<p>There is also the Maine Maritime Academy, which trains people for the merchant marine.</p>
<p>I would suggest reading some first-hand accounts of service in the ground forces in recent conflicts, such as Nathaniel Fick’s One Bullet Away and Anthony Swofford’s Jarhead. Maybe your son would read them too. It might give him a more realistic view than a recruiter’s glossy brochure.</p>
<p>The thing about joining the military is that you go to war when they send you, whether you think it is a justified war or not. Someone mentioned WWII. BIIIIIG difference between that and the invasion of Iraq…or Grenada, for that matter. Sure, you may wish to serve your country, but what about when you are ordered to do something that you believe is actually against your country’s interests? I was talking to a guy who is a retired Green Beret during the last few days. He made it clear that there were things he had participated in that he was proud of, and things he was pretty much ashamed of, and that most Americans are largely unaware of the latter. It’s a serious commitment, and not to be undertaken just because you are 18 and want to get out of Dodge or are brimming with the romance of movies and pumped full of testosterone.</p>
<p>^^ Being 18 and getting out of Dodge is the #1 reason many in my area enlist. I’m guessing it’s also why the service has many more enlistees from rural and/or inner-city areas. I understand all the positive posts above. However, at least in our case, the OP’s title held true. Recruiters are often aggressive, and overly so. I found that to be the case both with S1 and S2. S1 had good college offers and scholarships–he never considered the service, and still, they kept hounding and hounding us.</p>
<p>Yes, schools must have an opt-out policy, but ours certainly kept it hidden and didn’t even tell parents. I found out about it on cc!</p>
<p>S2 decided to join the Natl Guard. I felt then (2 years ago) that this was one of the riskiest, as they are trained as weekend warriors and were being sent to Iraq/Afgan with less training than the full-time enlistees. The recruiter was pushy, definitely tried to keep me completely out of the loop, drove him to our testing center and kept him in a hotel that night, drove him to the physical testing. He was amazed at some of the kids getting passed, kids who were standing there telling the dr. they had severe concussions from hs football and hadn’t been released to play the sport yet, etc.</p>
<p>He had done the testing, and at the very end, after an exhausting day, he read every last word of the contract. Twice. I had made him promise he would do that. Yes, the job was much different than that promised by the recruiter, and the bonus was 1/2. He walked away and didn’t sign, then had to ride home the 2.5hours with the recruiter. She was NOT happy. Maybe she shouldn’t have lied…I think it must have taken a lot of fortitude for what he did under that pressure and I was proud of that.</p>
<p>So…the military is a very valid choice for some, but I’d highly recommend every student and parents go in with eyes wide open.</p>
<p>Worst stories for me (and I was a psychiatrist for the Air Force) are recruiters telling recruit telling kids to stop taking their antipsychotics before boot camp. Pretty sure that doesn’t often apply to families here, and maybe it’s rare overall, but in my military suburb, at least once a month I have a kid wanting off meds so they can join the military. Every time I ask for something in writing from the recruiter, and not only do I not get that , but don’t even get return calls.</p>
<p>I have two kids like that right now. Not kids; they are 18 and 19.</p>
<p>^^ Shrinkrap, I thought that psychological problems like that would be a problem for kids wanting to sign up, and that they’d ultimately be rejected (based on the type/severity of the problem)? I would think it’d be quite a risk to recruit someone with a psychological problem and have them trained while off their meds (in a presumably less stable state) than more stably on the medication. </p>
<p>We had a discussion in one of my classes about a mall that had a huge skating park and arcade in it, funded/run by the army or marines (forget which). The arcade was all war games, and then there was a recruitment office next door. I think it’s terrible to try to interest young people with “games” and false promises and tales of glory. </p>
<p>However, for some people it may work out. My cousin was in the National Guard Reserves for a few years, had his college paid for (Penn State, he got a degree in education), and was told once he would be deployed to Iraq - but never was. Actually, I think he was really just paid a large amount (including tuition) to train one weekend a month, and never actually “served” in any way. Of course, this was just before the war, so going into the military at this time is much riskier.</p>
<p>Recruiters tell the kids to get me to write a letter saying they are “cleared”. They don’t know I actually had that role while I was active duty. Feel bad for the ones that MIGHT be okay, but I worry that they’ll be scared to say when they need help. Not always going to be an option. I’ve hear these days mental health morbidity is more common than other kinds. Most memorable kid decompensated during boot camp ( during Desert Storm) and that’s how I heard what sometimes went on.</p>
<p>xdkrx626 - I don’t think serving is a bad thing, but I do think the games (some) recruiters play are truly disgusting. The false promises, changing the contract terms after it has been signed, the things that are taught/experienced…some people have decent experiences and a lot of success. Some people are psychologically and/or physically damaged for life. And many of these people signed up at an age where they did not truly grasp the significance of what they were doing. You don’t have that kind of risk entering the work force or college after high school. This is why parents (being parents - who care/worry about their children in selfish ways [and I do mean this in a positive light, you should be selfish about the care of your child]) want to steer their children away from it.</p>
<p>This is unhelpful. Even if you have a family history of military service, no parent can be blamed for being concerned about the safety of a child in the military. It’s a very real danger and a very real sacrifice. Regardless of one’s feelings about the justness of this war or that, there it nothing disgusting about being worried for a beloved child’s life and limb, even if he chose freely to enter the service with his eyes wide open and with understanding of the dangers and risks.</p>
<p>Parents put in an incredible amount of time, money and sweat in
raising kids and they’re typically pretty attached to them. Any
reasonable person should be able to understand why parents do not
want their kids taking undue risks with their lives.</p>
<p>I had a friend that was fairly well spoiled by his parents and
lived at home until he got married in his late twenties. I asked
him why they treated him so well and he told me that his older
brother was killed in a war and that they didn’t want to lose
