My mom is watching me too closely on Facebook

<p>When I left for college, my mom began using her FB account more and more to watch everything I'm doing. Since I've been here, she comments on EVERY status I post, sends me a message after every status I post that she doesn't like saying "you're being awfully negative" or "that was rather judgemental, take that down immediately" etc. and when I gave someone my number over a comment, she called me up like 4 minutes later and made me take it down.</p>

<p>So I started hiding my status updates from her; but she still called me and somehow knew what my status updates are. Just today she messaged me about a status she didn't like that I HID from her, and when I asked how she knew about it she said she has "spys." </p>

<p>This is a problem and I don't know how to handle it. Advice?</p>

<p>Maybe you should unfriend her. Just tell her calmly that it doesn’t mean you’re cutting her out of your life, and that you two will stay in touch. But make it clear that you need your own space.</p>

<p>Unfriend her. Easy.</p>

<p>Well it seems like that unfriending her would not do the trick, seeing as she apparently has someone else’s facebook that she can use to look at your status updates/etc. Do you have any of her friends as your own friends? Hide posts from them or any siblings or neighbors that you think might be doing it.</p>

<p>Of course, you could always just get to the root of the problem and explain to her why you feel uncomfortable. I probably wouldn’t myself at this stage, and I can understand why you wouldn’t want to, but if it doesn’t get better then that may be the best option.</p>

<p>Just delete the thing.</p>

<p>You can probably figure out who her spies are by checking out who your mutual friends are (friends of both yours and hers). Remove/block them and your mom, and you’ll probably be set.</p>

<p>Tell her that you prefer to keep your social life and personal life separate, and that it bears no meaning on your respect and love for her.</p>

<p>-Tell her to not get so involved in your life
-Delete her
-Ignore her
-Delete Facebook. It’s an invasion of privacy anyway :p</p>

<p>Side note: Ya, 10 posts!!</p>

<p>My mom gets MY status updates on her cell phone…She doesn’t bug me about it now…but wait till I move out lol</p>

<p>You can make a new facebook, too. Start adding people to that one and stop using/delete the old one. You can also make it totally private and invisible to everyone not on your friend’s list, so that they can even click on your profile, send you a message, or add you. Worst thing there is you don’t have 100 friends on your list who you never talk to anyway. </p>

<p>Or talk to her about it. I wouldn’t say what’s she’s doing is totally inappropriate (after all, you added her and put that stuff there for your friend’s to read), but it’s definitely… weird, I guess is the best word. You don’t need to be lectured over facebook, and if that’s what she’s going to do, tell her you’re just going to remove her and all mutual friends. Just remove that outlet from her.</p>

<p>Find your mom’s yearbook or the next time you go to a wedding or other similar event, make sure she gets hammered. Proceed to upload and tag her in these embarrassing pictures. That should solve the problem.</p>

<p>Cases like this make me glad that my parents are technologically incompetent.</p>

<ol>
<li>Tell her she’s bugging you</li>
<li>Defriend her</li>
<li>Stop updating everything you do on Facebook, leave her in the dark a bit</li>
</ol>

<p>I’d say everythinkg everyone else said is right, but if you delete her she will still find out what you post. And you can’t be rude to your mom and just remove her from your friend list. I get mad when people do that to me and if you did it to your mom she whould be really mad, then she would want to know even more, thats the way it works. What you have to do is just make good comments and not have anything bad on your wall. Its kind of good that she is your friend cause its an extra friend in your list anyway. I would open a new account under a diferent name where you talk about stuff you dont want her to know about. I like the idea of getting embarasing pics and posting them. Thats funny. Maybe you could even tell her that its not cool for parents to write stuff on your wall even if she is your friend. She should understand. Its not like you want her moving into your dorm with you. It’s kind of the same thing. Tell her she can peek, but not post.</p>

<p>why are you friends with your mother on facebook in the first place? I mean most people put up drinking pics/ pics with things you wouldn’t want ur parents to see (drugs etc.). IDK I think a parent should know the boundary between being normal and weird and commenting on every fb status is pretty weird. I have one friend who’s mother comments on her daughter’s facebook statuses a lot and its just weird. defriend your mom. Talk to her on the phone</p>

<p>^
If you don’t want pics to be seen by your mother, don’t put them on facebook. Or anywhere online for that matter. If you don’t want them to be seen by your mother, you sure as hell don’t want them seen by your bosses, etc.</p>

<p>It’s stupid to put things like that up there anyway. </p>

<p>And @OP- I kind of agree with some other people on here. If your mom isn’t going to be mature about facebook then you need to kindly tell her that you are going to remove her and whoever else is spying for her. If she agrees not to contact you about them anymore, then leave her.</p>

<p>She made me add her. I didn’t want to but she said that if I was going to go somewhere far away that a condition of that would be adding her. And even if I delete her, her spies can still report back. And I have NO clue who they are.</p>

<p>“Cases like this make me glad that my parents are technologically incompetent”</p>

<p>I second that</p>

<p>Just ask her to message you with her comments instead of posting them. Ask her to do that so your friends don’t tease you about having a helicopter mom.</p>

<p>Then give some kind of response to her messages so she doesn’t think she has to post to get your attention.</p>

<p>create a second account, maybe just your first name and last initial, or a pseudo name. only update your mom account every once in a while. de-friend anyone who knows your mom. or, delete the account and create a new one, but with an email your mom doesn’t have and a different name. best option would be not to post anything inappropriate on FB. deleting would be the best option, or create a “family” account and a “friends” account. I know people that have made a special account for families.</p>

<p>I agree with above posts, and have two additions:

  • Comment on her every single status/picture/friends. Don’t leave smart comments, but stupid, nooby comments. (very creepy)
  • Whenever she comments on your crap, just delete her comment immediately. Do it every time, she then, hopefully will understand.</p>