<p>I just got an obnoxious call from someone I'm now picturing as Jerry Lundegaard in "Fargo:"</p>
<p>ME (with a virus, so not feeling too cordial): Hello?
HE: Yeah, hi, is this the parent of Child's Full Mispronounced Name?
ME: Who's calling, please?
HE: Yeah, this is David, David Kelly, and I'm calling with information about the SATs that the kids are taking this year.
ME: Where are you calling from?
HE: I'm David, David Kelly, with info that the kids requested for, um, the SATs they're taking this year. Am I reaching the parent of (Child's Full Mispronounced Name)?
ME: You're not identifying yourself fully enough for me.
HE: Well, is this Mispronounced First Name's mother?
ME: Where did you get this number?
HE (huffily): Oh, well, I didn't realize I was, uh, reaching someone in the, uh, in the Federal Witness Protection Program.
CLICK.</p>
<p>We're on the Do Not Call list, but we still get calls. So I *69'd and found out this company is doing a lot of this scammy calling, trying to get people to buy SAT prep software that they then have trouble canceling. Buyers beware!</p>
<p>A woman with an Asian-like accent who could pronounce our son’s name. (First and last names very common.) She said our son had signed up for their software at a school college fair. Our school doesn’t have a college fair.</p>
<p>She promised a 200 point increase in SAT and 4 point on ACT. (That would make him more than perfect on the ACT.) 30-day free trial but she wanted a credit card to “secure it.” If we keep it, it’s $169.</p>
<p>I asked questions to get as much info as possible so I could warn others. Then I told her that I didn’t give my credit card number over the phone to companies I did not know. She refused to mail me literature. Offered to take me through the process online. Told her the same thing about using my credit card online. She kept talking. I hung up.</p>
Got to admit I thought was kinda funny. Though I am sure you were probably too annoyed at the time to think so. My husband would have kept them on the phone for ever without actually giving them any information.</p>
<p>Sometimes it’s fun to see how long you can keep them on the phone. (Assuming that, like me, you don’t have A Life.) Hey, if they can waste your time, you can waste theirs right back. </p>
<p>I can imagine drawing this out reeeeeeeeally long. First, you start with, "SAT? What’s that? The “sat?” </p>
<p>And you just take it from there.</p>
<p>“Well, what’s the ACT? Well, if there’s an SAT, then why is there also an ACT? Can you explain what they test for? Has my child taken this? How do you know?”</p>
<p>For a couple of really funny telemarketer pranks, google the words “youtube telemarketer tom mabe” (no quotes, can’t post links to youtube here).</p>
<p>There are at least a couple. The one with the copy is hilarious.</p>
A friend was telling us about a friend of his who was himself quite religious. When a pair of some religion appeared at his door he happily let them in, got down his bible and sat down for a loooong ‘discussion’ about religion using his bible frequently to support his often divergent point of view. After that he noticed that when others from the religion would come to his neighborhood they would knock on his neighbors door but never on his. He mentioned this to his neighbor who laughed and told him his house was marked Took him over to his curb and it had some sort of mark there. </p>
<p>Presumably because he knew the bible so well he didn’t need saving ;)</p>
<p>^^^ The copy? Do you mean the transcription of the recording about the supposed homicide? That was great!</p>
<p>My late mom used to tell telemarketers they called in the middle of a funeral! Sadly, during one night of her shiva, some local real estate agent had the audacity to call and ask if the house was going to be on the market. My dad was polite-- I probably would have been a tat more blunt if I’d answered the phone.</p>
<p>That’s the one! (I meant to type “cop” not “copy”)</p>
<p>It goes something like (in a gruff cop-like voice):</p>
<p>“H-hold on just a minute, sir… (OK, guys, dust the place for fingerprints and get the body out of here!) OK, sir, now what did you say your name is? Exactly what kind of a business relationship did you have with Mr. Mabe? Where are you located? Where were you yesterday between the hours of…”</p>
Man I thought it was tacky when someone called right after my husband was laid off to ask if we were selling our house, or when the secretary from church called to ask if we were selling our trampoline after she heard my daughter broke her ankle in three places using it, and was on the prayer list for the resulting surgery. But that ^^ takes the cake. Some people - wow!</p>
:D</p>