Match Me: NY Resident, White Female w/ Hispanic Background, 75k ish [NY resident, 95% GPA; pre-med, biology]

Chance Me / Match Me!
101

First of all, a few of you many have seen my post with a chance me which I promised I would update, and here it is!

Report card came back: 96.7% unweighted average. I am very upset i couldn’t get to a 97 but its way better then my unweighted average last year (93.5%) so ill take it. 99% in physics and 97% in human body systems, dragged down by an 88% in AP English. All unweighted.

Andddd the PSAT 11. 1330. Idk what I expected because I was sick, I didn’t try, and it was my first ever ipad test. I sobbed out of shame it was embarrassing af but i didn’t care. I nearly threw my ipad across homeroom. I know its humiliating, im not putting it in the title its so humiliating. I will spend the rest of my free time prepping and i will put my heart and soul into this. I got a 1450 before on a practice and I can do it again but more, better. I will get above a 1500 and nothing less will be personally acceptable. I will never forgive myself for this shameful thing. And i cant even talk to any of my friends or cousins about it because they scored lower and I dont wanna make them feel bad. I can’t believe I once thought this was good, its not good when so many people have better. Horrible, I know. I did qualify for the merit scholarship tho.

Demographics:
-Female
-15 y/o (junior)
-White w/ hispanic background
-NY Resident
-Family income: probably 90-110k per year idk

Classes:
-APs: 3 (i plan on 2 more senior year, we dont get a lot offered to us)
-Honors: 14 (idk more next year)
-GPA: 96.7 unweighted, idk weighted
-Got principals list last year

Extracurriculars:
-Biomed Club,
-Campus Ministry, leadership position, raised lots of money
-Clippers in Action/Key Club
-Varsity Tennis, 4 Years, 2023 season finalists
-“Stop the Bleed” Certified
-AHA AED and CPR Certified
-Accepted to and attended Adelphi’s Pre-Med summer program
-Attended a Pre-Vet program in London, i dont wanna be a vet anymore
-Track 2 years
-applying for internships this summer

Other:
-Work in my babci’s traditional polish bakery
-Work in a restaurant
-Taught tennis over a summer
-Kickass Rec Letters bc
-really good essay planned

I was suggested a lot of nice places in my last post, but I talked it out with my parents and im not allowed to go to a suny school. All other suggestions that aren’t urban I took into consideration. Looking for a school with a good biology or pre med classes that is not urban. Please no urban schools.

Last thing, what makes me so upset is seeing other people do better then me. I cant stand it, I absolutely cant stand it. Its bad I know but it fills me with such unbearable irritation when someone gets a better score. If someone else can do it I can do. My counselor says ive gone crazy and maybe she’s right. I dont care about anything but college, and I care a lot about college, help

102

First, I’d avoid saying this kind of stuff… it’s toxic and could really hurt anyone who’s at or below your current score. And no, a 1450 is not “shameful.” Just take a deep breath and calm down a bit…

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103

Maybe it’s the age thing, or the recent testing, but your level of anxiety is not healthy right now. Calm yourself by taking a walk outside. Get an adult coloring book and put on some soothing music. Anything to get a grip, relax somehow and move on. It’s a learning experience. Take the information that you’ve learned and use it to your advantage.
You need to speak with someone (minister, confidant, etc.)because you cannot continue to berate yourself because of your scores. They are fine. Your ECs are fine.

I am really concerned about your statement:

You’ve selected premed, an uber-competitive concentration, where there will ALWAYS be top-of-the-line students. ALWAYS. . . . Someone will always be better than you. That’s just the way it is. It’s better for you to learn how to deal with that now, and then “let it go”.

I think it’s a mistake not to apply to the SUNY schools since it’s possible to be shut out of all the other schools that you apply to. It does happen.

Our middle daughter did the med school route. Fortunately for her, she completed her undergraduate degree at UC Davis. This is a school that is well- known for encouraging collaborative study. The students work together and study together and encourage each other to get the best grades and volunteer placements.

It’s mentally healthier for them when they apply to their medical schools because they congratulate each other’s accomplishments. They support each other. Our daughter did get into her medical school program, and a lot of it had to do with how healthy her attitude was towards herself, friends and patients.

Medical schools reject a lot of students who are “perfect” because the schools just don’t have the room. The personality comes across in the interview, as well as a panicked anxiety. If you really think you have a future in this field, then you need to learn how to calm down because you will be facing a lot more hurdles that are a lot worse than a test score.
Our daughter had to deal with body bags in refrigerated trucks during Covid. That’s harsh on anyone regardless of how calm they are.

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104

I will, thanks

105

I would gladly consider sunys, its my parents who wont allow it.

I wouldn’t really say it’s anxiety looking back- its anger. Or frustration. Unbridled borderline-hate for people who do better and at myself for letting myself get one-upped. Its a strong drive to improve. And yeah i know its a problem but idk what to do

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Learn from others by talking to people. If need be, talk privately to your pediatrician and get a referral for mental health support. Not saying you need it, but it can be an option.

Hate is a very strong word and emotion. You wont be admitted to any medical school if you intend on spewing “hate” upon colleagues who out-perform you. You need those colleagues on your “team” to work collaboratively with them on shared patients.
Our daughter came back from a wedding in Brazil (summer) whereby the groom had ill elderly relatives, who couldn’t come to the states for a wedding, so it was a destination wedding but during part of the trip, the friends all stepped in to help the groom to examine some of his relatives and their elderly friends. The friends gladly stepped in to help. Each colleague had different strengths, specialities and approaches to treatment. The friends all knew who was better at certain specialities/diagnoses. They worked together as a team.

