My parents simply can't afford my college education (was Crisis)

<p>My parents simply can't afford my college education. They tried to put me up at Binghamton, even though I continued to tell them it would be best for me to go to community college for at least one year, but more than likely two years, where I could work and for the most part put myself through school, then transfer to a state school (I'm from New Jersey) for my last two years. They continued to tell me it was rediculous, but I knew they wouldn't be able to afford school for me. They were shot down for financial aid loans, and I had to take them on in my name, only instead of having everything covered, only $9,000 of $24,000 was covered, my parents are obviously not going to be able to get this kind of money loaned to them. Even if I leave after this semester I will still owe about $6,000 on my account for the semester, which even that may be dificult to get (I need this to at least get my transcript if I'm going to go to community college by me). I am really lost right now and I need as much advice as I can get. I can't talk to my parents because my dad is overly optimistic and doesn't see how the real world works, and my mother live in a world of ignorance is bliss. I love my parents like you wouldn't believe and I know that they were only trying to help me, even if it wasn't what was best for anyone. Can anyone please help me with this situation?</p>

<p>I feel like you may be leaving out al ot that would help people to provide a lot of better advice. I read your back posts, to get some context to see if I could help, but it seems you had a lot of personal reasons for choosing where you went (it doesn't sound like your parents are the only ones who are accountable for the situation at this point), but also you have had many non-financial reasons you've wanted to transfer (e.g. you have orthodontic treatment that is far away, you hate the weather there, the school spirit is missing, etc.). Moreover, you mention your dad has cancer. That is a big complexity- emotionally and financially! Anyway my main point is I feel a lot of important information is missing. </p>

<p>I guess my question for you is if your alternative plan is realistic. Can you really go to school full time at the cc, enough to pay your way, and maintain the grades you need to transfer to state (and have a semblance of a college life, which is something you value)? Would it make more sense for you to maintain a loan for cc tuition?</p>

<p>alright, those plans of transferring were more fanciful than anything (although rutgers was a serious option because of tuition and traveling costs, lafayette and william & mary were more just me wanting closurei guess because they were my dream schools and I was waitlisted at both), when it came down to it there were obviously other reasons i was considered transferring from the beginning, but it really hit me this week when I tried to register for classes and could not because of a hold on my account. that was on top of other money issues that came up during the past couple of weeks that brought me to this. i was told by the student accounts office that i couldn't register until everything was paid in full and unfortunately i dont know how thats going to happen. my parents believed that everything was covered by financial aid, but even speaking to them they said if they knew that we were going to have to find $15,000/year they would have recommended for me to go to community school for the first couple of years.
do you know any places i could go for this $15,000/year plus whatever it might increase to per year? i hate to sound negative but if the government rejects my parents for loans, i doubt any bank in its right mind, or any bank that gives somewhat sensible loans will approve them, and I don't see myself getting approved because I don't have a job (I'd be willing to get one but up here its definitely more difficult than it would be at community college or rutgers)</p>

<p>also let me know what other information you need, i'd be more than willing to provide it</p>

<p>If your from new jersey why not go to Rutgers wont you get cheaper in state tuition?</p>

<p>not terribly cheaper something like $2,000? i might wind up saving even a bit more than that if i went there because i would live off campus with two friends from home who are moving off campus with friends from school next year (ive met these friends and i get along with them too), but would it not be better to save the money at community school? (i plan on going to grad school for either a JD/MBA or to get certified as a CPA or get a teaching master)</p>

