's not limited to state schools. My friends in the honors programs got to live in apartments, which I didn't want because I like meeting new people, and I was afraid that I would burn out in an honors program, as I was a marine science/biology major.
I actually lived in the freshman dorm my whole college career. </p>

<p>My son is actually a normal, very social kid, who will rather enjoy the "animals", but would hate not being able to study. I thought an honors program at a state school might be a good fit, but am worried that it would be too rigorous and he would not have any fun. </p>

<p>In keeping with this thread, I guess I'm assuming that your safety has to be a state school, ie, affordable, easy to get in. Please enlighten me if I assume incorrectly.</p>

<p>Again, sorry for the hurt feelings and good for you kids that stay in school, state or otherwise.</p>

<p>^^lol. Montegut didn't appologize for calling state school kids animals but kind of reinforced it.</p>

<p>Yay for arrogance and eliticism!</p>

<p>My safety was a small private school (About $30,000 a year in tuition). I knew I could get in and that my tuition would be paid for because my mother worked there. I don't think you should pick your safety based on how easy it is to get in, though. If you're seriously not going to go there, why would you apply? In case it does end up being your only option, you just screwed yourself over because the only school you got into was the one you would never go to. I made that mistake and I wouldn't recommend it.</p>

<p>I got pressured by my parents into applying to that school and when they were trying to force me to go, I was very unhappy. Lucky for me I got accpeted into other schools with scholarships, so I actually had options. But don't put yourself in an unfavorable position and really consider where you're applying. Maybe your son should put more thought into his safety? Or you can persuade him state schools aren't that bad because you have to consider the possibility it'll be his only option. It <em>has</em> happened to people before.</p>

<p>
[quote]
My son is actually a normal, very social kid, who will rather enjoy the "animals", but would hate not being able to study. I thought an honors program at a state school might be a good fit, but am worried that it would be too rigorous and he would not have any fun.

[/quote]
</p>

<p>so your kid wants to party with the animals, and not be challenged...</p>

<p>no reason to pay $30,000-$40,000 for that experience...</p>

<p>Here's an example of a dream school nightmare that happened to a girl from our area. She came back to our high school and sat on a panel discussing freshman year experiences. This girl was convinced Northwestern Univ was the perfect school and she was admitted. Once she got there, she was shocked at the amount of binge drinking that went on around her, commenting on the number of ambulances that pulled up to her dorm. She thought many students were under a lot of stress. Her biggest mistake, in her opinion, was not visiting the campus during the school year. She visited during the summer. She transfered to DePauw at the end of the first semester. I'd heard,throught the grapevine, that she had all A's at Northwestern.</p>

<p>I think that any school will have its animals, binge drinking, etc.
Thats just a part of college life. </p>

<p>And I don't agree with parents being too overprotective of their kids and fearing that they will be consumed by college life. Let the daughters and sons make their own decisions.</p>

<p>Honors programs at state schools vary from place to place. The one at my school is really as challenging as you want it to be...I'm choosing to only take fun honors classes (Social Creativity Online, Concepts of Masculinity in American film and lit, Novels and Who We Are...those sorts of classes). You really just have to do your research on programs because some are more intense than others. There are even divisions within my uni's honors program that are more intense than others...you just have to look up the info.</p>

<p>LOL, absolutely agreed. Do you have any idea how many intelligent kids there are on CC (myself included) that are in state schools? I am at SUNY Binghamton, a public Ivy and a tier 1 school. We have some of the highest starting salaries in the nation straight out of undergrad and one of the cheapest/still top-50 business schools, as well as a well-reputed engineering program, all for under 20K a year, everything included. I don't mean to brag at all (I am trying to transfer for other reasons), but the people here are anything but animals. The drinking and the smoking (if that's what you are referring to) is a part of any college campus you'll ever visit, from the crappiest community colleges in developmental neighborhoods to Dartmouth (whose president supported lowering the drinking age to 18) and the other Ivies. Other than that, a state-school education differs little from a private-school education, save the much lower cost and possible under-funding in certain departments.</p>

<p>We, madame, are not animals.</p>

<p>Somebody needs a reality check.</p>

<p>Many colleges also have "residential communities" that are not honors programs but tend to attract the more motivated, academic students nonetheless. Sometimes such communities have themes (e.g., "Cultural Diversity," "Women in Science and Engineering"); sometimes they offer a broad variety of programming (guest speakers, classes, special events) that don't focus on any particular topic. For students who don't want the rigor of an honors program (or who would like one but don't get admitted), these communities can be a good way to meet other students who have come to college for something besides the keg parties.</p>

