<p>My son has Asperger's, diagnosed at age 9 after many turbulent years. The diagnosis came as a relief to all including my son. Through elementary school and first year of middle he was on meds ... mainly to calm anxiety and to help focus. He was doing well in 6th but had issues with the meds, Strattera, (hot flashes, heart palpitations, lack of appetite, and general malaise) ... we took him off.</p>
<p>He has grown 6 inches and is a much happier conversant kid who is enjoying himself now. Generally speaking, going through puberty seems to have calmed his system.</p>
<p>His grades are now awful and the school does not have the wherewithal to know how to help a kid who is technically smart but has deep gaps. They understand ADD/ADHD but not AS which manifests itself in ADD behavior. ...another topic another day ... now to the question.</p>
<p>I am concerned about long term happiness and self esteem. He needs some sort of meds to be able to "perform" and stay on target in school. He is growing rapidly and is generally happy at the moment but I am concerned that his low performance will pull him down. His issue at school is that he is both bored and stressed ... but emotionally happy. He can not stay focused on the "talking heads" and then drifts. </p>
<p>Either I put him back on another med to help him with his current school, find another school which may or may not be better or costs $$$, or let him ride it out/figure it out with our help and support. Home schooling is not an option. </p>
<p>What grade is your son in now, and what grade level are his academics?</p>
<p>Have you had him evaluated by an educational psychologist to find out where his gaps are right now, in terms of what kids at his age level should be achieving? Maybe the gaps could be addressed outside of school, either with a tutor or a special after school program so that he could keep up with the work even if he can't attend very well in the classroom setting. I think a good educational psych could give you some guidance as to places that could help your son, whether he stays in school, or finds another school that is accustomed to working with kids with learning disabilities.
A consultation with a doctor regarding the meds and the side effects, dosage, etc. seems in order, as there probably is some medication that could help your son focus without causing so many problems.
If your son enjoys his school socially but just has problems keeping up with the work and getting grades, I'd be inclined to leave him there and do whatever it takes to help him be as successful as possible. The social environment is crucial to these kids, so if he has a good thing going that way-friends, gets along well, etc., and is emotionally happy, I'd be inclined to stick it out where you are.</p>
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He is growing rapidly and is generally happy at the moment but I am concerned that his low performance will pull him down.
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<p>Since you live in California, I wouldn't be concerned in the slightest with low performance in high school. As long as he is "generally happy", I would let him work things out on his own terms, in his own time. High school grades don't matter, he can go to community college, and if he does well, he can transfer to a great California state school. Medicating him to try to boost his grades just isn't necessary. I would strongly encourage intellectual interests he may have outside of school; making high school the focus for learning may be a mistake. (Not that I'm qualified to offer an opinion on these issues.)</p>
<p>kenf ... that is what I am thinking. Thank goodness for being in CA AND in Silicon Valley and for the Internet ...where i think he is learning more than in school ... except for social of course. </p>
<p>Cronie ... we have had all of the testing done etc. and have found doctors to be of little help. They tend to hand you the drugs and say good luck - call me if it does not work. There is no pat answer since every aspie case is different ... truthfully, it is really up to the parents to figure out. I have been at this for 4+ years.</p>
<p>He gets As on the tests but Fs on handing in homework, completing class material etc. I think I need to start making arrangements with the teachers to grade him differently. </p>
<p>THX menloparkmom ... He is a high functioning aspie and would not fit in. He is clever enough to be able to hide it to a point so you would never know it meeting him casually. You would just think of him as another nerdy teenager ... which actually is the problem at school. He masks it well and then the holes start appearing and the teachers are baffled that such a smart kid ..... etc etc. I have to remind them that only three years ago he was hiding in the bushes and picking his nose etc etc. I think time and patience will be the best remedy ... without medication ... let nature takes it's course??</p>
<p>Thanks for the thoughts.</p>
<p>If I remember you have(had) a child or two at N. It would be great if they had a regular lecture series about the gifted and different learning issues. Maybe they do and I am not on the mailing list! THX for the thought ..I have been in touch with O.</p>
<p>I would try meds again. There was something about Stratera that bugged my kid, and we quit it. Try something new, and by the time he's in jr. college he might be more functional. Good luck!</p>