Major Predicament with a girl

<p>Alright, so I'm a senior in high school in San Francisco, CA. I've just met the coolest girl ever at work about a month ago. We both really like each other. We flirt all the time at work. We've hung out and stuff after work, and I really want to ask her out. I have two major problems though. She has a boyfriend (that's she's been with for a year). He's a major pothead and he raps (whiteboy in the suburbs). Her dad hates him. The thing is she has NEVER told me she has a boyfriend. Like we've even talked about the people we've dated, and she doesn't mention the fact that she has a current boyfriend. Whenever I'm with her, she doesn't answer her cell phone. Then there is the another problem. I'm going to Georgetown next year, and she's staying here in the Bay Area to go to college.</p>

<p>I know people say long distance never works, but god I would try soooo hard to make it work for this girl. I KNOW I can trust myself not to cheat on a girl. I know she won't be living in the dorm in her college, she's going to live in an apartment near her parent's house. So maybe that would lessen the temptation. Obviously, its all really up to her if she wants to dump her boyfriend for a guy that's leaving in 3 months. I'm just looking for advice here. Thanks in advance.</p>

<p>I'd say you should be careful with her. You may feel sure that you won't cheat on her when you go off to college, but how can you be positive that it's a two-way street? The fact that she has a boyfriend but never mentioned it to you is a bit disconcerting and doesn't speak well to her trustworthiness.</p>

<p>Of course, you know her better than I do, but that's my opinion in a nutshell based on what you've posted.</p>

<p>May a mom offer an opinion? Ask her out, you will quickly see if she is really interested. If she is and you date this summer go to college with it understood that while you like each other and will stay in touch both of you are free to date others. I think be willing not to date in college after dating someone for only 3 months is really a bit restrictive. Just one mom's opinion.</p>

<p>Don't date anyone. You'll just get hurt. Instead wait for the days when scientists find ways to make a perfect copy of yourself with the opposite chromosones and all of your memories. Remember Dolly? Pefect intimacy is not that fall away.</p>

<p>Thanks for the advice guys,and cmbmom yea I would be open to allowing each of us to date others. When it came down to the time I had to leave, I would let her decide what she wanted. If she didn't want to do long distance, or did but with freedom to date others then I would do it. And littleearthiest you could be right about her not be trustworthy in that sense, but I don't think so. I think she just isn't that happy with her boyfriend, and really likes me. I know her friends like me WAYY better. I'm gonna call her and talk to her about everything. I should do it in person, but I'd have to wait till next weekend, and we just had a really good time this weekend. Wish me luck.</p>

<p>It wont work. Just forget about her once you go.</p>

<p>Never start a new relationship at this point in your life. Perhaps even end those you've started, if they're not genuinely meaningful. That's kinda my rule of thumb.</p>

<p>forget about her. shes trash.</p>

<p>just watch out for her bf. i mean you are stealing her away from him ya know.</p>

<p>K, I called but she was busy and didn't really have time to talk. When I tell her how I feel, should I be direct and ask her about her status with her boyfriend and if she's fair game? Or should I just tell her how I feel, and let her bring up the boyfriend? Or do I talk about both?</p>

<p>She's just another lame girl, nothing to worry about. Its her fault for being so dumb that she's with a stoner. You're in San Francisco, there are THOUSANDS of sex-deprived straight girls that are tired of those metrosexual (closet homo, no offense) guys.</p>

<p>If she's not telling you she has a boyfriend, she's lying to you which means you shouldn't talk to her deceitful ass.</p>

<p>You're going to Georgetown.
She's going out with a stoner loser.</p>

<p>You're better than her. Deal with it. I'm sure you'll find a nice girl that has her **** straight (yeah right, it isn't possible).</p>

<p>Ask her out, she'll probably dump the other guy and you guys can have a fantastic summer. If things work out well enough, you'll stay together, or choose to end it logically , otherwise it won't matter if it doesn't work out.</p>

<p>Another mom here--I agree with the sentiments of Deluxe--although I wouldn't have put it in quite those words. First, she's in essence cheating on her bf by the attention she pays to you--and if she's cheating on him, you can't trust her not to cheat on you. Second, if her taste in men is so bad that she goes out with a drug user that her friends can't stand, it doesn't say much about her judgment. Third, you are about to attend an awesome college and the last thing you need is a hth (does anyone still say "hometown honey"?) with the two above-described strikes against her.</p>

<p>Best of luck in Georgetown--you'll thank us in a few months!</p>

<p>Ew...she doesn't sound like she's worth your effort at all. </p>

<p>As dg5052 said, she's apparently got shifty taste in guys (I'm assuming that you aren't a pot-smoking-white-rapper-type, yourself), has no problem sneaking around her boyfriend's back with you (and possibly other guys as well), and you're going to be starting a brand new life with thousands of new people to meet and get to know. </p>

<p>She may seem awesome at this point (from the sounds of it, though, you're probably giving her way too much credit), but the circumstances surrounding that whole issue aren't the greatest to get involved in.</p>

<p>Umm guys...nothing wrong with dating..its not like he is going to jump in marriage.. Just ask her out and see how she really is.</p>

<p>If it doesnt work, then it doesnt work.</p>

<p>If you are dude, then dont tell a girl how you feel about her FIRSt. you will just put her in an awkward position. Just ask her out. Say someting like "Im going to this great ___(concert/restaurant), wanna come with me?"</p>

<p>About her bfirend..if you want to go for her..just watch out.</p>

<p>
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Umm guys...nothing wrong with dating..its not like he is going to jump in marriage.. Just ask her out and see how she really is.

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<p>Meh, I just don't see the point in dating people that have that many issues. Dating is supposed to be fun...this just sounds like a big bunch of drama waiting to explode.</p>

<p>Some questions regarding her behavior: </p>

<p>Does she only flirt with you or is she that friendly with everybody? </p>

<p>Would you call her personality "bright and sunny" at this point in your friendship with her? </p>

<p>Also, are you 100% sure she has a boyfriend? Don't cringe at this, but you might want to invite her and her boyfriend to go out sometime. I think how she reacts will tell you a lot.</p>

<p>what kind of relationship question is that?? dude, just chill and ask her out. who cares if she rejects u? what is she? a queen or soemthing?</p>

<p>personally i wouldn't fuss over a girl unless she's the ultimate beautiful, the modest, humble, submissive, inexperienced, secluded girl.</p>

<p>Hai, hai. As Sauron said, I wouldn't fuss over a girl unless she was seductive, and a tom-boy braggard who was learned in martial-arts, could turn into a bat and had the strength of ten women. In other wards, a female version of myself.</p>

<p>Ok, so I realize my description of her isn't that great, but she's really cool. Honestly, I think she's flirting and hanging out with me because she wants to make sure I like her. She's not going to dump her boyfriend (even if he's a loser) if she isn't sure as to whether or not I like her or if I want to go out with her. And Nevea, she really only flirts with me. Her friends say its completely obvious how much we like each other. And to be honest, I don't care what type of school a girl goes to compared to the one I'm going to. She's super down to earth, cute, really nice, and funny. So yea, I'm just gonna ask her out, and if she can't leave her bf then I can look forward to Gtown. Thanks for the advice tho.</p>

<p>You know, I realize something. If you've got to question should you ask a girl out, you probably shouldn't.</p>