<p>Louisiana, I’m truly sorry that you were hit by “sticker shock” and of course it feels awful to have to let your daughter down.
It’s important to remember that no matter how amazing our kids are, the financial responsibility for educating them at these wonderful schools always rests primarily with the family, and parents are expected to pay as much as they are able (and sometimes more). My income is small, and though we received generous FA, there was certainly still a contribution to be made. I took on freelance work in addition to my full time job in order to make up the difference. I cut out things that were not necessary, like restaurant meals and vacations. Instead of going to the movies (and I really love the movies), I take DVDs out from the library. And on and on… You get the idea… Many, many families here have made major alterations to their lifestyles to pay for prep school, because they see this investment as a priority. I feel your pain, but I do think it’s all about choices and priorities. You say that your income is 150k, and that ‘you spend what you make, but that you could certainly afford to live on less’. You also say that you cannot, and will not spend even $20k for her education. It sounds like a mixed message to me. I do hope that your daughter receives good news on March 10, perhaps more FA than you expect, or maybe a merit scholarship! If this is something you truly want to provide for her, please take a good look at all the angles before deciding that you can’t or won’t do it. For so many of us, it’s a choice we don’t regret having made. The benefits of this education are a really wonderful 'return on the investment ’ that we make. Wishing you all the best!</p>