March 19 [it's just a feeling everyone has i guess]

<p>March 19. It’s a sunny day.</p>

<p>I’ve come so far; far enough that I cannot even remember my past. So many cities I’ve been to, so many roads and streets and paths I’ve tread upon, and so much effort I’ve put towards a dream that I’ve been dreaming of for thousands of days and nights.</p>

<p>And now it’s March 19. Only ten more days left until I reach this period’s final destination. I want a good ending for this long and amazing story. A good one.</p>

<p>I still remember the day I went to the SAT test center in Madison. My feet were buried in the snow-covered road ahead, and I trudged step by step through the thick, frosty layer. I couldn’t get a cab, so I walked several miles. I didn’t eat breakfast, but I knew I had to take this test and succeed.</p>

<p>I do not think I have ever been defeated for any reason. But today I feel afraid. I am feeling a confidence that I once thought was everlasting, along with my own being, fading away into the sands of time. It’s a terrible feeling, and thank God I didn’t feel this way when I was typing up my personal statements and filling out my college applications.</p>

<p>But I just feel so horrible right now. Using a public computer to type this piece of trash, I feel so horrible.</p>

<p>I talk to Neal everyday, and he infects me with his worries and pessimism. I tried to get rid of this kind of worrisome mood by traveling to Los Angeles, a city of falling angels. I met Bill showing me the girl he liked, I saw the sunset everyday as I stepped out of my house close to Venice Beach, and roller coasters brought me a weightlessness which freed me from my taut heart.</p>

<p>But all those worried feelings came back when I got off the plane in Chicago.</p>

<p>I wasted $1000 dollars. Cool. Very nice!</p>

<p>Eventually, the spring of 2009 came. When I saw all the snow gone, columns of wild geese flying back from the south, and sunny days all week long, I thought things should have a good ending.</p>

<p>I do not think that all my credentials should be ruined by a mere SAT score. Yes, my SAT is far bellow the bottom line of Ivies, and my dad told me to concern myself with this matter when I was thinking about my college applications. All my prior work, years upon years of it, seemed worthless when faced with a unsatisfying SAT score. But I do think that this vast and varied experience could really bring me success if I am given the opportunity. It should also bring me the confidence I deserve to expect a great harvest from my toil.</p>

<p>I have gotten letters of recommendation from two Harvard professors, and I could ask for more if it were really necessary. I am a leader of a great organization in Shanghai which has been around for 3 years, and I am now in the 4th term of my presidency. I posted 1,000 posters across the entire Harvard Yard. And I could tell you of my experiences in Cambridge, Boston, New York City, Los Angeles, Philadelphia, Tokyo, Chicago, Hong Kong, Singapore, and some other places that I have already forgotten.</p>

<p>Don’t all of my personal essays, test preparations, résumés, interviews, fictional writing samples, and sleepless nights count for anything? Mustn’t all that at least mean something?</p>

<p>I understand the meaning of “C’est la vie,” but I think life also includes something good, even if it is just a tiny bit.</p>

<p>Forgive my arrogant “boasting” about what I have done. You may also think that, to you, these are not even achievements, but I do feel so bad and terrible as the waiting months seem so endless. Please pardon me for my despair.</p>

<p>I am so weak, for I still want to hope for something good.</p>

<p>Gaga thinks my note on Facebook “the longest journey has its time, and even if it’s an odyssey, we shall still reach Ithaca” romantic, and I agree with her.</p>

<p>Haha bot. Very poetic though.</p>

<p>Poetic ■■■■■■… no scratch that. Anonymous masters of dry sleepy poetry make me… sleepy… my head is coming closer to the keyboard… closer…ofaiaiaiffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffgyuyuyuyuyuyuyuyuyuyuyuyuyuyuyuyuyuyuyuyuyuyuyuyuyuyuyuyuyuyuyuyuyuyuyuyuyuyuyuyuyuyuyuyuyuyuyuyuyuyuyuyuyuyuyuyuyuyuyuyuyuyuyuyuyuyuyuy</p>

<p>what the hell are you talking about dude</p>

<p>This has all the poetry of a soap opera. Melodrama is not poetry.</p>

<p>I understand what you mean entirely. Best of luck to you =)</p>

<p>ditto to market state…</p>

<p>so, how ‘bad’ was the sat score?</p>

<p>1900…i am an international student though…smaller chance, isn’t it</p>