their only remaining child.</p>
<p>“I would want my kids to be in the optimal situation where they can prosper, contribute and thrive.”</p>
<p>Yea - we all do. That’s why somebody has to step up and serve in the military."</p>
<p>Well, I think me and my family have “stepped up and served in the military,” as you say. Seeing as both me and my husband served in a war zone, earning our air medals and having to leave our newborn baby with a babysitter for most of two years. As my sister and father served, as did my husband’s father, two brothers and sister. So I think I’m pretty qualified to make the statement, “I would want my kids to be in the optimal situation where they can prosper, contribute and thrive.”</p>
<p>What that means, if I need to explain it to you, is that if S1 wanted to go into the military…since he is an INTJ personality, fairly thin brainiac, I would want him to be an officer corp computer specialist in the Air Force, cracking code, problem solving and hacking the enemies computers. Not enlisting in the Marines or the Army, getting deployed to the desert. That could be the optimal situation for some kids, not for mine. Doesn’t really require any higher level thinking to figure that out, you just need to know your kids.</p>
<p>I’m a supporter of the military. I have seen military service transform the lives of some young men and women, and I think the desire to serve one’s country is very admirable. What I’m against is allowing military recruitment in high schools WITHOUT informing the parents in advance that their children’s information is being given to recruiters and that they will have to opt out to prevent it. As long as my children are in high school and home with me, I should be able to decide whether military recruiters can get access to their information and contact them at school – and I shouldn’t have to find out about this on CC and go to the school to sign an opt-out form. After they turn 18 and graduate, then they will have the right to decide whether they want to walk into a recruitment office and sign up.</p>
<p>I’m probably not the only parent who plans to go to a high school today to keep his/her child’s contact information private.</p>
<p>It would be pretty to think so, to quote Hemingway. I can’t discuss this without veering into politics, but the matter is more complicated than such platitudes suggest.</p>
<p>You do realize that all men who are US citizens are required to register for the selective service within 30 days of their 18th birthday? </p>
<p>You do realize that recruiters are simply salesmen? They aren’t going to conscript your underage child.</p>
<p>You do realize that all you and/or your child has to do when called or spoken to by a recruiter is say, " I’m not interested, thank you." </p>
<p>You do realize that access to high schools by military recruiters is a part of the No Child Left Behind Act of 2002? It isn’t a new phenomenom. </p>
<p>I truly don’t understand the worry here. As with anything else in our child’s lives, hopefully we’ve given our kids a strong sense of self, the ability make reasoned decisions, and the willingness to calmly discuss options for the future with us.</p>
<p>(H is a physician, career military officer, served a tour in Iraq. One brother in law, also a physician, served for four years, another brother in law was enlisted for seven years, went to college, then served as an officer for another four years with one tour in Iraq. Brother served during Vietnam. Father in law, and uncle, both physicians, both served for a few years during Vietnam. Father, physician, and three uncles served during World War II…)</p>
<p>Phenomenon. Geessh. Why does auto correct change what I don’t want changed, and not correct the actual spelling mistakes sometimes? Mysteries of the universe.</p>
<p>SOMEBODY has to serve. The idea that YOUR kid is somehow more precious than other people’s kids, and therefore should get a pass, is an insult to everybody who has served and their parents.</p>
<p>After hearing my DS on a telephone call for almost 15 minutes (truly a marathon for him), I asked hom who he was talking to. When I found out it was a National Guard recruiter, I did flip a little. I did fill out the waiver for no contact, but when one of his friends signed up for NG, one of their tasks is to give him the names and numbers of 10 of his friends. I come from a long line of servicemen, and I am proud of their service, but I don’t want my 17yo to be recruited. He won’t be 18 until he is in college, and he has plenty of time to think about serving after he has his BA. </p>
<p>What really galled me was that the recruiter kept trying to get me to change my mind, or at least talk to me about the Guard once I had already told him that he was in violation. Many recruiters are very aggressive, which I think is stange in this time of troop withdrawal and proposed budget cuts.</p>
<p>The fact of the matter is that service is voluntary – not mandatory, therefore it is a choice. Therefore, the choice should be discussed as all major choices in a person’s life should be. Mom and Dad should talk to the recruiter with their son and get all the pertinent information and then talk to their son about the ROTC or enlistment. In the end, it should be the son’s choice, but after careful consideration and discussion by all.</p>
<p>Some people do enlist because they genuinely want to serve your country. Then you have kids who want to enlist out of desperation to make a money or go to college, because they can’t afford it otherwise or have no job waiting for them upon graduation. That, to me, is not admirable. And it is this second group of kids that fall hardest for the false promises and pressures of being recruited, only to find out it wasn’t really what they wanted to do - they just needed a job or money or something in their life to provide them a future. There is a difference to me between those who understand what a commitment they are making, want to service, are proud of the service, and all the rest of the “perks” are just extra, and then those who have no idea what they are doing and just want the money or to travel but don’t really have that patriotic sense to serve. Maybe they develop it after a few months of enrollment, but I think it is a parent’s duty to understand why their child wants to enlist and ensure that their child knows it is a lifestyle choice and not just a job, along with the risks and other stuff recruiters won’t tell you.</p>
<p>Our school district sends home the “opt-out” form each summer, in the stack of paperwork and policies they send before every school year. Beyond that, we should have taught our kids to ask questions and trust them to do so. They should have been learning history, civics and consumer economics all along. Military recruiters are going to make sales pitches, just like those pushing cars, credit cards, time shares, colleges, etc. There are advantages to military service, but a huge amount of research needed to find the right path. </p>
<p>The poster’s kid who actually read the contract and decided not to sign made the perfect response, and it was made by the right person. Maybe his recruiter learned a lesson, too.</p>