We have joint accounts. We were 28 when we got married (together over 5 years) and making the same amount. I quit my job to go back to grad school full time, but almost 30 years later I’m still responsible for all of the household bills.
I don’t believe this is necessarily true.
When we first married, I already had bank accounts in this state and so did DH. We kept them this way for a long time and it had nothing to do with trust…and today is our 42 wedding anniversary.
The accounts remained single owner accounts for a while. At some point, we added each other to the accounts mostly because if/when something happens to one of us, we want the other to have ready access to the accounts without having to deal with probate.
We also titled our cars to only one person until maybe the last 10 years. Again…both names so that there aren’t issues if one of us goes to the great beyond.
Our kids never use checking accounts…so don’t know how they deal with this.
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The entire point of this study is to show causation: participants are randomly selected to be told to set up joint bank accounts or keep separate accounts. Those told to use joint accounts are happier.
In other words, forcing increased mutual financial dependency is good for the relationship. Think about it like other forms of enforced communication between partners, eg required pre-marital counseling in certain religions.
Based on what?
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As per the ScienceDaily article above:
Married couples who have joint bank accounts not only have better relationships, but they fight less over money and feel better about how household finances are handled… "They frequently told us they felt more like they were ‘in this together.’”
So…this is based on the reporting of the couples? What did they expect them to say? That they disagree about money a lot?
Sorry, but if this is based on self reporting, it’s just that…it’s self reporting from those included in this group…and honestly cannot be generalized to the whole population. My opinion.
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I went on to explain that my own children have separate accounts. My point was one reason why people would have separate accounts. Not the only reason.
I think the study is flawed. Joint accounts, separate accounts. Couples stay together, couples split. It’s more complicated than separate bank accounts.
Who knows what the key to long term success in marriage is. I was thinking that trust and being able to pay the bills is one.
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I agree!
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This is something we ought to keep in mind. Up until now, the person whose name is on the title, is who wasn’t lazy and decided to stay to fill out the paperwork. Some have been in mine, some in H’s and some in both. I can see why we should have them in both now.
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I’ll add that with online banking and easy transfer $$ apps and such AND online bill paying…it’s probably just easier (without account disruption) to manage the separate accounts they started with. 40 years ago (give or take a few years!) when many of us married you had a savings account and a checking account and you made weekly trips to the bank to deposit work checks.
Times are different in banking - and maybe/PROBABLY better!
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It is certainly possible that the study participants are not representative of higher income, more educated professionals (like the kids of CC participants), since as noted above the average household income is only $50K. But it is dangerous to dismiss peer-reviewed scientific research as flawed just because it doesn’t comport with your own anecdata.
What works for the elite, may be very bad advice for the general population, viz the concept of luxury beliefs:
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I’m not sure their research pot was well represented. I don’t remember - how many couples involved in the study???
For couples where one income earner has a significantly higher income, our financial planner suggests they not commingle their accounts.
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Interesting. I wonder if after 2 years, assuming the couples are still together, if they were forced to switch situations would their relationships change? In my opinion those who were required to have separate accounts introduce a level of reduced transparency and perhaps reduced trust into the relationship. They would have to figure out how to divide the obligations equitably rather than have a single budget. Money is often at the heart of many conflicts within the relationship and separate bank accounts seems to be a way of potentially creating conflict.
“Olson and her co-authors recruited 230 couples, who were either engaged or newly married at the time, and followed them over two years as they began their married lives together. Everyone began the study with separate accounts and consented to potentially changing their financial arrangements. This was the first marriage for everyone involved in the study.”
Check on your state’s laws. I can’t remember where we lived at the time but somewhere required us to both be in person when we went to sell the car because we were both on the title. Was a giant PIA because H was already working out of state and had to make a special trip back, and take time off work.
And back to the topic of joint accounts, our estate attorney already has told us to make sure our D keeps separate accounts if/when she marries.
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A little off topic. But it depends if your title reads “and” or “or” in terms of ownership. Ours are now titled so that either owner can sell the car. Both do not have to be present.
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That’s interesting. But I’m wondering if that attorney practices in a non community property state. We live in a community property state. My understanding is that regardless of who makes more, all income generated from salaries after the marriage takes place is community property and will be split evenly in the event of a divorce regardless of if the partners kept separate accounts. Assets held prior to the marriage, as well as inheritance, would be considered separate property as long as they were not co-mingled. Income generated by separate property (for example, one partner owned a rental house prior to marriage) would be considered community property, but in the event of a divorce, the property would still belong only to the original owner. In other words, separate property is the goose, but the eggs are community property while the marriage is in effect.
All of this is irrelevant in our case. We both came into the marriage with nothing and have no separate accounts. D1 and D2, however, both came into their marriages with separate assets that they seem to desire to keep separate.
@Nrdsb4 not an attorney. I didn’t say that. This was our financial planner.
And I think he is accurate for our state in terms of this issue. YMMV depending on where you reside.
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Of course, it is also possible that, since most or all posters in this thread are probably not paying to read the full article behind the pay wall, there may be some important details there that posters here are not aware of.