<p>Hey everyone! I’m doing a college search project at my school, and would really appreciate it if you could help me out with certain criteria i need to find:</p>
<li><p>are there any metropolitan centers near UCLA?</p></li>
<li><p>what are things the town and surrounding communities offer? (i.e. good restaurants, movies, clubs)</p></li>
<li><p>what entertainment does the campus offer?</p></li>
<li><p>what are the placement statistics into grad school (where do undergrads get into, how much help do they get in getting into top grad schools, does UCLA take its own undergrads)</p></li>
<li><p>what are the placement statistics into jobs/internships as a 4-year grad? will UCLA help its students get an internship? </p></li>
<li><p>how successful are UCLA’s grads in the real world?</p></li>
<li><p>does UCLA have a placement center for either International Relations or Biology?</p></li>
<li><p>what is the placement rate for I/R and Biology into grad schools?</p></li>
<li><p>are there any I/R and/or Biology professors who have received honors and awards?</p></li>
<li><p>is there a support system for graduates?</p></li>
<li><p>are there any possibilities of classes and exchanges with nearby colleges?</p></li>
<li><p>are there any opportunities in related majors to I/R and Biology?</p></li>
</ol>
<p>wow~ i know that was a lot of questions to answer.
thanks for all your help! :)</p>
<p>“1. are there any metropolitan centers near UCLA?”</p>
<p>LA has a metropolitan aspect to it (depending on which part you are in) however people who seek out metropolitan cities are usually tools. You fail.</p>
<ol>
<li><p>San Francisco is a major nearby metropolis, while Mexico City isn’t too far away either.</p></li>
<li><p>The town is located in the middle of a desert and typically averages high summer temperatures of around 100 degrees…Celsius. There are no stores around and the nearest establishments off campus can be up to a two hour drive away. UCLA does offer a shuttle but it has no air conditioning and they charge you $21 each way.</p></li>
<li><p>The campus banned all forms of entertainment after a particularly egregious incident involving the dean’s office, monkeys, and duct tape. Dancing is prohibited. The only singing allowed is at worship services, which must be directed towards the titantic gold idol that sits on a pedestal in the center of the campus.</p></li>
<li><p>UCLA grads typically find it difficult to get into top grad schools, as nobody has ever heard of it before. Additionally, due to budget cuts the registrar’s office cannot comply with requests for transcripts unless a nine-month waiting period is satisfied.</p></li>
<li><p>UCLA is great for on campus internships, as the administration is too ****ty to hire actual professors and thus the interns are expected to teach classes at 1/10 the salary. Off campus, well, good luck, because your housing contract is paid for ten years (even after you graduate) and they can fine you up to $5,000 should you leave it unoccupied for more than a week.</p></li>
<li><p>UCLA grads have held esteemed occupations ranging from janitors to school cafeteria workers to cab drivers all the way up to being the general manager of Mike’s Mini Mart.</p></li>
</ol>
<p>7-8. Unfortunately, UCLA doesn’t offer any specific majors. The courselist is limited to nine classes, each of which is graded on a 15-25-30-20-10 bell curve and can’t be passed without a grade of “A” or higher.</p>
<ol>
<li><p>Yes! Such awards include a “Distinguished Steel Spike Award for Scientific Excellence” and the “Kansas Board of Education Award for Promotion of Creationism Theory.”</p></li>
<li><p>There are numerous pay phones on campus with direct links to student assistance services, which provide a direct connection to UCLA’s offshore call centre contractors in India. If you can get past the three hour wait, you might be able to hear a glimpse of the UCLA counselors slurping their morning coffee as they hang up on you before you can speak.</p></li>
<li><p>Students are not allowed to set on the foot of other college campuses, because heavens knows what would happen if they saw people actually enjoying their college experience! We do offer a ecology section in the high desert where students are left to fend for themselves for two weeks and whoever makes it out alive receives an A. The bell curve is still used, though, so occasionally some survivors must be eliminated to meet the curve. Sometimes merely a limb or two must be severed to make the exact fit.</p></li>
<li><p>With your UCLA experience behind you, you might be able to get a position as a laboratory assistant in the former Soviet Bloc nation of your choice. You will likely be assigned to handle highly radioactive substances at your own risk, and health benefits are not provided.</p></li>
</ol>
<p>I hope that helped clarify things for you! Good luck with the college process.</p>
<p>^
all true. Good thing this guy replied. Everyone else who replied before him just had some smart-assed comment. Now you’re going to get an A on your assignment for sure.</p>
Depends on major. Best opportunities currently are in accounting and engineering. UCLA will not pave a road for you to get an internship. A lot of the effort is required on your behalf to make connections, get good grades, and apply. (offers don’t come to you anymore, you compete for them)</p>