May fail a class due to attendance - suddenly an issue. HELP!

Student Lounge College Life
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<p>I am sorry for asking for advice on what I can do to get back in my professor’s good graces. I told the Chair that Dr. B had to leave due to an emergency and couldn’t speak with me, I did not mention her cat. However, when I was speaking to the Chair and she asked me if I had spoke with Dr. B and I told her she had to leave, she put me on hold. That’s when I figured she approached Dr. B and asked her why she didn’t talk to me during office hours. A few minutes after I got off the phone with the chair is when I received the email from Dr. B, as explained previously. </p>

<p>I have the rest of the semester to set up an independent study advisor, but I did not know that at the time I wrote this post. I was told throughout the semester that it was too early to speak with professors about independent study because most would not know their course load and to wait until I registered for classes (or shortly before). I now see the error in blindly following advisor’s recommendations. However, I had never pursued an independent study course before, so I was just following what I was told. </p>

<p>As far as being able to graduate, no, that is not being dramatic. I am a transfer student. That means I have exactly 4 semesters to graduate. Spring (next) semester is my 4th semester. This course is required for my major, if I do not pass this course, I cannot do the internship, or take the Senior Seminar course in the Spring (both of which are required to graduate). So, no, I am really not being dramatic. I cannot retake it. Sorry if I did not clarify that. </p>

<p>As far as my dad being in the hospital. This was not an excuse. My dad is not recovering. My dad is dying. He has been in the ICU since Sept. I could have also mentioned the fact that my mother was diagnosed with lung cancer for the third time in 10 years and I have been taking her to and from treatments on my day off (Fridays). Or I could have mentioned the fact that I am single mother that lives in NC (where there is practically no public transportation). I also have documented (via my therapist, psychiatrist, and school) mental illnesses that are extremely debilitating, especially in a college environment. I did not mention any of those “excuses” in my original post. Being there for your parent is not an excuse, especially when he has no one else. I don’t understand how some of you were raised, however; my family comes before everything else. Would any of you disagree? </p>

<p>Thanks for those that understand my concerns. I was not becoming a thorn in her side, or whatever the phrase some used to refer to me. I only emailed her throughout the period where I was the only one that was able to support my dad. I met with her during office hours to discuss my attendance and offered documentation. I have consistently made great grades, never got behind on the reading, got notes from my fellow students, met with the Dean, etc. I followed the proper procedures.</p>

<p>My sister moved back down from Chicago when my mother was diagnosed with lung cancer and agreed to help me with our dad. So, I was able to return to classes and have not missed another lecture since. I see my dad after school and on weekends.</p>

<p>I take my education seriously. I had my daughter at the age of 19. I am 26 years old and graduating from a great university. I work as a tutor, am a mentor to other students through a program at my uni, etc. I take all of my responsibilities seriously.</p>

<p>If there is anyone that has ever been through something similar and can offer a word of advice, I would appreciate it. I haven’t contacted her since asking to speak with her during office hours, whenever she is available. However, previous students of hers have advised me that, in the event she does fail me, to appeal the decision to the Chair. Anyway, thanks everyone. Have a great weekend. </p>

<p>P.S. - A few typically insinuates an amount in of 1-3 absences. I missed, I believe, 2 days for my car breaking down. Considering my car broke down and I have no income, it was great that I only missed two days due to my car breaking down. Wouldn’t you say? I live 30 miles from campus, in a state that is known to have poor public transit. </p>

<p>I say 5-8 in total because, dependent on the class, I have missed 5 days in some classes and 8 in a different course. Sorry that I did not make it exceptionally clear in my first and second post.</p>

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<p>Why? I’ve never heard of a requirement like that. Is it a university requirement or is it because you run out of FA?</p>

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<p>@Nahara46: </p>

<p>I don’t think the other posters were really reprimanding the OP. As you said, she’s not a child. She is an adult, and they were treating her as an adult. They gave advice and perspective–perhaps not phrased in a very sympathetic manner, but the internet is not a great place to go to if you’re just looking for sympathy. They’re not scolding her for what she did wrong. They’re giving a different perspective on what the professor might have meant by her comments during their conversations (since the OP posted that she felt the professor had lead her astray), they’re explaining why they don’t think the professor isn’t persecuting the OP (which the OP felt like), and they’re commenting on what the OP could have done so that this situation doesn’t happen again.</p>

<p>@hallas: </p>

<p>While I might not agree with how everything was phrased, I do agree with the sentiment of most of the other posters. What’s done is done, but it is important to recognize that you have responsibilities. Sometimes, you have to make choices about what is more important to you, but in the end, you have to deal with the consequences of dropping the ball in one area of your life. If it says in the syllabus that attendance is mandatory, then it’s mandatory. The experiences that the OP had were unfortunate, but they weren’t always emergencies, nor were they extreme circumstances. I can recognize missing one day because of your car and then another because of your father, but after that, it was on you to make other arrangements so that you could either get to class or so that you could drop your class.</p>