<p>I'm sorry I didn't answer the question at the end of star bright's post. I would plan on working as a night custodian part time in the school district that my father works at (he's the union rep for custodians in the district, so I'd have priority at any openings, which there are likely to at the start of the new year), I'd work 19.5 hours/week @ $8/hr which is pretty solid. my community college costs will run a little under $2,000/semester. If a semester is 4 months and I work for those 4 months I will make within $100 of what i need to cover college costs (assuming i receive 75% of that pay after taxes) I would be pleased with that financially, i would have to work something out with my parents for paying off the $12,500 for the first semester at binghamton (in a perfect world they would pay it off because i had tried to prevent it from ever happening, but in that's not realistic). I do value the traditional college experience (football, going out on weekends), but I just don't believe its economically feasible, and I know it might be a strange decision, but I think I'd be willing to give up the typical college experience in order to work toward financial stability later on in my life (since I never had it growing up). My ideal situation would be to book early classes and thenspend my time in between school and work at the library since with the exception of two of my high school friends, everyone else will be away at school. I really became a workaholic after high school because of the economic conditions I grew up with, I learned that hard work is the only way to live a better life than my parents. I'm frustrated because this is an embarassing situation, and I know it could have been avoided. It also seems wasteful to me to pay the $12,500 for one semester at Binghamton, but I seem to get depressed every time some problem with money comes up and this could (and has at least recently) effect my school work</p>

<p>Do you need to have the transcripts sent from Binghamton to go to the community college? I mean, I know they expect transcripts, but if you explain why you can't have them sent officially and you can live with not being able to transfer the credits you've already earned --at least for a little while until you get the balance paid off-- is it possible to go ahead and just get started with the community college classes anyway?</p>

<p>I mean, I don't know if it is. I'm just wondering if you've inquired about the possibility.</p>

<p>JB, the title of your post caught my attention. It seems you are in a difficult situation. Why don't you try to go the financial aid office and ask for some advice. Maybe they can give you some ideas about how to solve your debt with the school.
If I were you I would to go cc, get the best grades you can, and then transfer to a state college. Getting in debt for an undergrad degree is bad idea.</p>

<p>My mother is coming up to speak to the financial aid office with me in about a week, when she comes to pick me up on Tuesday for Thanksgiving (the financial aid office closes on Wednesday). I also have a question about State Universities etc., would a school like Ramapo be looked at as being on an equal level with Rutgers-NB? Ramapo is close enough where I could commute to school, also since I grew up in the area it would be alot easier for me to find a job while going to school, but Rutgers provides more of the college experience that I desire and there are also many opportunities at the different shops and eateries around town. I would have a car at both places so either is feasable.</p>

<p>something I forgot to add, they would cost about the same if I live there, but I would save about $5,000 by commuting to Ramapo</p>

<p>John, my very own personal opinion about undergrad degree is that the brand name of the school does not really make a difference in the long term. Your grades, your effort to learn and challenge yourself instead of just getting a grade, paid work, and EC activities are what makes you a successful student. For graduate school brand name/recognition of the university is important. For undergrad, going to a decent state or public college is good enough. At this point, at least on my point of view, getting a undergrad education without incurring in massive amount of debt is more important than brand recognition of the school. You have two choices that cost about the same, so your final decision will depend on which college you like the most. good luck!</p>

<p>Thank you all for the help.
To the last person who posted: Binghamton for instance is only around 2,000 more for me than Rutgers or Ramapo, the problem is still finding the money to provide for my family's expected contribution, so would you recommend going to community college for the year and a half before i transfer out? Also part of why it is so difficult for my family to meet the expected contribution is because the FAFSA doesn't take into account the amount of debt a family has incurred, while the CSS profile does. Is there anyway I could show my profile for this to the school that I am looking at since they don't accept it in order to help our my situation? Also would it possibly make more sense for me to apply to schools that see the css since they will be able to see such figures?</p>

<p>Even schools that use the CSS Profile don't necessarily make adjustments for family debt. It's really up to the schools themselves. Just because the Profile might ask about debt, doesn't mean Profile schools will factor that information into their aid awards. And certain kinds of debt are more likely to be considered than others; medical debt, for instance, might be something they're more willing to work with than consumer debt.</p>

<p>All you can do is to explain your situation to financial aid and see if they can offer and advice or assistance.</p>

<p>I hope this all works out for you. I agree with Momofateen. Keeping you debt load down for your undergrad is really critical, especially with grad school in the future as an objective for you.</p>

<p>Most of the debt was amassed while my father was working a job for around three years hwere he wasn't paid by his boss on a regular basis after he had lost his job prior to that one. My parents used credit cards to pay the mortgage and for food (not the best decisions I know, but its what they had to do).</p>

