leaving your significant other

<p>lol your GF wants to test the waters. Really a relationship tahts 3.5 months will not mean too much to her at this point. Let her go flirt and test the waters and if she finds no one that can measure up to you she will come back. If she doesnt, thats the risk you took getting into a relationship that late in the game.</p>

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We've been dating just 3.5 months...but I am so scared

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Scared of what? If you found 1 GF you can find another. You're going off to college/paradise, filled with unmarried and largely unattached women. And the converse is true for the women; filled with unattached men. Seriously, how many relationships that start in 12th grade do you really think last?</p>

<p>Keep in touch, and if in 4 years you realize you have never met anyone better you can get back together.</p>

<p>I think I'm an exception to a lot of cases, but here's my story anyways...</p>

<p>My bf and I have been together for 5 years (6 in the fall...), which is basically forever for a couple our age. In our senior year of high school we were really nervous around each other all the time because we were really worried about what would happen. We ended up taking a hiatus (not really a break, we were still together but didn't really hang out for a few weeks - due to IB coursework and applications coinciding, but also because we were scared!). In the end, we chose the same school but for different reasons, and it turned out to be great (plus we're still together!).</p>

<p>Having my bf at school was really fun - we lived in different houses so we weren't together all the time and we got to meet different people. We also got to calm each other down when the other was stressed, no matter what is was about - my bf's antisocial WOW-playing floormates or my annoying poli prof are a few examples. That being said, we fought a bit more than usual - I think it was the added stress of being together way more often without the interference and distraction of parents, siblings, living a longer way apart, etc. </p>

<p>I guess my advice would be to take it as it comes, especially in senior year when you're doing so much planning. If you end up choosing different schools, decide if you think you can handle a long-distance relationship. If you need to think about it (and ultimately convince yourself either way), it probably isn't worth it. If you go to the same school, you need to decide how much you value your relationship and set some boundaries if you are going to stay together - ie. don't be the clingy couple with no other friends! If you really want to be with somebody, you'll know.</p>

<p>If you're totally committed to it, it can work--I know three couples who started dating in high school, stayed together through college, and are now engaged. Two of them were long distance for 4 years and still made it work. Long distance doesn't have to be the end of the world, but it's not worth it if you're not ready to really put the energy into it; for those three success stories, I know of dozens of relationships that deteriorated and ended up burdening and hurting everyone involved.</p>

<p>I've been going out for about two months with my bf. We've jokingly talked about how we'll find other people in college. I think we both know and consent that at the end of the summer, we'll break up. It's easier for us that way because we'll put less feelings and expectations when we actually do decide to go apart. I think we both know that even though we like each other, it's too naive to say we'll be together forever. We'd also like to meet new people in college... I personally don't like to have to worry about what my bf's doing everyday when I have so much things going on in college. The only thing that will make me sad is that he is basically my best male friend, and I don't want to lose a good friend because of a relationship. As long as we'll stay friends, I think I'm fine with that because I'm not really "losing him."</p>

<p>^ Completely agree. Same thing happening right now with my ex.</p>

<p>Oh, one other piece of advice for people who break up with their girlfriends before going to college. DON'T HOOK UP WITH THEM OVER BREAKS. Seriously just don't.</p>

<p>D, a hs senior, has been w/ her bf for just over 2 yrs - - since she was soph and he was a senior. She applied ED and was accepted to college 20 min from flag-ship state u, where bf will be a junior next year. </p>

<p>They broke up briefly in the spring, but he showed up at graduation and now they're back together again. He's very nice (if a bit too serious), but I suspect that she will want to play the field while in college and that another break may be on the horizon.</p>

<p>I had hoped any break would be during the summer, so as not to interfere w/ transition to college.</p>

<p>I have been going out with my girlfriend for 2 years now and were about to enter our senior year. She is a deadlock for getting into U of Penn. and I will most likely go to either PSU or UMich. If I go to PSU it is like a 5 1/2 hour drive to Philly which is going to make things really difficult. We really don't like to talk about college cause we might as well have fun our last high school year together. Honestly, Im nervous and I wish life could be easier but distances make people different, so well have to see what happens. Wish me luck next year.</p>

<p>Good luck. It sucks, but if you both really want it, you'll find a way to make the distance seem shorter.</p>

<p>I hate to break up hopes of all you couples out there, but save yourself the heartache and just break it off with your significant other. You are 18 and will be meeting lots of new people. I'm not saying totally call it quits, but take some time off as you guys start school. You can't count how many high school couples crumbled within the first semester of college.</p>

<p>^That's what my (now ex) boyfriend and I did. He's going off to college this year, I'm stuck at high school. He'll be meeting new people and getting acclimated to college life, while I'll be applying to college and dealing with school work. We decided it'd be best for both of us to stay friends this year and maybe pursue a relationship once we are able to be together for an extended period of time. But my advice to people is that sometimes you can make it work, and if you are both set on it, might as well try.</p>

<p>Good luck w/that runforfun....just remember that you guys are not together anymore. Jealousy can be a real pain in instances like that.</p>

<p>what if you and ur bf/gf are going to the same college at the same time?</p>

<p>I think the one thing you can really do to keep your long distance relationship is to make sure that both of you are committed enough to agree not to have any friends of the opposite gender. I don't mean never being around someone in a group or something but not having an actual friend. In fact, I think it would make any relationship, not just a long distance one, stronger. Of course, both of you would have to be willing to do that and not feel that it's not worth it. But if you aren't willing to give that up you may want to reconsider how important the relationship is to you.</p>

<p>Just so you know where I am coming from, I am a rising senior in college who has been in a committed long-term relationship for almost two and a half years with about 9 months of long distance involved.</p>

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I think the one thing you can really do to keep your long distance relationship is to make sure that both of you are committed enough to agree not to have any friends of the opposite gender. I don't mean never being around someone in a group or something but not having an actual friend. In fact, I think it would make any relationship, not just a long distance one, stronger. Of course, both of you would have to be willing to do that and not feel that it's not worth it. But if you aren't willing to give that up you may want to reconsider how important the relationship is to you.

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<p>Bullshi* .</p>

<p>Worked out very well for us...</p>

<p>To expand upon my previous post (not that it doesn't say what I want to say very strongly), what acollegestudent said is just plain wrong. ***? If I had a girlfriend, I would be perfectly OK if she had male friends. In fact, I would be worried if she didn't. I'd like to think she was going out with me because she chose to, not because she wasn't in contact with any other guys. If the relationship is so fragile that a friend of the opposite sex will wreak havoc, then the relationship is not worth it. Seriously. You can be friends with a member of the opposite sex and not want to screw them. I would like to think that I'd be trusted to have female friends.</p>

<p>I could go on, but you either get my drift, or won't be convinced.</p>

<p>How insecure do you have to be to think the only way to make your relationship work is to cut off half of your SO's social possibilities? That's garbage.</p>

<p>I care enough about the people I date to not want to limit their lives that dramatically.</p>

<p>To the OP, there are some things in life that are worth going for. If you and your boyfriend can agree on a long distance relationship, there isn't any reason not to go for it. Worst case, you'll break it off, which is what would have happened anyway, except without the question of "what if?". Just be careful not to get so caught up in the relationship that you can't enjoy college. But go for it. You won't get anywhere in life if you don't take risks.</p>