<p>I got moved to a room with AC because I was sick in my other room. This dorm is cool, but weird. It's in the lobby of the building, not in the hallway with all the other rooms. It just stands alone. I have my own bathroom as well.
Only downside is that there a door (locked from the other side) that goes in an office where the staff (RAs or something I guess) sit all night. But they never shut up. They scream and yell and laugh loudly all night. It's annoying, and there are quiet hours posted in the lobby, which they do not follow. Should I say something? How would I say something tactfully? I need to sleep too.</p>
<p>The RA on my floor last year was insanely loud and was always blasting music, so I understand your frustration. However, it is quite simple to ask them to be quiet. Just say, “hey guys I’m trying to sleep and was wondering if you could be a little more quiet.” They aren’t going to bite your head off and will most likely apologise for disrupting you. You need to learn how to speak up for yourself.</p>
<p>I am also in a room that is sort of off the lobby, and my RA doesn’t even live on my floor. It’s strange. I would just ask them if they could be a little quieter. They are housing staff, they know better. If you’re not comfortable with that you could always go over their heads to whoever runs the building to ask that they ask the staff to be more considerate when they are working at night.</p>
<p>It might probably be better for your relationship with your RAs if you spoke to them about it first before ratting on them to someone above them.</p>
<p>Well, the point in going over their head would be so that they wouldn’t necessarily know who was complaining, in case he was not comfortable with directly correcting someone in a position of authority, not just to rat them out.</p>
<p>I don’t want them getting angry with me for asking them to be quiet, and then being mean to me or something. Going over their heads wouldn’t be good, since I’m the only one who could possibly be complaining about it, there are no rooms anywhere near mine.
I don’t think they really realize I can hear them. They gossip about their residents and stuff, which is kinda interesting (albeit inappropriate), but someone said “I think the girl with the dog is f—ing ■■■■■■■■”. That would be me, as I’m the only one with a dog. >:( I’m not ■■■■■■■■, I’m shy and have been horribly sick for a week.</p>
<p>Have you tried ear plugs? They help and I’m sorry that you overheard the ■■■■■■■■ remark. The person didn’t mean for you to hear it and they would feel very bad if they knew that you had.</p>
<p>Wow, that’s pretty messed up about the “■■■■■■■■” remark. :(</p>
<p>Those are some pretty terrible RAs if they can’t even follow the quiet hours rule and talk about the residents in a disrespectful and insulting matter like that.</p>
<p>@twittermouse, just ask them to be quiet. They’re NOT going to hate you. Imagine if someone came to you and asked to to be quiet and you didn’t realize you were being loud. Wouldn’t you just say sorry and be quiet? The fact that they’re saying such things means that they don’t know that you can hear them. And as you continue going through college you re going to need to ask tons of people to be quiet. Lots of times people sit in the hallways having conversations and forget how thin the walls. Sometimes when people play their music in the night time, it may be soft but you can hear the bass across the hall. You can’t go through college being afraid to say when something bothers you because you’ll become quite miserable.</p>
<p>@Pea The person didn’t mean for me to hear it? How does that make it better? I guess I should just be thrilled that people call me names behind my back, then I should go out of my way to wear ear plugs, losing my strongest sense (I’m partially blind) and putting myself in danger because then I’m also deaf. </p>
<p>Now they keep messing with the door that conjoins their office and my room, which is giving me panic attacks. So until I can breathe, I have to stay in here with my dog.
Then I’ll try to ask them to keep it down a bit at night.</p>
<p>Make a point of saying goodnight to the RAs before you go to bed.
Maybe if they see you and your dog before you turn in they will remember you and puppy are sleeping on the other side of the wall.
Also learn their names, introduce yourself and doggie to them as you meet them.
If you have a name and the RAs have names then it is a personal relationship.
You need to gently assert yourself.