<p>I hope your meeting with your professor went well. The only thing you can really do at this point is talk to your professor in person and specifically ask how your absences will affect your grades. She can fail you if it says so in the syllabus and if your absences are not excused. That sucks, but it’s life. Hopefully, you can arrange something with your professor so that’s not the case, but it never hurts to have a plan B in case something does happen.</p>

<p>Edit: Sorry, I posted at the same time as you and didn’t see your post.</p>

<p>Is there a reason that you can’t go over four semesters (financial, university policy, etc)? Would it be possible for you to withdraw for the semester and then finish your degree when you are in a better position to do so (health-wise, family-wise, transportation-wise, etc)? Also, you mentioned having mental illnesses–do you have someone in your school’s disabilities office that could help you? Even while this is not specifically related to your disability, they may have counselors or other advisers who are used to working with professors to get their students what they need. Perhaps, they could give you better advice on how to navigate this situation.</p>

<p>Perhaps, if you explain that to the professor that you need this course to graduate, she may be more willing to let you do some sort of assignment to make up the absences. Explain that it was your understanding that the absences could be excused because they were family emergencies, and that you had tried your very best to keep in contact with your professor and participate actively and thoughtfully in class. See where you stand with your professor before you go up the chain, and try to follow up with an email (regardless of what she says) so that you have everything in writing.</p>

<p>Hope it works out for you =D</p>

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<p>Actually, baxtrax, none of the comments were suggestions in any way. All of the comments were condescending, telling me this isn’t high school any more, etc. I am fine with people being harsh, though. That doesn’t bother me. I try and address their comments and then move on, however; I felt that maybe I should explain that my father isn’t recovering and should not be left alone. No one should be left alone in a cold, sterile environment to pass away. It is extremely tough for me to even type about this, so I am not going to anymore. </p>

<p>Like I said in my post a few minutes ago - if anyone has been in a similar situation, please let me know. Feel free to message me on here or just post. I will be checking back in frequently.</p>

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Some of us were raised to be responsible for our actions. Your dad is dying, okay, can you do anything about it? Nope. It’d be great if we could all do whatever we wanted but that’s not how life works. Sometimes we have to make choices. Option A) I sit in the hospital and talk to my dad, feeling good. Option B) I goto school and graduate, improving my life. You picked A. You have to be accountable with the repercussions, namely school.</p>

<p>For the record my car got stolen 2 weeks ago. Today it took me 1 hr to walk home. This wednesday I walked 2 hrs from one campus to another.</p>

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<p>Hallas- You really need to work on keeping post length down. It’s hard to slog through that many words.</p>

<p>I live in an area with basically no public transit, and I don’t have a car. I also live about 15 miles from school. Where there’s a will, there’s a way. </p>

<p>When you sign up for a class, the syllabus is the contract between you and the professor. If there is a stated max number of days missed, stated attendance points etc, those are rules that must be abided by. As others have said, professors are human and are certainly willing to make exceptions for extenuating circumstances. But, it seems like you’re looking for some preferential treatment here or something like that. </p>

<p>It also seems like you acted rather impatiently with said professor regarding honors sponsorship or whatever, after said professor has been VERY patient with you and been seemingly quite willing to work with you on your missed days. That’s not exactly very endearing.</p>

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<p>@bomerr: I live 30 miles away from school and have a 6 year old to pick up from after school care at school by 5pm. I cannot afford extended after school care. If I were to walk, my daughter would be stranded at school Monday-Thursday. Are you being serious right now?</p>

<p>I took responsibility. I told all of my professors that I realized that I could expect a significant drop in grades, but that I would do whatever they requested or required of me to demonstrate that I wanted to be there. And yeah, you are right, I did choose to be with my father when no one else could be. I accepted that. </p>

<p>@comfortablycurt, I am glad that you only live 15 miles away. That is half of the miles I commute to school. Chapel Hill is incredibly congested (and I live in Raleigh, for those of you familiar with the NC area), so it takes me about an hour, on average, to get to and from school. I did not act impatiently in regards to Dr. B not being able to advise me. I asked her after class on Tuesday if she could, she said she couldn’t talk to me about it, I contacted the Chair for recommendations on who I speak with. She redirected me to a different advisor and I got it taken care of. </p>

<p>I did not ask for preferential treatment. The most I have done is meet with her, emailed her, turned in assignments on time, attended class on a regular basis (aside from when I was being there for my father), offered documentation for the absences, etc. I don’t really know how I am seeking preferential treatment. </p>

<p>Thanks for the comments, though?</p>

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<p>Those were all suggestions, and at this point, the only really suggestion is to talk to your professor (which you said you were going to do). So it makes sense that a lot of the other comments were explaining your situation from a different perspective, and perhaps, what you could have been down if this situation again.</p>