<p>Here's one directory to help find such programs: National</a> Learning Communities Directory</p>

<p>This IS me. I am at a great school, though I haven't taken any enormously interesting classes this term, i am hoping for better classes next term.
so this school was in "Colleges that change lives" and it seemed so perfect when i visited and it has solid and prestigious programs in the things i am passionate about...BUT i am so bogged down and i feel pretty depressed. i have a solid group of friends but for some reason i am very sad a lot of the time and spacey and i make myself feel terrible about my social situations and i feel paranoid about my situation. i dont see how it could get better but I DONT WANT to leave the school on irrational thought.
How am i supposed to separate rational and irrational thought? how am i supposed to know if i REALLY DO NEED to leave because i am not getting anywhere, or if i should stick it through.
Mostly, i am DREADING going back home for winter break because i am deathly afraid that it will be the hardest and most depressing feeling to have to come back here.</p>

<p>OH and my college is in the middle of illinois, versus NYC which i call home...</p>

<p>lilburrito....You should talk to someone there to help you decide if it's the school or you. You seem to be describing some symptoms of depression, which is a physical ailment. Could you go to health services? How about an R.A.? One of your teachers? CTCL are supposed to places where students get more attention so don't be afraid to talk to someone about your feelings.</p>

<p>lilburrito.... I understand where you are. I am from NYC as well, so I know what that rush is, how the world revolves around you and how the city seems to be where everything happens.</p>

<p>It's a different mentality being in the middle of nowhere (I am in the middle of nowhere upstate NY right now), and I agree with the poster above - talking to counselor may be the best idea. Sure, everybody feels homesick, but if it's spilling over into a depression, it may be time to take action.</p>

<p>To Montegut:</p>

<p>I actually turned down U of M (and a scholarship) to attend UCF in their honors program and I'm actually enjoying it very much. A lot of these honors programs have the potential to be very intensive, but the student can work the schedule so it isn't that way. Right now, I'm actually getting much better grades and I'm less stressed than I was in high school!</p>

<p>I've attended and worked at both a State school and a prestigious private University. I would have to say that over the course of most careers "the animals" at the State school Montegut referred to can out work, out create, out produce the "pampered pooches" Montegut seems to think are a superior class. </p>

<p>My kids are in honors programs and activities and we monitor and if anything gets out of balance we adjust.</p>

<p>Be cautious about letting a national reporter use your name. I spoke at length to a reporter a few years ago about youth sports, travel ball, and college recruiting. She put her own spin on the info to fit her agenda and much of what I said was taken out of context. </p>

<p>Now when you google my sons name you may find how much we spent on travel baseball and where we live!!</p>

<p>He was very embarrassed and that article has turned up in the strangest places in newspapers all over the country. I learned my lesson the hard way.</p>

<p>I'm not saying this particular reporter will use your name but this sure reminded me of my experience. </p>

<p>And..........son2 went to a college that wasn't even on his radar until fall of senior year and is loving it. Seems like the right fit and is really happy with all aspects of college life. But, I learned my lesson and am just enjoying his happiness, so I won't be responding to the reporter!</p>

<p>Thank you, DVM258, you glanced over my poor social skills and actually answered my question.</p>

<p>Good to hear that you can be stress free in an honors program.</p>

<p>Would prefer son to be with his socio-economic peers at a state school, but be academically challenged, while still being able to enjoy his college experience. Not drinking. He loves extracurriculars, and does swimming, fencing, video games, choir, movie critics club, and tutoring. </p>

<p>I took the other route, took the scholarship, not because I wanted the prestige, I didn't know U of M from U of Q, but because they offered the program I wanted to study, Marine Biology. It was the only college I applied to, because that's where I wanted to go. </p>

<p>I was miserable as I worked three jobs to pay my tuition, studied all the time to make sure I didn't lose my scholarship, as many of my dormmates partied to all hours, never studied, flunked out after their first year, and did not care that they wasted their parents' money. Thus my interest in an honors program with an honors dorm.</p>

<p>My brothers went to a state school, UT-Austin, and got fantastic educations. One became a doctor, the other a lawyer. They feel that the money from the sports helped make it a better college, being able to offer the latest in technology to their students. </p>

<p>Believe me, my son would not want to be with the rich preppie types. He won't even wear khaki pants with a sports jacket.</p>