Get earplugs also- you can’t expect silence, but just a dull roar.</p>
<p>I don’t think the OP should have to buy ear plugs. I used to consider it but then I was afraid that I won’t hear my alarm in the mornings. In any case, the RAs should know when quiet hours are in effect and be quiet.</p>
<p>Does your dog happen to be trained in the art of neutralizing a target?</p>
<p>Again, ear plugs are not an option. I’m already going blind, I need to be able to hear at all times. </p>
<p>@DCHurricane - I wish! Sadly service dogs are trained as non-aggressive, and she would never even consider aggression. Sometimes I wish she would at least pretend to be tough though. :P</p>
<p>I agree with Batllo. Try to introduce yourself and your doggie (maybe drop a small remark about how the dog helps you since you are partially blind).</p>
<p>You shouldn’t have to resort to earplugs. Even more so since these are RAs you are dealing with.</p>
<p>You become friendly so that if they are loud, you don’t feel too bad telling them to quiet down since you are familiar with them. It’ll also teach them to be careful of what they say about how a person looks or acts, especially if they no NOTHING about them.</p>
<p>Mushaboom’s advice is good.</p>
<p>If that doesn’t work though, then complain to the person in charge of the building or of residential life. Clowns like that really shouldn’t have jobs like that, but it’s better to mediate it yourself (or at least try to) than to immediately run to the people in charge.</p>
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<p>What’s your problem? I was trying to be helpful and then you answer me like that. You’re right, I was trying to put you in danger by suggesting earplugs.</p>
<p>People say stuff and it gets overheard. Are you someone who can realize that things like this happen or are you someone that holds a grudge?</p>
<p>And no one gives you panic attacks.</p>
<p>Make some drama out of it. If I were you and heard that I was ■■■■■■■■, I’d go to the RA, cry on his lap, and go “I heard someone over the door call me ■■■■■■■■, and it’s really bothering me…”</p>
<p>If the RA is human, it’d accomplish a few goals:</p>
<p>1.) Indirectly inform him/her (in a non-confrontational way) that s/he is being loud.
2.) Remind him/her of his/her responsibilities as an RA.
3.) Show that you know what’s happening and that you mean business.
4.) Drive the RA into a guilt-trip.
5.) Make the RA pay for his/her behavior.</p>
<p>:)</p>
<p>@Pea You seem to think it’s okay for people to say nasty, untrue things about other behind their backs and as long as it doesn’t get heard, then it’s okay. That’s wrong, and that’s my problem.
Also, I shouldn’t have to wear ear plugs because they aren’t following quiet hours.
People can cause panic attacks in other people, if they do something that is a trigger to the other person. Maybe they don’t mean to cause an attack, but it can happen. I’m so glad you understand my disorder so well!</p>
<p>@Excelblue I kinda like that plan :)</p>
<p>I did tell the people in there that I could hear them all night, and they said they weren’t the ones there last night, so I guess it changes every night. I’ll just tell the next group tomorrow as well. Tonight once it was quiet hours (9:30pm) they quieted down in there, so that’s good at least. I also made sure to say hi when I came in the building, so they remember that I’m in there. From what I understand it’s not a room that’s usually occupied so maybe that’s why they forget anyone is in here.
To make myself feel better about the conjoining door (since that’s a panic trigger for me) I put my fridge in front of it. So hopefully that will be good.</p>
<p>Maybe I’m overreacting, but the RAs at my school are required to go through a series of trainings so that they’re capable of dealing with all types of residents, from those with disabilities to LGBTQ students to people with mental illnesses. I think all of them are aware of the fact that if many of us heard them EVER use the word “■■■■■■,” it would be reported, and they would lose their job immediately. [And maybe I am just overreacting, but I really intensely hate that word and feel disgusting just typing it. I work with a lot of blind and deaf students, which makes that remark even worse for me since every single one of them tell me about how often they’re called it. And, as you pointed out, just because you weren’t supposed to hear it most definitely does NOT make it okay. If someone doesn’t have the balls to say something to a person’s face, they have no right to say it at all.] At most schools, RAs get their room and board free, often with a stipend as well, so they should be treating their residents with respect.</p>
<p>If it were just the matter of them being too loud, I would say buck up and tell them to quiet down, but if they’re being such jackasses, feel free to report them.</p>