<p>The rest of the comments (when you through out some of the snide remarks, which I agree may be grating and a little too blunt, especially in your situation) can pretty much be boiled down to: (1) Making excuses doesn’t help, (2) your professor is not out to get you, and (3) sometimes you have to make choices and deal with the consequences. Those are all valid comments and pieces of general life advice, even if they may seem harsh.</p>

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<p>romanigypsyeyes - I am not sure if it is UNC school systems policy, or what. I attend UNC CH and they only allow transfer students 4 semesters to graduate. It is actually deemed the 8 semester policy, but they take the transfer credits into account. Thus, if you transfer in as a junior (per your credit hours), you have 4 semesters left. Does that make sense?</p>

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<p>What are you asking for again? </p>

<p>Advice? What?</p>

<p>I mean if you say you’ve done everything you could then…</p>

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<p>I had already done what was suggested, though. Which you stated. </p>

<p>As far as Dr. B being out to get me, she is a tough and biased professor. Professors in the Women’s and Gender Studies department can, at times, be difficult to deal with. They are human, just as I am. I honestly feel as if she took offense to me calling the Chair and relating what I had been told. Dr. B is a great teacher and knows her stuff, but she is a bit touchy at times. I have relaxed a lot more since speaking with my therapist and an advisor. </p>

<p>I emailed Dr. B (she was out of town after Tuesday, set up a professor to come speak with us on Thursday - who never showed up) and am waiting on a response as to when I should come speak with her about my grade. So, I have already done that, as well. Which I think I stated in a previous post? :stuck_out_tongue: </p>

<p>I guess the human part of me still feels that no one who has a parent that they love and are close to, would choose a lecture over being there for them and with them. Dr. B has had substitute lecturers twice and cancelled class once, both due to personal emergencies. So, obviously she (as well as most people) feels the same as I do. </p>

<p>Hopefully, someone will come along who has had attendance issues due to family emergencies and can lend me some advice as to how they handled it and what they pursued. Perhaps my situation is really unique given my school’s policy on the strict graduation schedule, my location, being of senior standing, etc. I don’t know what I am looking for anymore. I guess no one will know what they will do in the event something like this happens. I figured that on such a popular forum, there would be a few people this would resonate with and thus offer clear suggestions. I guess I have done everything I can, though. Thank you!</p>

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<p>What is the 4-semester policy you’re referring to? It makes a difference. I’ve never heard of one so I’m really curious.</p>

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<p>Hey, I answered your question, earlier, but it was probably easy to miss. When you transfer into UNC CH (as a junior, in my case, 6 if you are a sophomore), you have 4 semesters, no exceptions, to graduate. If you do not graduate after 4 semesters, you’re SOL.</p>

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<p><a href=“http://www.unc.edu/ugradbulletin/aca_aff.html[/url]”>http://www.unc.edu/ugradbulletin/aca_aff.html&lt;/a&gt;&lt;/p&gt;

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<p>There seems to be not much to do except wait for Dr. B to respon to your email. There’s nothing we can do. It’s reliant on Dr. B and your conversation with her. If she is adamant on failing you, provide her with evidence that due to your circumstances you felt you could do the best you could do. If she still does not believe you have earned a passing grade, then take it up higher. </p>

<p>Until then…there’s nothing you can do. In the meantime, enjoy life.</p>

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<p>You’re right, I’m sorry I missed it.</p>

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<p>Yep! That is correct, oldmom. However, for transfers, the rule is extremely strict. Freshman get 8 semesters (they don’t transfer in, of course). Sophomores get 6 and Juniors get 4. No exceptions are made for transfers. </p>

<p>It is based on the credit hours you have when you transferred in. Unfortunately, summer school does not help me as only one Women’s Studies course is offered in the summer (aside from 101) and it is not the one I need to graduate. Women’s Studies is just not a big department and has very few students. I have already taken the course offered for Women’s Studies during the summer, last summer.</p>

<p>Thanks Niquii. And yeah, sorry romani, it is definitely easy to miss.</p>

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<p>Could you graduate as a political science major?</p>

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<p>Unfortunately, if I fail this class, I will not graduate with either major - although I only need 2 more political science courses to graduate. As it is right now, I have to take 19 credit hours next semester (which with my internship and ind. study, is fine, and I have done a large course load like that in the past, so I don’t mind).</p>

<p>They only allow a max of 20 hours in one semester (and that is with Dean approval). If I fail this course, I will need to take 22 credit hours next semester to graduate - since you need 120 hours for the degree. So, it’s not an option.</p>

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I’m saying life isn’t fair. My car got stolen so now I walk to school. If I was playing your game I could just say “ooh well, I have no car, therefore I deserve to stay home and still pass the class because it wasn’t my fault.” But that’s not how life works. So your dad was in the hospital. You had a choice to make. You choose to stay with him instead of going to school. Now you are complaining about failing a class. Do you see the problem here? You already choose being with your dad over school.</p>