This Thanksgiving week, our daughter is flying out from CA to NY because this location is “central” to her med school classmates who have wanted to meet since graduation and are all over the world. You need that kind of support and interaction. Hate has no place in treating patients.

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107

The best part of being an adult is taking pride and deriving joy from people who are better…and do better…than you.

At my 10th college reunion we heard about the first 7 figure gift to the college from someone in my graduating class. There were people…yes, lots of doctors…who were still doing fellowships in their specialty, and a guy we knew…a perfectly ordinary student in college, had just donated over a million dollars. I was doing fine professionally at that point…but was hardly in a position to donate a thousand dollars, let alone a million. Some classmates went crazy…they were still paying off undergrad loans and here’s a guy already making millions at 32 years old.

It’s a choice…get aggravated and upset, or celebrate. I chose to celebrate (he was a nice, generous guy) and have never looked back.

Someone is always going to be smarter, richer, prettier, has a bigger house or nicer car. Choose to be happy for them and you can pretty much guarantee a great life for yourself!!!

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Hate is a strong word, I didnt mean to use it, sorry. A good way is that I am frustrated at myself because if someone does better than I could have improved and I didnt.

I dont like putting it this way, but within my school I dont have any science related competition. I am at the top of my biomed and physics classes, and i eagerly help others because its what I like to do. Again, i just feel upset with myself if there was room/opportunity for improvement and I didn’t take it

Congrats to your daughter!

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@twogirls @ClassicMom98 @helpingthekid73 heres the update

110

This is absurd! SUNY Stonybrook is probably your best option, your best value. I hear that grandma is willing to pay for school, but couldn’t the extra 200-250K be put to better use than to pay for private or OOS public, when you’ve got at least 4 great SUNY U’s, plus Genesco, all for about 100K total, in state?

Maybe you should take your parents on a road trip to go see Stonybrook and Albany and Binghamton and Genesco? Buffalo is kinda far.

Have they heard some nightmare story about drugs at SUNYs? Of course there’s drinking and drugging at every college in the country, except maybe an extremely conservative religious college.

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111

Our daughter went from San Diego to SUNY Buffalo. I think that’s a little farther than upstate NY. If the parents aren’t willing to consider it, then it’s their huge loss, both financially and academically. There are NO guarantees that the OP will get into OOS schools. Plus, they will need to rifle Grandma’s account, yet again, to pay that $400,000 for med school.

They should visit Buffalo. It is a very underrated school but is strong for Bio and Engineering. Yes, it gets cold, but the university does an awesome job of keeping their students warm and busy. Ours came back educated, confident and happy.

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112

They think “i can do better then a suny”. Plus the drugging stuff yeah.

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I hated the city of buffalo, never saw the campus tho. And distance is no longer an issue

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Please nothing urban. I will be miserable.

Plus the shame of looking at everyone else’s match me’s and them getting told they have great profiles, and they dont get recommended sunys or other 70%+ acceptance rate schools. Ive never felt so let down and inferior academically before. Sigh

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The school is in Amherst and not necessarily in the City of Buffalo. The community didn’t feel very “urban” and the people were very nice. Felt like a small town. The school and dorms were well maintained. I don’t remember an issue with drugs at Buffalo. You do you. She never had those issues. Her dorm floor mates were respectful especially during her junior and senior years.

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116

Well then Stonybrook is your safety, and your financial safety. Just put in the application - if when you’ve got all your acceptances back in hand, you have an option you would take over Stonybrook, fine. You don’t need your parents’ permission to apply to Stony Brook. But what I am afraid of is that you won’t make a financial safety, and then somehow, the money isn’t there when push comes to shove, and it’s too late, and you’re stuck starting at a community college commuting from home. If you’re premed, that’s not a great option, since pre-reqs taken at a community college are not going to impress a med school admissions committee.

And yes, you probably might get in somewhere more selective than Stony Brook. Your record, while very nice, doesn’t look as if it would get you into a tippy-top school, prob not a a T20 school either. Maybe a T30-50 school. Maybe a 2nd tier LAC. All of those options are likely to cost you over 300K for an education, and then med school is another 400K. Very good idea to save on your undergrad by going to Stony Brook, and put the savings towards med school.

Go on a lovely day to take a campus tour of Stony Brook. They might change their minds. There are minimum 3.0 GPA, substance-free, 24 hr quiet time dorm communities there, too.

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Thank you. Is it a good school with nice prestige? Do they have a good biomed program?

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Isnt a 3.0 gpa like a 85%? Thats not high. I just feel like a failure if yk what i mean and ill have to give up something i loved. Seeing literally everyone else on this forum get praised and recommended good schools that aren’t sunys just ugh. I know im sounding dramatic but I really feel so lonely and defeated and afraid for my future. Id never forgive myself for the defeat of attenting a safety school

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Oh, and Buffalo is too close to University of Amherst, which this forum has completely shattered any thoughts I had of attending. Going to Buffalo and being in such close proximity to something that rejected me and I failed at would drive me more insane then I already am

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Amherst NY, NOT Amherst MA. Not even in close proximity. 379 miles between them.

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