Making Friends as a Sophomore is Hard

<p>How do I make friends as a Sophomore? I mean, I've always been a pretty a-social guy, but in highschool it was pretty easy to at least make one or two friends because it was a social setting with seeing the same kids in many of your classes, and in college it feels so different.</p>

<p>I went through my whole entire freshmen year without making any friends and was wondering how I don't make the same mistake this year. Typically I'm the type of person that says absolutely nothing to anyone the entire semester. It's not that I'm a jerk or anything, its just that I'm really shy and uncomfortable in social settings. My summer semester just started and I'm trying to communicate with people, but things just aren't clicking. Being in an apartment now, I don't really have any roommates to regularly talk to.</p>

<p>Has any one experienced a similar problem and overcame it? I'm really just looking for some advice. Should I just try harder to be more outgoing?</p>

<p>“Typically I’m the type of person that says absolutely nothing to anyone the entire semester. It’s not that I’m a jerk or anything, its just that I’m really shy and uncomfortable in social settings.”</p>

<p>When you do this, you give off a vibe that you don’t want to talk to people. You’re going to need to get over that.</p>

<p>I’m really trying this semester though, so maybe I just need practice I guess. Eventually I’ll get around it.</p>

<p>Wait did you have roommates during your freshman year and even out of those people, you didn’t make one friend?</p>

<p>Yea I had a roommate in my freshman year but he didnt really even live in the dorm, which was nice because I basically had a room to myself, made studying easy but yea he didnt even live there.</p>

<p>you sound like me kinda. I would say make a few good friends and try to branch out to meet more people by going to parties, joining clubs or a sports team, or talking to more people in class. I guess its hard to change your ways if ur not a social person but you have to try if you aren’t. I have accepted that i’m not a social person but i have a few good friends from school (transferred after 2 years at CC which was rough on making friends but had a few friends transfer there too).</p>

<p>You live on a floor with a bunch of college freshmen just like yourself. </p>

<p>How did you not make any friends from kids on your floor?</p>

<p>Do you make, at least, acquaintanceships from your classes/floor mates?</p>

<p>Well, first, you gotta want to. I’m a fairly introverted person myself, and I really didn’t like most of the people at my previous college, but I was still able to make a few friends to spend some time with. Go to the student center and just sit down and talk to someone about whatever, or go to the gym and ask someone about their workout routine, or something. I know it’s pretty bewildering, but if you don’t like the way things are, you gotta change it.</p>

<p>get on Facebook and randomly message someone who’s going to be in your sophomore class</p>

<p>Try working in groups with your classmates on assignments and such. I’m an engineering student going into my second year and I pretty much made all my friends by going to the computer labs and just working with the other guys in my classes on assignments. You start working on homework assignments and eventually just start talking about anything and everything. You’d be surprised!</p>

<p>Although this isn’t a quick fix to your problem why not get a job in your spare time where you’re constently interacting with the public? I worked as a teller at a credit union for two summers in my final years of high school and I found that it really help me become more open and sociable! I was never a loner and always had a great group of friends but I just found around new people and people I didn’t know I was very shy and quiet and it usually took me a little while to become open with them but once I was familiar with them I was a very talkitive guy. Working at the credit union really made me more sociable and talkitive even with the most random people. Definitely a great experience!</p>

<p>“Typically I’m the type of person that says absolutely nothing to anyone the entire semester. It’s not that I’m a jerk or anything, its just that I’m really shy and uncomfortable in social settings.”</p>

<p>The above will continue to make it difficult for you to make friends throughout your life unless you find a way to become less shy. Fortunately, shyness is one of the easiest behavior concerns to change. Check out the shyness.com webpage for information and research by one of the world’s top social psychologists, one who has researched shyness for years.</p>

<p>I also used to be extremely shy, and remember how hard it was for me to meet people in college, so this post is coming from someone who has been in your shoes.</p>

<ol>
<li><p>Go to your college counseling center and get some help. It should be able to teachb you social skills which will make it easier for you to make friends. I used to be a counselor at a college counseling center. We were able to help many students similar to you.</p></li>
<li><p>Become involved in some activities in which you have to interact with others. Join an intramural athletic team or take a class at your school’s gym. Volunteer with your campus theater organizations. If you’re not a performer, check out the volunteer opportunities back stage. Trust me: every production will welcome help backstage, and it’s a great way of meeting people. Ushering, helping with props, helping make sets, etc. all are great ways of meeting others, and due to the fact that you’ll be working as a team, it will be easy to talk to others because you’ll have things to talk about: the show and the task you’re working on, and those conversations will branch into more personal things. Getting involved in campus community service projects is another great way of meeting people. For instance, my son, who is a bit shy, made friends by helping with campus efforts to feed the homeless and participating in their dance marathon. </p></li>
<li><p>Practice having a friendly expression on your face. This doesn’t mean walking around grinning like a clown, but it does mean turning your mouth’s corners up slightly, and greeting people who, for instance, you sit next to in class or see in the hallway of your dorm. Having a blank expression or avoiding eye contact causes others to incorrectly view you as someone who doesn’t like them or isn’t interested in talking to others. Most people characterize themselves as shy, so aren’t going to go out of their way to be friendly to someone who seems not interested in making contact.</p></li>
</ol>

<p>College provides many opportunities to continue making friends through graduation and afterward (through alumni activities) In fact it’s the perfect way of learning how to get over shyness and reach out to others, so do take advantage of it. p</p>

<p>Also use the search function to find the many threads on this subject. You definitely aren’t the only shy person who’s had difficulty making friends in college.</p>

<p>this is too easy. Ask yourself what you love to do, what is your passion?</p>

<p>Is it sports? then join an intramural team.</p>

<p>Is it reading? join a book club</p>

<p>Is it sailing, swimming, politics, religon? get the picture? Get active and sorround yourself with people that like what you like. And the friendships will follow.</p>