<p>John, you're in a difficult situation. I'm in CA so i'm not really framiliar wit the colleges that you mentioned. I would say keep your options open. Talk to the financial advisors for all the schools and once you have a proposal from them make a decision. Again, I need to repeat that an undegrad education is not about the brand name. The education you get comes from the effort you put into it. For example my D wants to attend a school that is private and expensive. Even though we could afford it, we are not going to pay for it because there is a decent state college that she can attend. With this economy flirting with a recession, we don't feel spending a lot of money on an undegrad education is a wise choice. Again, it's just my opinion. I also think that if you incurr in a lot of debt to get your undergrad then your job opportunities will be limited because you'll be making all your decision on money. You may have to take a job with limited career oportunities and a good salary over a job with great career potential but lower salary. As for now, I know is really hard for you, but my advice to you is to limit the amount of debt. Community college is a good option. You should work hard and get good/excellent grades so you can transfer easily later on when you are ready. Hope this helps.
I should add that if my D doesn't get into the state college, which is really competitive. We're not paying for a private college. My D will go to community college and then transfer to a UC system such as Berkely, Davis, Irving etc...</p>

<p>With my two classes on tuesday being cancelled I've decided that it is best for me to go home monday to have a little bit of an extended break for thanksgiving to discuss the matters with my family. I will be speaking with my financial aid officers on Monday now so I will keep you all posted on the outcomes. Once again thank you all so much for your help!</p>

<p>So i spoke with the people in financial aid and I was told that my parents misunderstood them and that the rest of the funds would have to come from alternative loans. On top of that i was told that if my balance was not paid by Monday (December 1st) my classes for the first semester would be cancelled? I was later told by someone in student accounts that this was not true but I'm extremely confused about this. I am also having difficulty finding a cosigner for my loans because I know my parents do not have high enough credit ratings to be approved, but aunts and uncles, etc. all seem hesitant to sign on probably because my parents erratic financial history and my father's current condition are in the backs of their minds. Can anybody help me?</p>

<p>John,</p>

<p>
[quote]
I knew they wouldn't be able to afford school for me. They were shot down for financial aid loans, and I had to take them on in my name, only instead of having everything covered, only $9,000 of $24,000 was covered, my parents are obviously not going to be able to get this kind of money loaned to them.

[/quote]
</p>

<p>I am sorry for your situation but I am having a problem understanding this statement, because it seems that you knew before you even went to Binghamton, that your parents did not have to $$ to pay the bill (at minimum, you knew last spring when you received your FA package whether or not this was going to be a financially feasible option for your family). According to Binghamton</p>

<p>
[quote]
During the term, the student will be sent a monthly statement if they have a balance. Each monthly billing statement (prepared on or about the 1st of the month) will list a due date (on or about the 20th of each month), similar to a credit card bill.

[/quote]
</p>

<p>Where did you think the $$ was going to magically appear from? Each month, you had the opportunity to talk with your parents and work out something with the school. The hard thing for them is you waiting until your back was literally on the wall before asking for help.</p>

<p>I think at this stage of the game, I think your plan should be working out something with the school so you can stay in class and get your credits (even if they are on hold), so you don't end up owing the $$ and having nothing to show for it. However, the school can and probably have placed a hold on your account to prevent you from registering next term. As others have stated, unless you can get transcripts from Bing, it will be hard for you to transfer credits to whatever new college you decide to attend.</p>

<p>
[quote]
HOLDS: Students who have outstanding debts with the University will not be permitted to register for courses or obtain transcripts until the outstanding debts are satisfied. In addition, debts owed to the University that are not paid by the end of the term will be forwarded to a collection agency or the NYS Attorney General's office for collection. These debts are subject to collection cost, penalties and interest, and the debt is reported to the major credit bureaus. Once a student's account is sent to a collection agency or the NYS Attorney General's Office for collection the student is made ineligible to attend the University until the debts are satisfied. </p>

<p>[url=<a href="http://studentaccounts.binghamton.edu/paypro.htm%5Dpaypro%5B/url"&gt;http://studentaccounts.binghamton.edu/paypro.htm]paypro[/url&lt;/a&gt;]

[/quote]
</p>

<p>I think the sad reality is that you are not going to be attending school anywhere next term as you will not be able to return to Binghamton and you will not be able to transfer someplace else until you get your account cleaned up. It sounds as if you may have to place school on the back burner for a minute because you need to see the FA people to work out a payment plan to pay off your outstanding debt (you do not want to wreck your credit rating because you may need credit in the future). Finding a job, maybe even 2 jobs to pay off your outstanding debt might be a good option at this time, so that you can get into school for summer session.</p>

<p>John, I agree that you should ask to complete your semester if the college will allow it, conceding that you can't go forward without another forumula for costs entirely..something else has to be your plan for future semesters. Your parent's credit problems are really not your fault, but you must turn the page and think like a realist. You do not want to repeat history and start your adult life also making erratic decisons about money.</p>

<p>Your parents are going to be unable to participate in your educational costs. I am also sorry that your father is concerned about cancer. Are you first generation college in your family?</p>

<p>If you are unable to persuade the financial aid office to offer you further discounts on your debt, than you have probably erred and gone forward with "magical thinking" on this tuition plan in your desire to get going on your education even though you knew that your folks could not pay their end due to their rocky credit history. You have to stop with the magical thinking and rethink how to get your education entirely. You are a bright guy, and I encourage you to not give up. </p>

<p>If you have the stats (which should be part of your persuasive argument with your current college to allow you to finish the semester..that you can't succeed or move on without a pristine transcript to take with you), it is possible that you should be applying to enter a well funded LAC that is not ridiculously hard to get in but that you can see on paper is not going to charge you much based on parental income. Wm and Mary for instance, where you were waitlisted, has ridiculously tough standards in stats for out of staters. Perhaps you have not applied to your "financial match" colleges where your stats would also be considered solid.</p>

<p>Two things come to mind. Is there an adult in your circle who is much more adept at dealing with bureaucracy/finances, someone who is sharp and realistic that you could speak with? Is there an adult who could help write a cover letter to the finance office explaining your circumstances and how you got yourself into attending college when your family could not assume their "share" of costs"? If they knew you were going to withdraw after this semester and move on to something more realistic, perhaps they will cut you a break with your current debt to them. It is not surprising that they don't want to accumulate debits from you for several more semesters.</p>

<p>Anyone from high school who would be interested in helping you figure out a plan to get educated sans parents? Do you have a guidance counselor at your high school who might also know of resources that have not been offered to you? </p>

<p>Are you at the point where you should consider working for a year or establishing yourself as financially emancipated from your parents? Find out what it takes to be considered emancipated. </p>

<p>I am a military brat. My father is the son of the man who was our town's Post Office Custodian for thirty years, a job he got as a WWI vet who did not complete high school. My Dad was bright but had no hope of college until WWII. He got up daily actually to work as a custodian's aide as a teen before going to his high school. He entered VMI as a young veteran of the Pacific, along with thirty or so other vets that year. He learned to fly fighter jets in Pensacola. bombers in New Mexico and the largest transport planes on the planet in Texas in service.</p>

<p>He got a masters in engineering from GA Tech paid for fifteen years later by the US Air Force based on his own moxey and competitive spirit. It wasn't easy going to college with younger men at VMI or at Georgia Tech but he was very successful because he was highly motivated, mature, knew this was the only way he could get a masters and he was excited about learning. </p>

<p>I know I am talking about a "past generation" but there are thousands of young men in service now with this same issue of coming from households with parents who could not float tuition to college...and they will be returning and entering colleges. </p>

<p>Think creatively. One thing my father had going for him was moxey. He was ready to leave for any corner of the USA where he could get an education.</p>

<p>In the immediate, find an adult who can serve as someone to help you draft a letter of explanation to your financial aide office or intervene. But come up with a reality based plan for next semester. Do NOT give up on getting your education.</p>

<p>However, I would not encourage you to get an education that has poor job prospects. It was a lot tougher for my Dad for instance to study engineering that it would have been for him to study history, a subject he enjoys. But he knew he was totally on his own and he had to have a degree that equated with a paycheck. </p>

<p>good luck, John. Think outside the box. Even think outside the state you live in. When you are enrolled in classes, make sure your grades show that you are a young man of substance that knows education has value.</p>